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Funny story: NFL Bends A Knee...And Dooms The Planet Earth

NFL Bends A Knee...And Dooms The Planet Earth

"All hail the Great and Almighty Solar King of the Universe, The Great and Awesome and Wise and Very, Very Dangerous, Zaxxorg The Third! Citizens of the smelly planet Earth, I have seen you kneel down to my awesome power and accept your unconditiona…

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Funny story: Every NFL Cheerleader is Furious as Hell

Every NFL Cheerleader is Furious as Hell

NEW YORK CITY – (Sports Satire) - The NFL Cheerleaders Union has just filed a complaint with the National Football League. Union rep Bambi Toogaloo told CBS Sports that Commissioner Goodell has informed each NFL cheerleader that she will have to c…

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Funny story: The NFL Has Banned The Tradition of Players Exchanging Football Helmets

The NFL Has Banned The Tradition of Players Exchanging Football Helmets

NEW YORK CITY – (Sports Satire) - The NFL commissioner informed the sports media that his latest directive will now prohibit the age-old tradition of players exchanging each other’s helmets at the end of the game. Roger Goodell, it seems, has rece…

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Funny story: The Green Bay Packers Announce They Will Be Allowing 200 Season Ticket Holders to Attend Their Opening Home Game

The Green Bay Packers Announce They Will Be Allowing 200 Season Ticket Holders to Attend Their Opening Home Game

GREEN BAY, Wisconsin – (Sports Satire) - The Green Bay Packers have the distinction of being the only sports team in America that is community-owned. The Packers have 350,000 stockholders, and they have voted 349,967 to 33, to allow 200 of the ol…

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Funny story: The NFL’s Decision to Play or Not Play Keeps Going Back and Forth

The NFL’s Decision to Play or Not Play Keeps Going Back and Forth

NEW YORK CITY – (Sports Satire) - NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell has put out another message saying that the previous message circumvents the former message. The media shook its head and uttered an appropriate WTF? Some writers said that Goodel…

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Funny story: President Trump Says He Will Probably End Up Cancelling The NFL Football Season

President Trump Says He Will Probably End Up Cancelling The NFL Football Season

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Sports Satire) - The president told Fox News that he might just move to cancel the NFL football season. He said that if the players are going to insist on kneeling, not saluting him, and refusing to donate to his presidential r…

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Funny story: NFL To Allow Players To Lie On Back And Have Bellies Rubbed During National Anthem

NFL To Allow Players To Lie On Back And Have Bellies Rubbed During National Anthem

BILLINGSGATE POST: In order to placate fans who don’t like to see players take a knee during the playing of the National Anthem, NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell issued a directive that will allow players the option of lying on their backs and having…

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Funny story: A Group of Miami Dolphin Fans Ask That The Team Name Be Changed

A Group of Miami Dolphin Fans Ask That The Team Name Be Changed

MIAMI – (Sports Satire) - A devoted group of Miami Dolphins fans have presented a petition to the team owner, Stephen Ross, to have the team name changed. The group which calls itself, “Any Name But Dolphins” says that the dismal record that the t…

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Funny story: The NFL Tells Tampa Bay Buccaneers Receiver Rob Gronkowski That His Partying Days Are Over

The NFL Tells Tampa Bay Buccaneers Receiver Rob Gronkowski That His Partying Days Are Over

NEW YORK CITY – (Funny sports story) The NFL has put its cleated foot down and issued a directive that it will not allow any player to be a party animal. The NFL singled out Rob Gronkowski of the Tampa Bay Bucs, who is an infamous party animal. Gr…

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Funny story: The Washington Redskins New Name is The Washington Football Team (For Now)

The Washington Redskins New Name is The Washington Football Team (For Now)

WASHINGTON, D.C. (Funny News) – The no-longer-a-racist owner of the NFL Washington team, Danny Snyder, has just announced that he has made a decision regarding the new team name. “Stressy” Snyder told the sports media that his decision is that he…

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Funny story: The NFL Cancels All Preseason Football Games

The NFL Cancels All Preseason Football Games

NEW YORK CITY – The directors of the NFL have announced that, due to the on-going Covid-19 pandemic, they have decided to cancel the preseason. The footballs, down markers, and Gatorade containers are being tucked away safely in stadium storage ro…

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Funny story: The NFL Reports That 72 Players Have Tested Positive For C-19

The NFL Reports That 72 Players Have Tested Positive For C-19

NEW YORK CITY – NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell says that there is no need for any alarm at the fact that 72 players are going into quarantine, after testing positive for the Trumpapalooza pandemic virus. Goodell told the news media that the player…

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Funny story: Red Lives Matter Demands That The Kansas City Chiefs Change Their Name

Red Lives Matter Demands That The Kansas City Chiefs Change Their Name

INDIANAPOLIS, Indiana – The Red Lives Matter organization, which is one of the newest of the ‘Lives Matter’ groups, has just put out a directive to the Kansas City Chiefs organization. A spokeswoman for the group has demanded that Clark Knobel Hun…

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Funny story: The Washington Redskins Name Has Finally Been Scalped

The Washington Redskins Name Has Finally Been Scalped

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Washington team owner Daniel Snyder may be a lot of things, but a dummy is not one of them. The multi-billionaire knows that, when big-time corporate sponsors like Pepsi, Nike, Bank of America, Red Lobster, the FBI, and FedEx, s…

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Funny story: J.J. Witt of The Houston Texans Says He Will Refuse to Wear The New C-19 NFL Face Shield Helmet

J.J. Witt of The Houston Texans Says He Will Refuse to Wear The New C-19 NFL Face Shield Helmet

HOUSTON – One of the greatest players to ever put on the Texans uniform has balked at wearing the new mandated C-19 Protective Helmet Face Shield. J.J. Witt, who owns several Witt’s End Beer Bars, said that he hates the new helmets, because he is…

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Funny story: Tom Brady Quarterback of The Tampa Bay Buccaneers, is Upset That The NFL Season Could be Cancelled

Tom Brady Quarterback of The Tampa Bay Buccaneers, is Upset That The NFL Season Could be Cancelled

TAMPA BAY – The man known by sports fans as "Tom Terrific" has just learned that the NFL season might be scrapped due to the Coronapalooza pandemic. Brady, who is as gung-ho an athlete as ever wore a jock strap, said that he will go into one hell…

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Funny story: NBC Announces That The Dallas Cowboys–Pittsburgh Steelers Hall of Fame Game Has Been Cancelled

NBC Announces That The Dallas Cowboys–Pittsburgh Steelers Hall of Fame Game Has Been Cancelled

NEW YORK CITY – NBC hates to inform the sports viewing public that the pre-season game between the Cowboys and the Steelers, which was to have taken place in Canton, Ohio, has been cancelled. It appears that more than 83% of all food vendors; incl…

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