Members of the UK Border Force are enjoying holding up people trying to get through passpoprt control at Heathrow, we can reveal. Waiting times have been seriously affected by the Easter holidays with some passengers waiting for more than an hour...
Steward, Paul Schwing, emailed his partner George Snapalogupos, who works for a Greek Airline, just before Paul's British Airway's flight A069, left Buffalo Airport, New York,this evening, heading for Heathrow Airport, London, England. George imme...
In a brave move to "get Britain moving", the Department for Transport has announced a dramatic plan for both the London Underground and Heathrow Airport. The Minister for Transport, Con Seezontiquet, announced that work starts immediately on exten...
After a slight altercation at home, a gay man stormed out of the place with a bulging handbag threatening to blow up Heathrow. The man (?) a 72 year old pensioner was last seen rushing towards the airport and could be easily identified because of the...
The examination of a suspect package that temporarily closed a section of Terminal 5 is rumoured to have belonged to pop diva Lady Gaga. A spokesman confirmed the incident saying they were aware of the allegation that the pop biscuit may have been...
Animals arriving at Heathrow airport, even those transferring to other flights, must now pass through the Animal Reception Centre. A spokesperson stated that it is well known that drugs and other contraband are smuggled in using animals from various...
In the wake of Heathrow Airport's shocking inability to handle the winter weather, a snitchy insider has claimed that those in charge of the laughing stock of the air travel industry were always going to show their incompetence and inability to deal...
Heathrow Airport, UK, are a bunch of incapable losers claim many stranded tourists hoping to escape the "Christmas tinsel plastic hell" that the British festive season has turned into. Due to the terrible weather Heathrow seem to be totally hopele...
HeathROW, London: Staff armed with loud hailers, ordered travellers to leave the airport and go home or else to a hotel. One woman shouted back: "We have nowhere to go." Emotions ran high with some people, desperate to be home for Christmas, leavi...
A drugs mule was detained in Heathrow this morning, moments before boarding an aeroplane to the USA. The mule, Dean, an ex Brighton donkey, was caught carrying over 40 kilos of cocaine in two panniers strapped across his back. Airport staff bec...
LONDON, England - An enterprising former airport security worker has hatched a plan to take some of the very best photos he captured of various co-workers and travelers coming through the newly installed full-body scanners at Heathrow Airport and off...
Heathrow, London: Fresh from their Northumbrian campaign, in the search for Raoul Moat, the miniature Wehrmacht have been on manoeuvres again, this time at Heathrow. The miniature Wehrmacht, kitted out again with pseudo-military outfits and coals...
A fire burst into flames this morning at a site near to Heathrow airport. This latest incident comes amidst BA's crisis talks with the Unite union and staff's continued walkouts. Willie Walsh is said to be fuming over yet another setback for the...
LONDON - A lot of Cheryl Cole's closest friends say that they have not seen Chezza happier than she's been the last few days. And they all attribute it to her American boyfriend Derek "The Dancing Dude" Hough. Hough flew into Heathrow Airport from...
LONDON - Sir Basil Nigel Cheesejoy, deputy director of all Heathrow flights, has stated that all flights originating from "Big H" are cancelled due to, as he so eloquently put it, "All of the damn, friggin, bloomin' ass blitherin', bloody blimey volc...
LONDON - The Scottish lass Susan Boyle has been on quite a tear lately. SuBo had just returned to Great Britain after a whirlwind tour of Japan in which she performed for over one million fans, most Japanese. When Madam Boyle first arrived in Japa...
LONDON - Airport officials at Heathrow today prevented a woman of Saudi Arabian descent from boarding a Trans Atlantic flight from London to Boston. The woman, who was identified as Duba Meccavitz, reportedly had a total of 39 tattoos just on her...
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