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Funny satire stories about Death

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Funny story: I Want To See My Daughters Cry.

I Want To See My Daughters Cry.

I want to see my daughters cry. I want to look down, across my chest, and see them surrounding my deathbed, staring at me, crying. I am preoccupied with my death. I had children so late; I was 38 when my oldest daughter was born. I am 41 years older than my youngest, and 14 years older than my wife. I constantly feel like the grandfather playing daddy, a father and husband a generation older th...

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Funny story: Shower Cleaner Goes Beserk

Shower Cleaner Goes Beserk

An article in Better Homes and Garden in the November Holiday issue tells of the ordeal of Harold Hooper, who, when, while taking a shower, was viciously attacked by his automatic shower cleaner which went berserk and almost drowned him. It was ju...

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Funny story: Dead US man arrested?

Dead US man arrested?

"Is there life after death" was the question asked when police arrested a "dead man" who officially died 12 years ago. US police officers thought about asking the X Files Bureau for help but they declined to investigate, the case was just too Alie...

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Funny story: British tourists missing, feared dead in Australia

British tourists missing, feared dead in Australia

A young British potato farmer and his book keeper wife are missing in Australia. Police fear they may be dead. The couple's Australian-based uncle, Sidney Bollocks, is helping police with their investigation. The couple, who disappeared into the b...

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Funny story: Walking Dead Consume Lindsay Lohan

Walking Dead Consume Lindsay Lohan

Lindsay Lohan. The girl interrupted, the girl with the restraining anklet, the girl still in rehab trying to get her life back together was finally consumed and eaten by the Walking Dead this afternoon. Dina and Michael Lohan, supposedly Lindsay...

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Funny story: Super-Healthy Surfer Andy Irons Drops Dead at 32

Super-Healthy Surfer Andy Irons Drops Dead at 32

Forty-seven-time surfing world champion Andy Irons' super-fit, super-healthy body stopped working and achieved room temperature on his way back home from a surfing event in Puerto Rico. The 32-year-old missed a portion of the competition at the od...

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Funny story: The Dangers of a Powerful Government

The Dangers of a Powerful Government

An apology was issued for the experiment conducted by United States public health researchers in Guatemala between 1946 and 1948. The United States purposely infected 1500 people with sexually transmitted diseases to study the effects of penicill...

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Funny story: World Leaders Mourn The Death Of Kzabrekistan President

World Leaders Mourn The Death Of Kzabrekistan President

Yuri Klyzuski's sudden death this morning has caused a shock wave to go all around the world as leader after leader paid tribute to a man who pulled his country from poverty to one of the nicest places to live and visit in eastern Europe. Accordin...

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Funny story: British pilot killed in bizarre plane crash

British pilot killed in bizarre plane crash

A British pilot, his Belgian co-pilot and 19 passengers have been killed, after a plane crashed in somewhat bizarre circumstances. The sole survivor of the crash, Arthur Skydiver, told authorities the unlikely series of events which had unfolded.

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Funny story: Joe Girardi hires psychic to channel Billy Martin

Joe Girardi hires psychic to channel Billy Martin

A self described "psychic concierge" name Madam Zorba, claims that Yankee skipper Joe Girardi has hired her to channel the spirit of Billy Martin. "Normally, I don't discuss the work I do for clients, but I'm a Red Sox fan, so in this case I'll m...

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Funny story: London Borough Promotes Body Composting

London Borough Promotes Body Composting

A large London borough is to encourage residents to compost the dead bodies of relatives at home instead of sending them for burial or cremation. The council cemetery is full and burning bodies creates large amounts of carbon dioxide which 'the Lo...

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Funny story: Daily Mail: OK, we lied.

Daily Mail: OK, we lied.

A massive first for the Daily Mail, who recently published an article which will cause more controversy than Justin Beiber. As it turns out, we're not going to die after all. Risks of cancer are totally fake. There will be no R2D2 virus. As it tur...

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Funny story: War link to death

War link to death

An official report has shown a definite link between the deaths of tens of thousands of people in Afghanistan and Iraq and war. The Sherlock Higher Institute of Thought based in the French town of Sansmerde published their surprising conclusion on...

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Funny story: Norman Wisdom Death Prompts Albania State Of Emergency

Norman Wisdom Death Prompts Albania State Of Emergency

A state of emergency has been declared in Albania this morning after it was announced that the country's favourite adopted son, British comedian Sir Norman Wisdom, had died at the age of 95. Wisdom, real name, Norman Pitkin, passed away peacefully...

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Funny story: Man killed by Intransigence

Man killed by Intransigence

Bank teller Kevin Smally has died of intransigence following a recent raid on HS Natleys bank. He had been busy sharpening pencils for the manager when an armed gang stormed the High St branch. One of the raiders demanded cash from Mr Smally who r...

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Funny story: Government Law to Recycle Graves

Government Law to Recycle Graves

The shortage of land for cemeteries has become so acute the Government has now passed a law which allows councils to clear out the bones from any grave where the person was buried over 100 years ago and re-use it. Anyone buried in a re-cycled grave w...

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Funny story: Owner of Segway Dies Leaving Behind Mystery Vehicle Unrevealed!

Owner of Segway Dies Leaving Behind Mystery Vehicle Unrevealed!

The owner of the Segway company, James Heselden, has passed, apparently in an accident involving a yet to be named experimental vehicle, known only as X33. The body of James Heselden was pulled from a River in England on Sunday. A Segway-type veh...

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