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Funny satire stories about Corporations

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Funny story: Unemployed Texans Used To Feed Homeless

Unemployed Texans Used To Feed Homeless

A Dallas based Food company has found a creative way of feeding the cities ever growing homeless population, the unemployed. Using cutting edge human to food technology, the folks at "I Can't Believe it's Not Chicken" are helping shrink the rank...

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Funny story: American Corporation Expresses Thanksgiving Gratitude for "Citizens United"

American Corporation Expresses Thanksgiving Gratitude for "Citizens United"

"Before Citizens United," mused patriotic, all-American (outsourcing aside) corporation Corp. Inc., "I didn't have a great sense of who I really was. I didn't want to be all business, all the time. Now I don't have to be. I'm a person." A little b...

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Funny story: Due To The State Of Our Society, Thanksgiving Name To Be Changed To 'Selfish-Taking'.

Due To The State Of Our Society, Thanksgiving Name To Be Changed To 'Selfish-Taking'.

Thanksgiving, once a proud cornerstone of our traditional American holidays with roots harkening back to our Pilgrim forefathers, is now comatose on the border of rigor mortis. At one time it was considered to be the most family oriented of celebrati...

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Funny story: Starbucks Latest Marketing Campaign a "Beacon To Government Officials"

Starbucks Latest Marketing Campaign a "Beacon To Government Officials"

Starbucks Coffee has begun a new marketing campaign billed as a way to call upon Congress to "come together" and stop bickering. From Wednesday to Friday, Starbucks will give away a free tall brewed coffee to any customer in the U.S. who buys anot...

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Funny story: Corporate C.E.O.s Organize for More Pay

Corporate C.E.O.s Organize for More Pay

Ever since President Ronald Reagan busted the air-traffic controllers' union, organized labor has been on the decline. Now, that trend has begun to change with the formation of the 'Fortune 500 Executive Leader's Union'. The fledgling union has a...

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Funny story: A List of 10 More Companies That Have Dropped Paula Deen

A List of 10 More Companies That Have Dropped Paula Deen

SAVANNAH, Georgia - Former Food Network cooking show host Paula Deen has literally had her culinary world turned upside down like one of her famous peach cobbler upside down cakes. The 66-year-old Southern fried native of Savannah, Georgia says sh...

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Funny story: New Starbucks Opens Up Inside Starbucks

New Starbucks Opens Up Inside Starbucks

Residents of New York City's Union Square area were delighted when a new Starbucks store opened up inside Union Square's already-existing Starbucks. Sean Kingsley, a graduate film student at nearby New York University, said that the opening of the...

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Funny story: Manhattan Woman Takes Crappy Job to Pay Bills

Manhattan Woman Takes Crappy Job to Pay Bills

In a move that horrified her spiritually-minded friends, 32-year-old Kim Lewiston, who resides in New York's East Village, decided to take a crappy job in order to pay her mounting bills. The decision did not come easily to Kim, who's always been...

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Funny story: Multinational Corporation Sues Itself

Multinational Corporation Sues Itself

Detroit MI: The Apex Parts Corporation (APC) manufactures parts for all types of commercial vehicles and heavy equipment at locations around the world. APC won a multi-million dollar contract from one of Detroit's big three automakers to design and...

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Funny story: Woman Becomes First to Marry a Corporation

Woman Becomes First to Marry a Corporation

Local woman, Elizabeth Potter, will be the first person to actually marry a corporation. The Supreme Court ruled that corporations have the same rights and responsibilities as a person. Potter states that her marriage to Apple, Inc will help en...

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Funny story: Maybe Corporate Personhood is a Good Thing ... ??

Maybe Corporate Personhood is a Good Thing ... ??

No, no, really (he says, doing his very best, over-the-top, under-the-weather Ricky Gervais). Bear with me for a sec. If those who advocate for corporations to be persons (*cough* *hack* -- the 1%) follow through consistently with their political beliefs (granted, with Gingrich and Romney as standard-bearers, not very likely - but this is my satirical piece, so let me finish) … Anyways, if corp...

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Funny story: New website to ensure sweat shop workers efforts don't go to waste

New website to ensure sweat shop workers efforts don't go to waste

A new website is being launched to ensure the many thousands of sweat shop workers whose efforts in subsidising the profits of multi-national corporations around the globe, are not wasted in a blither of fake goods. The website, called Brand-i, a...

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Funny story: Cameron Accepts Tony Montana As New Advisor

Cameron Accepts Tony Montana As New Advisor

David Cameron today confirmed that Tony Montana would be employed by the government in a drive to increase import and export figures for the UK. The self styled Cuban Mafia Man is said to have accepted the role that Lord Alan Sugar was un-able to...

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Funny story: Latest Rooney Outrage: Incorporates Himself, Saves 22% in Taxes!

Latest Rooney Outrage: Incorporates Himself, Saves 22% in Taxes!

Saying 'from now on just call me "Inc",' $320K a week "lover" Wayne Rooney announced his name change at a press conference at a local high end exotic car dealership where he was 'window shopping." "Wayne Inc has a certain ring to it," said the smi...

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Funny story: The Man: Sick And Tired Of Being Damned!

The Man: Sick And Tired Of Being Damned!

'The Man', faceless entity of many souless corporations the world over, sensationally came out last night and said he was 'sick and tired of being damned'. "Whenever something goes wrong," he crooned "I get blamed. Prices go up, damn The Man! No p...

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Funny story: Corporate Mission Statements For Our Modern Times

Corporate Mission Statements For Our Modern Times

Mission statements are a modern attempt to give meaning and a face to a corporation's work in its never ending pursuit of profits. They are a statement on a business's real intents and purposes. Supposedly. The problem is that the face it makes is lopsided and the meaning is muddled. If they were to say what their real intents and interests are, they would probably look something like this: To...

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Funny story: Gods of Seduction

Gods of Seduction

In Greek mythology, Peitho, a female, was the goddess of persuasion and seduction; now, men, like Ross Jeffries, are the gods of seduction. In the past, brave, down-to-earth men were the leaders of their societies; now, good-for-nothing hypocrites, sponsored by CEOs of large corporations, are in charge of the world.

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