It all seemed so reasonably explainable for the Hawkins' 550 pound pig Larry. At first his dad suddenly disappeared with no warning as well as the 600 pound pig Isabella. "They eloped", Larry said to his self. "Yep, that's what happened, they eloped. Dad always had an eye for the really fat ones and Isabella made Rosie O'Donnell look like a super model". Then his mom was gone the next d...
Just to set the record straight, it was the oink, oink kind of pigs, not the human variety, that gathered in New York City's Grand Central Station last night to protest bacon soda, a new product now offered for sale online. Commuters were sta...
Imports of lean bacon from Scandinavia were suspended today as reports confirmed that the bacon was suffering from the Danish variant of swine flu. Three customers contacted the lead importer, when their bacon developed a high temperature and blis...
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Even as the World Health Organization struggles to contain a recent outbreak of swine flu, a startling number of other swine related diseases and illnesses have begun to crop up across the globe. "This latest development is esp...
LONDON, UK: The Health Ministry has issued more swine flu alerts and precautionary measures. The Health Secretary has said: "We are now asking Brits to avoid eating bacon butties - just to be on the safe side". A bitter Onslow Dole and his wife...
It's a rags to rags story that has left America stunned - one of it's greatest icons has admitted that he is bankrupt due to the recession that is gripping the world like a clenched fist around a teenage boys erect penis before his first wank. Ke...
West Berkshire Council today ran out of road salt for the roads around Newbury, and resorted to a novel solution - vehicles fitted with tyres made solely from bacon. 'The bacon ploughs have been designed to get through the toughest conditions,' sa...
The Atlanta Falcons' kicker, Morten Andersen, the NFL's all-time leading scorer, has retired at the age of 48, an early casualty of the Irish Pork Crisis. The Danish kicker, who scored 2,544 points in a 25-year career, played for Atlanta in the p...
Rogue Rabbi Rick Rickstein recently revealed reservations regarding one of the central beliefs of his religion. Rickstein, long time friend of Mel Brooks, admitted that "We could have been a bit hasty about the whole Jesus thing" Acknowledging tha...
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