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Funny satire stories about Athletics

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Funny story: Pig Wins Three Peaks Race

Pig Wins Three Peaks Race

Everyone knows how versatile an animal the pig is. He's very tasty, for a start, a very clean animal too, but also very intelligent. They make great pets, and if you train them they will even pick the kids up from school, leaving you to enjoy doing...

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Funny story: Famous Athlete Accused of Crime He'll Get Away With Anyway

Famous Athlete Accused of Crime He'll Get Away With Anyway

(October 28, 2010 -- Chicago, IL)...Breaking news out of Chicago has shocked the sports community today as a person really famous for their participation in professional athletics was accused of doing something not considered legal. The superstar at...

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Funny story: Nigerian Athlete Passes Drugs Test

Nigerian Athlete Passes Drugs Test

There was more controversy at the Commonwealth Games in Delhi earlier today when a Nigerian athlete was given the all-clear after a drugs test. This came after earlier news that Nigeria's 400m relay runner Folashade Abugan had failed a drugs test.

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Funny story: Commonwealth Games Latest: English Team Registers 'Catalogue Of Complaints'

Commonwealth Games Latest: English Team Registers 'Catalogue Of Complaints'

Complaints about the Commonwealth Games village in Delhi really started to get into gear this morning, after England's first batch of athletes moved into the much-criticised facility on Monday. The 48 competitors from the hockey, lawn bowls and sh...

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Funny story: New Athletics Challenge

New Athletics Challenge

As Athletics teams assemble in Delhi for the Commonwealth Games they realise that there are some extra competitions to deal with. First, crossing a bridge has been made into a new event for the steeplechase. The added excitement is that the bridge...

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Funny story: Stephen Hawking: God not responsible for athletic victories.

Stephen Hawking: God not responsible for athletic victories.

LONDON, U.K.-Renowned physicist Stephen Hawking makes a controversial claim in his new book The Grand Design that God is not in any way responsible for events transpiring in the world of athletics. Hawking's new theory argues that the failures or tri...

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Funny story: Linford Christie To Return To Athletics

Linford Christie To Return To Athletics

Linford Christie, better known in athletics circles as The Sausage Geezer, has announced that he is to return to the sport later this month, and expects to have gained full fitness in time for fans to see his enormous cock swinging on TV screens at t...

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Funny story: Naked Athlete Comes To Grief Hurdling Barbed Wire Fence

Naked Athlete Comes To Grief Hurdling Barbed Wire Fence

Disaster struck here for Naked World Cross Country Champion Lars VanDerGrootgroot as he attempted to leap over a barbed wire fence near Ripon in the final of the cross country race. Holding a clear lead of 59 seconds over his closest competitor, V...

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Funny story: Female Basketball Players Question New Guidlines That All Participants In Team Sports Must Wear Athletic Supporters

Female Basketball Players Question New Guidlines That All Participants In Team Sports Must Wear Athletic Supporters

Women's team sports players in basketball, volleyball, soccer, softball, and field hockey are upset about new NCAA guidelines that say that all participants in all team sports must wear athletic supporters (a.k.a. jockstraps). The guideline, known a...

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Funny story: Athletes Sex Tests: Nude Scanner to be used

Athletes Sex Tests: Nude Scanner to be used

It has been announced that all athletes who will be competing in future athletic events will undergo compulsory nude scanner tests. The testing is to prevent gender rows in future games. The scanner that will be used will be similar to the one...

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Funny story: South African Hermaphrodite Runner Caster Semenya To Step Up To Heavyweight Division

South African Hermaphrodite Runner Caster Semenya To Step Up To Heavyweight Division

Caster Semenya, the South African world 800m athletics champion, who is at the centre of the Athletics Hermaphrodite scandal, has told her trainer that she is preparing to quit the sport and to get into the boxing ring - as a Heavyweight world title...

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Funny story: South African Hermaphrodite Runner Pregnant With Hermaphrodite

South African Hermaphrodite Runner Pregnant With Hermaphrodite

Doctors at the centre of the South African Hermaphrodite case have revealed another twist in the already-boring tale of Caster Semenya, the 800m runner who is 'a bit of both' - she's up the duff! Semenya, 18, is expecting a child after penetrating...

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Funny story: South African Runner Hermaphrodite Is A Bit More Man Than Woman

South African Runner Hermaphrodite Is A Bit More Man Than Woman

Caster Semenya, the South African 800m she-man at the centre of the 'is she/isn't he' Hermaphrodite scandal, has been checked-out again by doctors, who now say that the runner is a little bit more man than woman. Semenya, who became the world cham...

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Funny story: South African Runner Crowned Hermaphrodite 800m World Champion

South African Runner Crowned Hermaphrodite 800m World Champion

South Africa's 800m world champion Caster Semenya has undergone gender tests that have concluded the 18-year-old is a Hermaphrodite, and has all the best qualities of both sexes, it has been revealed. The tests were undertaken just hours before s...

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Funny story: Usain Bolt could be banned for being Martian, fans claim racism

Usain Bolt could be banned for being Martian, fans claim racism

Berlin, Germany. Questions are being raised over humanness of Jamaican sprinter Usain Bolt after he set new world records in 100 and 200 meters track races last week. Bolt has been running with superhuman abilities, which has caused some physicia...

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Funny story: South African Crossdresser Runs 800 Meters with Penis Tucked!

South African Crossdresser Runs 800 Meters with Penis Tucked!

JOHANNESBURG, South Africa - South African officials have rallied behind a controversial new cross-dressing cross-trainer, who won the women's world 800 meters title shortly after he tucked his penis and genitals safely away from view. The runner...

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Funny story: Caster Semen-ya: all woman?

Caster Semen-ya: all woman?

Limpopo Province, South Africa - (Muscular Ass Mess): "So what if my daughter looks a bit like Frank Bruno? So does the First Lady of America but nobody's askin' to check her gonads!" Dork-Ass Semen-ya was speaking at a press conference after her...

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