A UK village which raised £37,000 to offer 200 homes the super-fast connectivity that BT could not deliver, has launched its network. Spudland Telecom will offer the residents of Flyddington speeds of up to 2 carrier pigeons per hour. Other teleco...
The markets have been encouraged today following a sharp upturn in retail hardware sales reported by B&Q and Homebase. A spokesman for the retail consortium BodgitFixit Group reported that since last Monday, when the Daily Telegraph began rele...
Byron Bay, Aus - CEO of a prominent chain of hardware stores has announced actor and star of Wolverine, Hugh Jackman, is to have a brand new tool named after him. The Hugh Jackman is a brand new, previously unnamed tool, which looks like a cross b...
The popular 'How To Make One' series continues now, with a look at something 9 out of every 10 Americans have, and 97 out of every 100 Australians have - a swimming pool in the back garden! Most people in Britain will be unfamiliar with the concept of having a pool in their garden; almost all will, however, have visited their local swimming baths for a swim, and to enjoy the experience of havin...
For years, people have wondered what DIY superstore B&Q's initials stood for. After a variety of suggestions, such as Block and Quail and Been and Queued, Euan Sutherland admitted during his appointment speech that it does not actually stand for...
DIY chain B&Q has been handed a contract believed to be worth $3.5bn to supply around 100 pots of their own brand tile grouting following problems with space shuttle insulation coming away on take-off. The next scheduled scheduled flight was t...
A controversy is controversing like buggery today over plans by retail giant, B&Q, who according to reports being reported, is planning to ban the sale of gardening implements. A spokesman for the DIY chain commented: "Gardening gear can be...
A couple from London are getting married, after meeting over the last tin of Ronseal in a DIY shop. Reginald Kendall III, and his bride to be Felicity Dwight met in an un-named DIY emporium after both were looking for an elusive tin of Ronseal Qui...
Intelligent viewers across the United Kingdom are looking forward to the start of series eighteen of Big Paint Drier, which starts next week.
Sam Wickes the Government Junior Health Minister announced plans today Monday 29th October 2007 that the first DIY Hospital was to be built for the NHS Trust.
Overly-homosexual Irish innuendo peddler Graham Norton is releasing his own range of gay-friendly DIY products. The bum-loving leprechaun expects his 'Poof's Powertools' to hit (and fix) shelves in time for the inevitable sludgy torrent t...
A DIY giant has been rapped by trade unions for getting prospective employees to sing, dance and generally act the fool as part of their interview process.
Those who suffer daily embarrassment due to the size of their small breasts will soon be able to participate in a brand new scheme from the NHS.
Mark Armond, 34 and a hairdresser by day, was shocked today by the results of using a tool which had heretofore never affected his day to day hammering.
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