Out of an abundance of caution, a nuclear weapon was detonated in Baltimore after days of angry protests and riots crippled the city and damaged several properties. Working together, the local police and National Guard decided an atomic bomb was the...
African American males across the United States are to be equipped with body cameras in an attempt to combat the ever increasing crimes committed against them by law enforcement officers. Experts say that placing cameras on the potential victims r...
A case that is just one among a number that caused Eric Holder, the US attorney general, to sharply censure the, let's call it, the Cleavageland police department this week, is one where a "John Doe," who is a black man was shot in the chest by a pol...
Almost New York - The judge in the Eric Gardner police brutality case put a lid on the release of evidence and souvenir transcripts used by the grand jury to reach its mystifying decision. Good thing we had our judicial fly on the wall to listen in on juror comments. Here are some of their choice remarks: "I'm glad I live on an island." "If he wanted to breathe, he should've brought alon...
NEW YORK-A black suspect who died from a chokehold while in police custody apparently, according to the coroner who examined the body on Wednesday, suffered from the pre-existing condition of mortality. Rashawn Williams, the 27 year old suspect, w...
In a Channel 5 investigative report with journalist Jim Rosenthal, the Ferguson Caucasian police officer, who allegedly shot an unarmed African American teen to death in August, unwittingly admitted his true motive behind shooting the teen. Rosenthal asked the officer the following question, "Is it possible that the suspect could not drop his gun simply because he did not have a gun?" to which...
A recent report shows that Police officers, security guards, or self- appointed vigilantes extra judicially killed at least 313 African-Americans in 2012, according to a recent study. This means a policeman or security officer killed a black person e...
Sesame Street, USA - Police in Missouri are being told how to get to Sesame Street for career counseling and psychological reprogramming. "Every little boy plays soldier at some time in his development," said Evelyn Puchlens, executive director of...
In the never-ending wake of the 'Plebgate' debacle and scuzball Andrew Mitchell's perpetual whingeing for an apology another Tory cretin has jumped upon the band wagon. David-so good they almost named him twice-Davis has suggested that Police Offi...
Chicago - Police spokesperson S. Wineburger of the Chicago Police Department announced today that anyone pointing glasses at police conducting official business may be shot. It was previously reported here that police are now trained to shoot anyo...
After a televised ending to the manhunt many questions were raised about the police tactics that were used. A spokesman for the LAPD responded to allegations that, the department had bungled opportunities to end the manhunt earlier. It became the lo...
In the early hours of Sunday morning police raided a nightclub, 'Bilbo's', in the elvish city of Rivendell arresting 12 elves, 7 dwarves, 2 men and a wizard. The raid was part of Operation Gondor, a crackdown on crimes related to licensing laws ca...
Dorking Police's amateur hobbyists were celebrating yesterday after sweeping the board at the town's Annual Festival. The force's enthusiasts picked up the top gongs in contests for painting, photography, acting, gardening... you name it: if there...
In a story that Tampa, Florida police are attempting to keep quiet, an eighty year old naked lady was Tasered by a local constable late yesterday. According to media reports, the deputy stopped the woman in a "stop & frisk" operation. No one could explain, why? The media respecting the woman's privacy is withholding her name. Reporters were allowed to question the arresting officer after he...
NEW YORK - UPDATE 1 - Elvis is dying again. The robot was signing well when it paused for refreshment. After drinking a sugary 32 ounce soda in New York city, angry mobs of Bloomberg supporters chased the robot down Broadway, carrying 2 liter bott...
Fifteen people were arrested last night when Dorking Police swooped on the Our Lady Mary RC school to break up a "notorious" currency counterfeiting operation. Officers from Dorking Central Division, accompanied by dog handlers and an armed respon...
Police raided the Isandlwana Road Community Centre last night and arrested several people allegedly at the centre of a human trafficking scheme. Officers from Dorking Central Division, accompanied by dog handlers and an armed response unit, descen...
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