Inspired by Skoob's recent top 10 list. A tribute to mature males in long standing relationships across the globe. We've all been there. Semper Fi, brothers. Top 10 Things a Wife Can Do to Wreck a Boner 10: Show up naked, but without a cold beer in hand. 9: Start calling my penis any demeaning pet name as a metaphor for size. "My little Minnow", "Purple Smurf", "Mini Me", or "Tin...
1 - When you're properly nutted, tell her about the girl that you were really in love with when you were 19. Tell her about how fate tore your burgeoning relationship asunder before it ever really got going. Tell her you'll always have a special place in your heart for that girl. 2 - Watch a really violent, semi-pornographic movie on the TV with the sound cranked right up. Tell her you're only...
The Top 23 Punk Rock Groups That Never Made It Big Time: 23. Pudding On The Pants 22. ESAD Speedwagon 21. Mr. Hyde's Hoedown 20. Fit As A Fondle 19. Casket Case 18. Pickle Disease 17. Rubber Up! 16. The Scissors Runners 15. Shit For Brains 14. Best Way To Kill 13. Gary & The Goober Grabbers 12. Time Of The Month Spotting 11. Groin Bald 10. The Fuzz Bu...
To properly fit in to a bureaucracy, a worker needs to ensure that he/she does no more than the bare minimum of work that is required. Such an approach will allow you to more easily follow the five paradigms of government, keep you from upsetting your co-workers, and provide proper evidence of your suitability for promotion in the future. In the event that some misguided employee questions your ap...
The Top 20 Most Borrowed Nudist Books From The World's Most Interesting Man, Fernando Monte Verde's Library (Usually kept at the mansion of Fernando Monte Verde, but these are kept for guests aboard his yacht, The Conquest. They are all first editions and signed by the authors.) 20. The Bobbitt 19. Pride & Pecker, Just 18. Lord Of The Penis Rings 17. Wee Willie's Wanker 16.
Appdict - Addicted to using iPhone apps in inappropriate situations. Badge Doubt - The feeling that any badge or security ID shown to you is fake. Fib Blab - Private nickname conservative talk-radio hosts give to their own programs. Flu Reject - Person who does not qualify for any of the official categories of people who are advised to get an H1N1 flu vaccination. Newslech - Male w...
Top Twelve New Bioengineering Project That Are Almost Ready! 12. Octopus that can change race car tires two at a time! 11. Popcorn kernels that can not only pop but poop out caramel covering. 10. Carrot that can do a really authentic sounding Elvis imitation. 9. Poker Playing Prairie Dogs that can also play the tuba, washboard and accordion! 8. A skunk that when flattened on the hig...
Submitted by an international pool of pub crawlers, the top 10 suggestions for things "Not To Do" when drinking were compiled by the beverage industry's flagship magazine called the "Gig and Vomit". Listed in reverse voting order from tenth place to first are the following suggestions compiled from both men and women. 10: Never wear white pants (or skirt): You may need to crawl across a dirty...
Wrong Songs To Play On Your Wedding Night, Top 12 12. Limp 11. Pieces Of April 10. Mr. Big Stuff 9. Love Hurts 8. Come Back When You Grow Up Girl (Ky. Only) 7. Love Comes Quickly 6. I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For 5. Over, Under, Sideways, Down 4. Break On Through To The Other Side 3. Psychotic Reaction 2. Mama To...
11> "What do you mean, talk to the hand?" 10> "Just pretend it's a 1979 Atari joystick and the game is "The Invasion Of The Giant Lips!" 9. "If I eat a lot of honey first, it'll be just like those creamy center long johns that you like so much." 8> "Sugar Tongue..uh, Plum, I was thinking: you know how you relish footlong hot dogs?" 7> "So, a new sofa it is!" 6> "No S...
After deciding to call the new football bowl game in Lexington, Kentucky The Horsehead Bowl, TheSpoof has collected the runner-ups: 12. The Shirts/Skins Bowl 11. The Rush LimBowl 10. The Manute Bowl 9. The Luke Duke $ Bowl 8. The Balls Cup Bowl 7. The Vince Lombardi Ashes Bowl 6. The Racehorse Old Stew Bowl 5. The Steroid Ass-Shot Bowl 4. The Thundercup Chamberpot...
12. Every single shopper at WallyMart: Skinny as a rail! 11. You hear footsteps on the street behind you but when you turn around, not only is no one there but something gooses you in the ass! 10. Every station on the radio has Alice Cooper as it's host. 9. Complete quiet at the local library except occassional cry of "BRAINS!" 8. When interviewing for a job at Micky D's, the boss man...
12. There's a lot or Rrrrrrr's in his speech: "What say we go to Arrrrrrrby's tonight?" 11. Orders pizza and runs to pay for it from "me bounty". 10. Just before you jump from the high dive, you thought you felt the end of a cutlass upon your back. 9. "Let's take arrrr food out of the kitchen and eat on the poopdeck." 8. Even the slightest breeze seems to shiver his timbers. 7. T...
Top 12 Acronyms You Might Want To Avoid In The Personal Ads: 12. NQACARO (Not quite as cute as Rosie O'Donnell) 11. POTRPFC (President of the Roman Polanski Fan Club) 10. GTBWWW (Got that Bush way with words) 9. MMM (Macarena! Macarena! Macarena!) 8. FCWGGTPIHF) Former clown with great gags to pull, including his finger) 7. SBWTSE (Susan Boyle Without The Sexy Eyebrows) 6.
Although not a bad musician among them, these guys need, or needed, a name change in order to get a bigger audience: 13. Little "Red-Nosed" Johnson 12. Howie "TB Hocker" Jefferson 11. Big Harry The Pianist 10. Alex "The Booger-Woogie" Flinger 9. Barney "Stinky Ass" Baldwin 8. Henry "Happy-Go-Lucky" Sunshine 7. Al "Polar Ice Melting" Gore 6. Andy "The Root Cellar" Crackh...
1. Asian ladies know that they are superior to mere men in all facets of life and expect to be treated accordingly. 2. Asian ladies do not want equality; they demand control. 3. Asian ladies have femininity in spades. They know all the tricks and enjoy using them. A passing smile can reduce a man to a blithering idiot in nanoseconds. 4. Asian ladies pay a lot of attention to their appeara...
* Antibiotics don't work anymore, with the swine flu and advanced bacteria. * The internet is so lag-filled that it's quicker carving your calculations. * Horse-drawn carts are cheaper to run than wormholes. * The Spoof! is making satirical articles that madden people in living in caves. * There are so many enviromental laws we have to live in caves to obey them. * People are becoming so para...
Get Spoof News in your email inbox!
We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.
