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Funny satire stories about Psychology

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Want to know your personality? There's an app for that!

Funny story: Want to know your personality? There's an app for that!

In the bad old days of psychotherapy, the therapist would feel the skull and determine a personality from the various bumps and ridges over the cranium. "The theory," said Mac Buck, editor of App World! magazine, "is that the brain's various cont...

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Mathematical Model Predicts Politicians Behavior

Funny story: Mathematical Model Predicts Politicians Behavior

New York NY: The Columbia University School of Abnormal Psychology has developed a mathematical computer model to predict the interests of current and former political figures after they leave office. Professor Freud (no relation to Sigmund) expla...

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Australia To Introduce Personality Testing To Identify Dangerous Dogs

Funny story: Australia To Introduce Personality Testing To Identify Dangerous Dogs

In an attempt to curb attacks on people by dangerous dogs, the Australian Veterinary Association (AVA) has proposed the introduction of research into conducting personality tests for canines. AVA spokesman, Jake Russell, told us "We have two issue...

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Bank robbed...by a gorilla, nobody saw a thing

Funny story: Bank robbed...by a gorilla, nobody saw a thing

The Dorking high street bank, Dorking High Street Bank of Dorking, was robbed on Friday morning by a daring bank robber. Although later analysis of the CCTV footage clearly showed the robber, nobody in the bank saw the robber, and the vast majority o...

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Complexes and suchlike

According to Carl Jung, (1875 -1961), a complex is 'a core pattern of emotions, memories, perceptions, and wishes organized around a common theme.' It is 'perfectly normal to have complexes because everyone has emotional experiences that affect the psyche. Although they are normal, negative complexes can cause pain and suffering'. An example given is the case of an individual, in childhood, who...

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Psychology Professor creates new syndrome in his lunch break

Funny story: Psychology Professor creates new syndrome in his lunch break

I'm sitting in Starbucks sat opposite the man of the moment - Martin Gamble, Professor of Behaviour, Undestanding and Motivation at the University of Redbrick. Martin has a unique gift, he is able to create a new Psychological Syndromes in his lunch break I ask Martin how he does it? Martin laughs and throws back his lustrous brown hair. He has a warm laugh. It's like taking a bath in rich crea...

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'The Human Brain Rewrites "Boring" Speech', Claims Study

Funny story: 'The Human Brain Rewrites "Boring" Speech', Claims Study

The human brain has the ability to make even the most boring stories vivid and entertaining, a leading brain scientist claims. This is because the brain's 'inner voice' can talk over even the most tedious speaker, according to Professor Jens Convo...

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Happy Monday? Don't Make Me Laugh, Says Local Grump

Funny story: Happy Monday? Don't Make Me Laugh, Says Local Grump

A local man has pooh-poohed the notion that today is the first happy day of the year. Psychologists claim that today, Monday, January 30, is the first happy day of the year because most Britons have just had their first pay cheque and have also pr...

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Link Discovered Between British Football and Crime Rates

Funny story: Link Discovered Between British Football and Crime Rates

Exeter Devon, UK: The results of a one year psychological study conducted by Dr. M. Shuttlecock, a noted London psychologist, has been published in the Surrey Psychological Observational Obsessive Functions (SPOOF) journal. The study investigated whe...

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Train Spotting makes it into the Psychologists Handbook

Funny story: Train Spotting makes it into the Psychologists Handbook

The definitive guide to what is a mental illness and what is normal behaviour is due for release at the end of the month. Previous additions to the tome have been ADHD and body dismorphia. "Until it is in the book," said the Handbook's editor,...

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New Chelsea Boss Andre Villas-Boas Doomed To PL Failure

Funny story: New Chelsea Boss Andre Villas-Boas Doomed To PL Failure

A group of leading sports psychologists are claiming that newly installed Chelsea boss, Andre Villas-Boas is doomed to Premier League failure, and that's before he even starts! Villas-Boas, who moved to Stamford Bridge from Porto this week has alr...

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Larry O'Mara Given an Honorary Harvard Psychology Degree

Funny story: Larry O'Mara Given an Honorary Harvard Psychology Degree

Cambridge MA: Larry O'Mara the owner of Larry's Bar and Grill, a working class tavern in this city, was presented an honorary PHD degree in psychology by Harvard University. The degree was in recognition of Larry's counseling people in his establishm...

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Psychologist Matches Luxury Car Models to Personalities

Funny story: Psychologist Matches Luxury Car Models to Personalities

Personality profiling and monetary spending pattern specialist, Dr. Hugh M. Ongusbeek, released a series of luxury car purchase findings today at the London Annual Psychoanalysis Conference, more affectionately labeled by insiders as the "Head Banger...

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God Admits 'I'm An Atheist'

Funny story: God Admits 'I'm An Atheist'

The Good Lord God has finally admitted to being an atheist. Speaking at a city luncheon earlier today the Creator appeared to have what witnesses were calling a 'breakdown', in front of a room full of high level banking officials. Claiming that...

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Psychologists Diagnose North Korea

Funny story: Psychologists Diagnose North Korea

NEW YORK - At a conference at the United Nations headquaters in New York City, psychologists have worked out how to solve a problem like Korea. North Korea, created as a separate state from South Korea, in September 1948 by UN and Soviet forces, h...

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Union bosses "psychopathic" according to study

Funny story: Union bosses "psychopathic" according to study

A recent study by the University of Camford has proven that trade union bosses are dumb psychopaths. Nerdy student Colin Anus PhD said "You see, many psychopaths have controlling tendencies, so they want to have a powerful job. But many people wit...

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I'm OK, You're OK Philosophy No Longer OK

Funny story: I'm OK, You're OK Philosophy No Longer OK

Psychologists have been following disturbing trends developing from a self help philosophy from the 1980's called Transactional Analysis. TA is based upon a consciousness growth bestseller book entitled "I'm OK, you're OK". Written by Thomas A. Harris MD, it was a book whose primary message was to base all relationships on the premise that everyone is OK just the way they are without any...

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Some people are on the pitch. They think it's all over.

Funny story: Some people are on the pitch. They think it's all over.

Yes, that's right, they're the England players. - Anyone who has been watching England's group matches will have to concede the team has not looked inspired or enthusiastic. Well all that is about to change. England have drafted in a new team of...

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Breaking news…

Trump Now Also President of Egypt

President Donald Trump now claims to be part Egyptian after a new mummy was uncovered. Noted the President, "Look! It's old, wrinkly, shriveled, and orange! Just like me!"
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