Can't find, or can't afford a penis sheath? Follow these simple steps to make your own. All you need are a few tools, some string and a gourd. Gather your materials and find a clean, well lit area in which to work. This can get messy and you don't want to upset the missus...yet. Finding a gourd: You can always grow your own gourds for use as penis sheaths, but why wait? Trundle on down to the...
Researchers have placed reports on worldwide net websites about three boys in southwest Michigan who are exhibiting mammoth boners. The odd part of the story is that the reports do not come from sex researchers or even urologists but can be traced ex...
I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons: I do physical labour. I work at great depths. I plunge headfirst into everything I do. I do not get weekends or public holidays off. I work in a damp environment. I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation. I work in high temperatures. My work exposes me to contagious diseases. Sincerely,...
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - In a startling revelation, Rush Limbaugh has publicly announced that he prefers the world's largest penis to the world's largest vagina. "Look, folks," Limbaugh huffed on his show Monday. "I can't tell you how many times it's...
Astronauts have reported that the Great Wall of China is a man made structure that can be seen from outer space. The ancient thousands miles construction has held this unique honor since the beginning of men in space. But recent observations fro...
MANHATTAN, KS - Local FFOX affiliate KFFA has completed contract negotiations with Jess Wright, Jr. and Kitty Purrfect, a man with a normal sized penis and a woman with a normal sized vagina, respectively. Originally from Manhattan, Kansas, the pa...
Penis Sheaths are flying off the shelves after President Barrack Obama made a fashion statement of his own by showing up at one of his first cabinet meetings wearing nothing but. His stunned staffers quickly got their own sheaths and soon the look wa...
This evening, over a 'steady gallon' of the finest of ales Belgium has to offer, this TheSpoof.com writer gathered his reporting team on the set of upcoming movie 'Below Decks' in order to address the team's concerns that their leader had effectively...
The Penis Monologues, a sequel to the very popular and award winning The Vagina Monologues, is scheduled for a Friday evening opening on Broadway. The play has is about men and their relationship with their reproductive organs. All shows for the...
Seattle, Washington - Clifford Fillmore, tired of the shower room tauntings, decided to take matters into his own hands, literally. During group shower time in front of a bunch of horrified inmates, he sliced off his own penis. Paramedics where call...
Duke University, NC- After decades of research by sociologists, psychologists, statististions, anthropologists and astrologers it has been determined, without any doubt, that men with large penises live longer, happier, more satisfying and productive...
UNITED NATIONS - The United Nations International Research and Training Institute for the Advancement and Health of Slaughterhouse Workers Programme, has issued a report titled, "Size Matters". The study -- three years in the making, at a cost of $ 8...
It took quite a bit of courage for Freddie Hancock to get into the shower with all his teammates after the neighborhood donkey-basketball game for a local charity. "I thought I felt a pin prick when I bent over awhile ago!" yelled Billy Ray Johnso...
Silicone vaginas and penises, part of a new virtual reality package offered by Microsoft Corporation makes its debut this weekend, and CEO Bill Gates, as usual, is behind the state of the art hardware and software for the game experience. Said to...
Google Earth has enabled many onlookers to get googlely eyed about the earth. Giles Cocknbull used Google earth to watch his girlfriend Hortensia mow the lawn of her neighbor, Bull Meacham. Virtual hikes of the Grand canyon, make believe climbs of Ev...
Rapper Kayne West has startled fans by claiming the Barbadian vixen Rihanna made off with his penis after a sensual rendevous in an overhead locker on a flight to Minsk. The two were planning to shoot their new documentary, a gritty look into the...
Reuters (Davos, Switzeland - February 3, 2009) World leaders recently compared the sizes of their 'stimulus packages' at the world economic forum in Davos. President Barack Obama yesterday revealed his 'massive stimulus package' before a shocked...
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