Showing:

Funny satire stories about England football team

Try another search?

Funny story: The Secret England Footballer: The Swedes and Me Looking Like a Turnip

The Secret England Footballer: The Swedes and Me Looking Like a Turnip

"Lack of egos" in this England team is apparently what people are saying. "Esprit de corps" and lack of egos is exactly right and that's what's wrong with this team. Nobody has the balls to stand up to "Mr. Southgate" and tell him where he's going wr...

Read full story
Funny story: The Secret England Footballer: Belgium Gone, Bring on Colombia

The Secret England Footballer: Belgium Gone, Bring on Colombia

Well, I've been basking in the glorious defeat that was the Belgium match, just like the rest of the lads. One thing is spoiling it. No, that's not right...two things are spoiling it...no booze and no birds. I ask you. "Mr. Southgate" still wouldn't...

Read full story
Funny story: Man's Terrifying Dreams Come True

Man's Terrifying Dreams Come True

A man in Battambang awoke in a cold sweat this morning after a restless night during which he had several nightmares, but this was only the start of his torture, as the disturbing things he had experienced whilst asleep, began to reveal themselves as...

Read full story
Funny story: Football-England Loses and Wins at the Same Time

Football-England Loses and Wins at the Same Time

In a classic twist similar to the end of the film" Inception", the England team have simultaneously won and lost a match to Belgium. By losing to the pus-filled pimple on the face of the Earth that is Belgium, England have actually won an easier r...

Read full story
Funny story: The Secret England Footballer: Bloody Hell, Panama 6-1

The Secret England Footballer: Bloody Hell, Panama 6-1

Bloody hell I say and I'll say it again BLOODY HELL. A goal fest and where was I? I'll bloody well tell you, I was warming the effin bench again. It's every player's dream to play in a World Cup and as you know Brazil 2014 was a washout for me aft...

Read full story
Funny story: England Trounces Panama after Surprise Goals

England Trounces Panama after Surprise Goals

England surged to a 6-1 victory against Panama today in the most surprising and uplifting match so far in the World Cup. Harry Kane was so successful at scoring goals during the match that he actually scored a goal withour realising it and had to...

Read full story
Funny story: England V Panama

England V Panama

A dominant display from England saw them trounce a hapless Panamanian side 6-1. Goals from Stones (2) Kane (3) and Lingard ensured England wrapped up their biggest win at a World Cup without breaking a sweat. Of course after this superb England...

Read full story
Funny story: The Secret England Footballer: First Round Tunisia Yessssssssss!

The Secret England Footballer: First Round Tunisia Yessssssssss!

Would you Adam and Eve it? We only bloody did it. We bloody won a match. Harry, you're not the wuss I've been saying you are (not to your face, obviously). Hats off to the Tottenham mumbler. I always knew you were class. There was one downer for m...

Read full story
Funny story: The Secret England Footballer: Russia 2018 Repino base

The Secret England Footballer: Russia 2018 Repino base

What a dump. I checked Tripadvisor before coming here and it's even worse then I thought. I'm in the middle of nowhere and there are less than 3,000 people here. Points of interest: Chapel of Saints Cosmas and Damian, you won't find me in there,...

Read full story
Funny story: The Secret England Footballer: Russia 2018 Call Up

The Secret England Footballer: Russia 2018 Call Up

I know...I know what you’re thinking. How is it that after two years in the wilderness Gormless Gareth has seen the light and called me back into the squad? I’ll tell you how. Even GG knows class when he sees it and it’s when the going gets tough...

Read full story
Funny story: England Head Coach Shocker

England Head Coach Shocker

For the last few years women's football has been on an upward trajectory with record attendances at world cups, the Dutch side winning the European championships playing some excellent football and the standard of goal keeping improving to the point...

Read full story
Funny story: Southgate V Slovenia

Southgate V Slovenia

England's managerial waterboy, Gareth Southgate, has sensationally admitted that "some if not all" of his current squad don't deserve to be there! England are scheduled to play Slovenia tonight and Gareth is obviously worried about the threat the...

Read full story
Funny story: Sam Allardyce Resigns From England Job With 100% Record

Sam Allardyce Resigns From England Job With 100% Record

England football manager Sam Allardyce today stepped down from the post, and immediately became the first England team manager in history to leave the job with a 100% record. Allardyce, who took over from previous boss, Roy Hodgson, in July, guide...

Read full story
Funny story: Allardyce Names Squad For 2018 World Cup Embarrassment

Allardyce Names Squad For 2018 World Cup Embarrassment

Sam Allardyce has named his 23 man squad for the 2018 FIFA World Cup with Paul Gasgoine in alongside Kenny Sansom while Bobby Charlton and Gordon Banks miss out along with the late Stanley Matthews. Gasgoine impressed during Euro '96 scoring again...

Read full story
Funny story: All Quiet On The England Front

All Quiet On The England Front

After England's failure in the Everyone Got A Invite (Except Scotland) Championships the inevitable inquest into what went wrong began. Back and to the Left news believes that we scored less goals than the opposition and that's what went wrong. Then...

Read full story
Funny story: Icelandic Vikings invade English rights to rule the waves and win hands down!

Icelandic Vikings invade English rights to rule the waves and win hands down!

England, a long, long time ago ruled the waves! Pillaged, raped and robbed the riches of others and built an Empire upon those riches! Only the Vikings from Northern Europe managed to withstand these attacks and after last night's invasion they prove...

Read full story
Funny story: Elizabeth Waynes

Elizabeth Waynes

Fans of Queen Elizabeth took to Twitter today to celebrate her overtaking Wayne Rooney's England scoring record. As she has been on the throne for 63 years and Rooney is only 30 it is clear who has wayned the longest. The national anthem has been...

Read full story

Breaking news…
Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Subscribe…
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more