We've been told to count calories if we want to control our weight. But now we need to do even more counting, according to a new weight control strategy recommended by the specialist counting agency Counts 'R'Us. They say that if we expend exactly...
Drink-spiking drug and racoon laxative, Rohypnol, actually counts as one of your five-a-day according to sometimes sex offender, Gavin McCloroform. Gavin, a thirty-eight-year-old dietician from Cardiff, claims the drug is misunderstood and with t...
MUNCIE, Indiana - In an unbelievable turn of events, Clover Q. Chitterling of Muncie took his 187-pound Great Dane Mr. Bruiser to get neutered. And what occurred afterward was simply astounding. Mr. Chitterling, who is an unemployed private invest...
Many children in poor families are not eating proper meals because most of the food is eaten by their over-weight parents. These parents are now being ordered to skip meals and take up skipping instead so that their starving kids will have a bit m...
CHICAGO - Reports coming out of the Windy City state that there are some astonishing marital rumblings emanating from the Justin Timberlake - Jessica Biel marriage. The couple known as TimBi have barely been married three weeks and a close source...
DENVER, CO--Insisting that it is "the best part", Angelo Delagol offered to consume the uneaten and undesired portion of his tablemate's meal, sources from Outback Restaurant on 40th Avenue reported Sunday. "Really, you're not gonna eat it?" Delag...
Spiderman, Spiderman, does whatever a spider can, including being eaten by Robin, the sidekick of Batman. "It was a moment of predator versus prey," said Superman, who had seen the whole thing from a window ledge in Metropolis. "I couldn't believe...
The Cambridge branch of the Extreme Eaters Club are on the look out for new members after they recently introduced a Fossil Course. "This seemed like a logical next step," said Extreme Eater, Heston Blumenthal. "We'd done the various other forms o...
Many people in Britain live below the poverty line and struggle to get enough food to eat. As a result, rickets is making a comeback, as are nutritional disorders that Britain thought it had left in the middle ages. "It's getting so bad," said nut...
Simon Cowell, high trousered music mogul and inventor of the sarcastic put-down to already inferior people, has sensationally revealed the secret to his fantastic success in everything he does. Parsnips. That's right, parsnips. And lot's of them.
More sedentary workers are eating their desks during their lunch-hour instead of going out to a café or furniture shop. Some just nibble at desk-top corners, but many have been seen biting big chunks off. Office workers are making themselves more...
Nottingham Company Costwise Diet Foods, introduced its new range of Locally produced menu courses, hopefully to be available for Christmas. The new meals are designed to be the most economical, and nourishing available. We spoke with the owner,...
A made redundant 64 year-old local man, is to open a 'Olde World Specialist' restaurant in Nottingham. Owner Ivor Deathwish, explained his thinking and plans to our Food reporter Ulrika Garlic. "Well at first, I noticed the vast amount of bankr...
Today saw the launch of Grossbook, the new social network site specially for the clinically obese, overeaters and the world's general fast-food junkies. Jane Lardbucket, a 32 stone professional eater from Glasgow had the idea when she was trying t...
Arsenal have signed South Korean Park Chu-Young from French side Monaco, and it is fair to say local dog owners are not happy. Although Arsene Wenger has brought in the 26-year-old striker to boost his side attacking force, It has caused shock-wav...
A taste for celery is one that many people never acquire, but scientists have just given them a reason to eat it. They have discovered that a chemical found in high concentrations in celery - and in peppers - could halt memory loss as we get older...
Takeru Kobayashi is a free man after a New York judge ruled to dismiss all charges against the skinny Japanese speed-eater accused of crashing a hot dog eating contest. Human python Kobayashi holds records for eating: 63 hot dogs in 12 minutes...
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