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Funny satire stories about Beards

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Funny story: Bearded Man Spills Breakfast but Finds Car Keys

Bearded Man Spills Breakfast but Finds Car Keys

Horace Felchman, reformed Amish farmer turned general handy man was attempting to eat his breakfast at the Daisy Diner this morning only to have dropped a fork full of pancakes and pork sausage into his ample beard. Reaching in through the twisted f...

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Funny story: Bald Headed Man Grows Big Beard

Bald Headed Man Grows Big Beard

Bald headed man, Terry Brynner has taken five months to grow a really big bushy beard. Brynner told friends that there is a method in his apparent madness, because he read somewhere on the internet that a surgeon in Sao Paulo, Brazil, has perfected a...

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Funny story: Isle of Wight Man Allows Facial Hair To Grow

Isle of Wight Man Allows Facial Hair To Grow

A Newport man has surprised friends and colleagues by allowing his facial hair to grow for several weeks. Simon Crimp, who works for a local sanitary supplies company, woke up one morning too late to have a shave before he left for the office.

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Funny story: The Evolution of Darwin's Beard

The Evolution of Darwin's Beard

The controversy created by Charles Darwin regarding evolution and creationism over one hundred years ago has taken on a new twist centering on the famously extravagant beard of the father of evolution. Nearly as famous as the man itself, Darwin's...

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Funny story: Adrian Chiles Buys False Beard

Adrian Chiles Buys False Beard

A man who works part time in a local pound shop has said that a man bearing more than a passing resemblance to BBC presenter Adrian Chiles was seen entering a theatrical costumier's shop and buying a big false ginger beard. "It was a massive furr...

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Funny story: Britain's biggest lottery winners already broke

Britain's biggest lottery winners already broke

It was a dream come true for a bearded couple from Gloucestershire today when they came forward to reveal that they were the winners of the 56 million pound Euromillion lottery prize. But within hours of going public and receiving the cash the cou...

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Funny story: BBC to Ban Beards

BBC to Ban Beards

The BBC is to Ban Beards starting with One Show presenter Adrian Chiles who has recently been seen on the show with his new image the scruffy unshaven look. It is not clear at present if this ban will only be for BBC presenters or if all BBC progr...

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Funny story: Boxing Bans Bearded Boxers

Boxing Bans Bearded Boxers

Bearded Boxers have to be banned from taking part in boxing competitions because they find it difficult to scratch an itchy face if their hand is in a boxing glove. The Amateur Boxing Association of England recently ruled that all fighters had to...

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Funny story: Men with Beards Banned from looking at Babies

Men with Beards Banned from looking at Babies

Beards. The mere mention of the word sends shivers down the tender spines of every human baby from Albania to Zimbabwe. The sheer terror with which facial hair creates in the minds and souls of little babies cannot be fathomed - unless you are a b...

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Funny story: David Beckham's Beard To Join Notts County

David Beckham's Beard To Join Notts County

Mega bucks football club Notts County have signed David Beckham's beard in a bid to reach the premiership. Following the recent Sol Campbell fiasco the club have been looking for a big name signing. Beckham's beard could prove to be the perfect signi...

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Funny story: Fears grow over Keane beard return

Fears grow over Keane beard return

Concerns have recently arisen in East Anglia over a possible return to football for the beard of former Manchester United star Royston Maurice Keane, current manager of Ipswich Town. The beard, last seen when Keane's Sunderland side were soundly b...

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Funny story: Secret of Eternal Life Found in Archbishops Beard

Secret of Eternal Life Found in Archbishops Beard

Archbishop of Canterbury Rowan Williams was trying to halt rumours today that the secret of eternal life had been discovered nesting in his enormous wad of face fuzz by his local GP during a regular check up. "This allegation is ludicrous" he warb...

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Funny story: Britney Spears Concerned About Beard Growth

Britney Spears Concerned About Beard Growth

Hit me baby one more time! Ouch!!! - Reports coming out of Hollywood seem to suggest that Britney Spears is growing a beard. Louisianan Spears has recently been criticised for dressing up as a belly dancer in her shows, and having a belly. "She's...

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Funny story: Law Lords deport Abu Qatada because his beard is too long

Law Lords deport Abu Qatada because his beard is too long

Jordanian terrorist and beard fanatic Abu Qatada lost his appeal against deportation. In a unanimous decision, five Law Lords lambasted the length of the radical cleric's beard, saying that there was simply no room in the country for beards of that l…

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Funny story: Bearded Lady Also Had Hairy Balls

Bearded Lady Also Had Hairy Balls

A Bearded Lady performing in a circus based in the Midlands, revealed this week that her chin isn't the only thing to be covered in unsightly hair - she also has a healthy pair of hairy testicles! The secret was blown on Monday when, as the circus...

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Funny story: Man celebrates his weird beard

Man celebrates his weird beard

Spokane WA- Ryan Clayton, a typical 34-year old resident of Spokane, was alone on vacation backpacking through a dense secluded forest, eating peanut shells and licking tree bark, when he tripped over an ice sculpture built by prodigious beavers with...

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Funny story: Gordon Brown - 'Beard Tax On The Way'

Gordon Brown - 'Beard Tax On The Way'

WESTMINININSTER (Defecated News) - With recent polls indicating a clear win for Labour at a October general election, Gordon Brown yesterday introduced changes in tax law that could boost his popularity even more.

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