CHICAGO - The Amalgamated Data Gathering Agency, recently conducted a national survey to determine the worst cat names in the United States.
ADGA Executive Director Bagby B. Buckleybox, who has four cats, stated that over 825,000 individuals participated in the nationwide poll.
Many of the participants submitted foreign cat names, but it was decided that these names would not be used since a...
It has come to the attention of the Editors that certain first names do not age well with their owners. Before you choose a name for your girl baby, ask yourself these two key questions:
1. If the baby girl becomes a judge someday, does the name sound appropriate - as in "Judge________________(fill in blank with name).
2. Think of the baby as eventually being an elderly woman. Does the...
Naming babies can be such great fun for parents, especially new parents. However, the editors have brainstormed some names you probably should think twice about before using:
3. Pepe Le Pew
These are just some of the names for Hometown, USA that we wish we had thought up:
1. Rancho Cucamonga, California
2. Bill, Wyoming
3. Unalaska, Alaska
4. Turkey Scratch, Arkansas
5. Willacoochee, Georgia
6. Dinwhiddle, Indiana
7. Possum Trot, Kentucky
8. Shongaloo, Louisiana
9. Suckerville, Maine
10. Peanut, California
11. Whynot, Mississippi
Vehicle names for new car models can make or break cars sales. Here are some names that never quite made it out of the boardroom.
1. Kia Cheeseweed
2. Mercury Maggot
3. Ford Fluffy
4. Dodge Ball
5. Volkswagon Vole
6. Lincoln Constipator
6. Kia Kale
7. Hyundai Hushpuppy
8. Ford Fart
9. Volkswagon Aardvark
10. Saturn Sloth
11. Pontiac Perspire
WEST HOLLYWOOD - Kim Kardashian has it all, fame, money, fancy cars, fancy friends, expensive fancy underwear, and a brand new fancy baby (North West).
But lately the most popular member of the Kardashian clan has been very depressed.
BAGHDAD, Iraq - A spokesperson for the Iraqi government has said that Iraq will be changing the name of the capital within the next two months.
Jafsul Kiflar told the world news media assembled in Baghdad that Baghdad's new name will be Sand City.
Grandad, do you have problems remembering things?
I do. Names in particular. I have to make lists of all the nieces, grand nieces, nephews and grand nephews and learn them by heart.
You always get my name right.
Well, it's the same as your mother's and her mothers.
I get into trouble at school if I forget things.
Oh those awful maths things and the names in science. Real...
I write in the hope that you might sympathise with my plight. For none of mine aquaintance could be expected to proffer aught but brickbats, opprobrium or the cold shoulder.
You see, I have somehow acquired the reputation for being a bringer of ill-fortune.
"Get away!" they cry. "Why haunteth thou me thus?"
If I was a young man, I would have run away to sea long ago.
MACON, Georgia - Many residents of this central Georgia city located on the banks of the Ocmulgee River have expressed that they would favor the city's name being changed from Macon to Mandela.
One lifelong resident Grover P. Dazzle, 68, stated th...
DETROIT - Detroit Lions defensive tackle Ndamukong Suh, who is considered to be the dirtiest player in the NFL, has just made an astounding announcement.
Suh, who wears jersey number 90, spoke with Hercules Confetti of Sporting Chance Magazine at...
DUBLIN, Ohio - Wendy's is an international fast food chain that mainly sells hamburgers. It was founded in 1969, and currently has 6,650 restaurants world-wide.
The executives of the hamburger giant have expressed a desire to rename the company. T...
Sparks and Mensa, the home and fashion store for those in the top bracket of intelligence, have launched their new crisp range. There has been a slight hiccup in the launch, when it was discovered that the standard width crisp packet isn't wide enoug...
WASHINGTON, D.C. - It appears that Senator Ted "Teddy Boy" Cruz and most members of the Tea Party are extremely upset.
Cruz informed the news media that he and the Tea Party members want the media and people in general to stop referring to them as...
INDIANAPOLIS - The owner and CEO of the Indianapolis Colts, James Orsay, has informed the team coaches and players that he is considering changing the team name.
Orsay stated that he really and truly feels that the time is ripe to inject a new tea...
ARLINGTON, Virginia - There are now over 1,000 Five Guys Burgers franchises in the United States with more opening monthly.
A restaurant consultant, Ferguson B. Waxminnow, has suggested that in order to make the spouses feel like they are part of...
WATERLOO, Iowa - The Phineas & Penelope Fitch Traveling Sideshow & Carnival is the oldest in the United States. It is even older that The Buffalo Jeffrey & Chief Crazy Cow Traveling Sideshow & Carnival.
The carnival's owner and director of operations Phineas Fitch was recently interviewed by Redwood Fingerboo of The Cucamonga Chit Chat Chronicle.
Mr. Fitch was asked how many...
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