Singer Willie Nelson is moving to Colorado for the annual Farm Aid this year calling it, "We Are The Wired". Same great headliners and he's invited survivors from the old Grateful Dead group and all Dead Heads can get in at a discount. "This has n...
In a short speech Friday morning that was watched closely by the nation's farmers, Vice President Joe Biden and some of the members of the House of Representatives announced that there was no use for panic among the cattle ranchers and farmers. "W...
WICHITA, Kansas - Buford Buttonspoon has become one of the most popular farmers in his neck of the woods. The 71-year-old hog farmer recently revealed that a year ago last Labor Day, he was out slopping his hogs when he started humming the Beatles...
IOWA CITY, Iowa - Many Iowa farmers are up in arms at the announcement that the state may be in the process of outlawing the use of scarecrows on all Iowa farms. A clerk in the governor's office informed reporters for three of Iowa's largest newsp...
HANNIBAL, Missouri - Elmo Tuggletint, 53, has been raising egg-laying hens for over 30 years and in that time he has seen some very interesting things. He recalls back in October of 1994, seeing one of his prized chickens, Linda Lou, lay an amazin...
ARKADELPHIA, Arkansas - Mildred P. Pettypicker, 88, has just admitted to the Arkadelphia Police Department that she shot a drone as it was flying over her and her husband, Elmer Ted's okra farm. Mildred told investigating officers that she shot it...
KENOSHA, Wisconsin - Dairy farmer Wendell Hickenbocker, 68, who has been in the cow milking business for 47 years, said that he has been watching CNN and hearing a lot about these so called spy drones that Canada is reportedly sending up to spy on Am...
BUENOS AIRES, Argentina (MOT) - Argentina announced a price freeze on supermarket products Monday in an effort to break spiraling obesity. The price freeze applies to every product in all of the nation's largest supermarkets, the government's news...
Vast swathes of countryside in Suffolk were splattered with stinking cow-shit yesterday when a giant muck-spreader ran out of control, after the driver collapsed. The massive muck-spreader, thought to be from Schittlodes Farm, Great Toddington, ha...
LANCASTER COUNTY, Pennsylvania (ABSNN) - A vast number of the farms in this Pennsylvania county have no electricity, no televisions, no telephones, no motor vehicles, no Honey Boo Boo. They are Amish folk, and yet, even the Amish know of the Twiligh...
During the recent floods in Yorkshire, local farmer Henry Shawtass managed to keep his buttocks dry whilst rescuing sheep from his flooded fields. Mr Shawtass - who is only 5 ft tall - went back to borrow his wife's high-heeled wellington...
COW PATTY, IOWA (ABSNN) - Mitt Romney attmpted to show farmers he was one of them at a dairy farm in this small Iowa village Saturday morning. It didn't turn out well for the Republican nominee. He was injured while "milking" a bull that was isolat...
Herds of well trained cows have stormed supermarkets and local government buildings in a bid to support the farmers' strike. A calculated and precise act of terrorism has prevented customers from purchasing milk. It has been alleged farmers have...
Pennsylvania legislature voted unanimously Friday April 8th 2011 to provide Bovine subsidies to cattle farmers to help them comply with their ultra strict Pennsylvania Climate Change Act of July 2008. This subsidy will reimburse farmers $1,000 per a...
Back in the day during the summer after my first two semesters of college, I came across a high school friend who was taking summer school college courses as was I. Why anyone would ever want to be associated with any college I went to was beyond me. He introduced me to the sport of racquet ball and after the second set of summer courses he invited me to go on his annual two week trip to Nor...
A local farmer was arrested at his farm today, after being caught wearing 'non conformist' clothing. The farmer, Jeb Doyle, had decided to shun the usual attire of manure caked wax jacket, in favour of a rather colourful, shiny cotton ski jacket.
There was a near miss for Grassington last Sunday when a massive tractor pulling a 'really wide' load up Main Street failed to squeeze through the gap between the Foresters' Arms pub and the Dales Bookshop. The load consisted of a huge tank of ch...
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