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Funny satire stories about Kate Middleton

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Funny story: New Yorkers' disgust at $100,000-a-table Kate and William dinner

New Yorkers' disgust at $100,000-a-table Kate and William dinner

New York - "For that kind of money you'd at least expect a blow job over the flambe tart course," one wealthy New Yorker said today after being asked to stump up $100k for a gala dinner table with William and Kate, "just ask Michelle Obama!" The h...

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Funny story: A right Royal Carry on!

A right Royal Carry on!

The news that Kate Middleton is up the duff again has come as a major surprise to the Royal household, especially Liz and Phil, the latter swearing fucking blind that he was nowhere near Kate's bedroom when she was on heat! Liz is particularly pis...

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Funny story: Kate Middleton's cocaine dealer uncle is supermarket's Mr Bombastic

Kate Middleton's cocaine dealer uncle is supermarket's Mr Bombastic

London - Gary Goldsmith has a new line of work after securing a contract channeling national supermarket's Mr Bombastic. A series of naff TV ads promoting the price cutting supermarket features the 69 year-old as a savvy pot-bellied gnome outsmar...

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Funny story: Royal Body language experts determine Prince George will grow to be expert at pooping, crying

Royal Body language experts determine Prince George will grow to be expert at pooping, crying

Only a year old and yet body language experts have already signalled that Prince George will be fantastic at both crying and pooping. "We studied several videos of the young prince and surprisingly he showed a real interest in crying his head off...

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Funny story: Kate Expectations: The Sequel

Kate Expectations: The Sequel

That well known 'sword-swallower' and Prince Haribo's nocturnal poke, Kate, the Duchess of Crumpet is said to be absolutely delighted with the current global press 'exposure' of her pert, tight anus. As befits the Royal harlot this 'accident' was...

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Funny story: Kate Middleton Using Craigslist for Royal Palace Furnishings

Kate Middleton Using Craigslist for Royal Palace Furnishings

London, EN Kate Middleton, future queen of England, who recently used Craigslist to find a new nanny for Prince George, has been taking advantage of Craigslist to bargain-hunt for furnishings for the various royal palaces. As of last week, she has purchased: -382 sets of drapes for Buckingham Palace and some kilts for Balmoral. -A new love seat, French Provincial chairs, and a few Queen...

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Funny story: Russell Brand shaves beard, gets mistaken for Kate Middleton

Russell Brand shaves beard, gets mistaken for Kate Middleton

Los Angeles, Ca - Strolling down Rodeo Drive this afternoon the former smack addict husband of Katy Perry nearly caused a riot after being besieged by paparazzi convinced he was royal Brit scrounger Kate Middleton. "Actually he's slightly prettier...

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Funny story: Queen to Kate Middleton: Drop The Skirts!

Queen to Kate Middleton: Drop The Skirts!

Kate appears to have heard the order but was confused for a short period when she thought the Queen meant to strip! However, Kate Middleton's grandmother-in-law is demanding lower hemlines, not the dropping of the skirt. According to Britain's Ma...

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Funny story: Kate Middleton spends 69th birthday in hair extension rehab

Kate Middleton spends 69th birthday in hair extension rehab

London, UK - Royal benefits scrounger Kate Middleton was airlifted to the London Trichology Climic for Balding Old Hos this morning after most of the synthetic tresses on her head dropped off following a disastrous birthday scalp massage from Nanny...

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Funny story: Taxman slaps royal scroungers William and Kate with backdated £1million bill

Taxman slaps royal scroungers William and Kate with backdated £1million bill

London, UK - Feckless gold-digger Kate Middleton and her idler spouse Prince William have been hit with a backdated £1million bill following an orgy of taxpayer handouts nodded through by Prince Charles. The bill covers more than three years of th...

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Funny story: Look of sheer disbelief on Kate Middleton's face as the penny finally drops about whose Christmas present is the fabulous ocean-going superyacht 'Azzam'

Look of sheer disbelief on Kate Middleton's face as the penny finally drops about whose Christmas present is the fabulous ocean-going superyacht 'Azzam'

London, England - 'Sick as parrot' hardly does justice to the look on royal gold-digger Kate Middleton's face at discovering the identity of just whose Christmas present this year is the world's newest, biggest, most awesome billion-dollar superyacht...

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Funny story: Kate Middleton channels the White Widow

Kate Middleton channels the White Widow

London - A classic 'Il Duce' one-finger gesture saw royal brat George Windsor greet the Archbishop of Canterbury today trumped only by mother Kate Middleton channeling the White Widow in a meringue-themed christening get-up from George At Asda. "A...

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Funny story: Yuck, disgusting! Kate Middleton is pregnant again

Yuck, disgusting! Kate Middleton is pregnant again

London - Less than a year after being admitted to the Royal Freak Hospital with attention deficit vomiting virus the cunning minx has fallen pregnant again, possibly with William's second. The news leaked out early this morning after a discarded r...

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Funny story: 'Cameron In Bed With Sister-in-Law' spoiler in Kate Middleton shagging row

'Cameron In Bed With Sister-in-Law' spoiler in Kate Middleton shagging row

London - Pics of Big Dave out for the count on some ho's double bed have reassured pubic opinion a Party spokesperson said tonight. The PM and his red Official Dispatch Box were snapped in flagrente after shagging Kate Middleton at a Master Bates...

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Funny story: Voyeurism: It's not just for perverts anymore!

Voyeurism: It's not just for perverts anymore!

Voyeurism is the pastime of spying on someone who is unaware of his or her presence. were the victim aware, he or she (usually, she) wouldn't be lolling around naked in the first place, especially in the presence, seen or unseen, of anyone else (unless she is also an exhibitionist). If the voyeur is hard up enough to ogle someone in secret and there is no one available to ogle, he will usually...

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Funny story: Cherie's rapture as daughter Kate Middleton claims 'Occupation: Princess' on baby's birth certificate

Cherie's rapture as daughter Kate Middleton claims 'Occupation: Princess' on baby's birth certificate

London - The dirty old Scouser's gargantuan social climbing ambitions are orgasming deliriously at her Italian mobster daughter Kate Middleton's latest scam. Asked to describe her occupation on Baby Prince George Bush's birth certificate the daft...

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Funny story: Elton John Wants To Be Kate and William's New Baby's Godfather

Elton John Wants To Be Kate and William's New Baby's Godfather

NEW YORK CITY - Elton John was in New York City shopping for a certain brand of boa that is only sold in the Big Apple. As he was shopping he was asked by Ashburn Wasabi with The Right Coast Revue what he thought about William and Kate's new baby...

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