The scientific community was rocked yesterday by claims that the world may not revolve around the sun as previously thought and may in fact revolve around two-year-old Molly Jones from Little Clarendon Street, Oxford. Professor David Jones of Oxfo...
Professor McNerdy, concluding a 30-year study on the composition of bitterness, hate and spite, has discovered that revenge is sweet as lollipops. Working from his local laboratory, Prof. McNerdy carefully selected test subjects Mary and Tom (name...
The International Union of Pure and Applied Chemistry (IUPAC) added copernicum to its list of officially-recognized elements this week. Element number 112, previously named ununbium, was given a permanent title after seven months of debate. Whi...
Scientists in the US have openly scorned film-makers for using too much fantasy in their blockbuster films (dunno what they're on about??). Aliens, Jaws, Armageddon, Pirates of the Caribbean, The Titanic, King Kong, etc, have too much fantasy in t...
The same scientist who came up with the remarkable observation that bees cannot fly because they are aerodynamically unstable, despite all evidence to the contrary, has now declared that planes too cannot fly. "It's perfectly simple," said Valdima...
Geneticists have discovered a new mutated gene that seems to be only found in Managers and Supervisors of small and large businesses. The gene has been dubbed JRK-H1N1, and according to research causes a disconnection from other humans and a pre-ten...
Accra, Ghana - It has recently been determined by Professor M'buku of the Ghana Community College of Cosmetology that Pi actually does repeat itself. Using seventeen hundred TRS-80 computers (16K of RAM whether you need it or not) working in tandem f...
NUTLEY, NJ - Scientists in Nutley (nothing to do with nuts, although it is reported that Martha Stewart is from Nutley) at a secret government location released startling news today that seemed to be ridicules on the face of it: 'Early animals wer...
This'snotta Seekrtbunkersport, SD - Almost 200 miles in a random direction from a small town built to look really old and unimportant, a child who may be the greatest thinker the world has ever known is kept hidden away from prying eyes, solid foods,...
Secaucus NJ: The Hoboken Institute of Standards Technology (HIST) has released the latest political and pop culture measurement units. HIST updates this list every 10 years to keep up with the happenings in Washington DC and Hollywood. For those readers not familiar with such a list here is an example; 1 Hitler is the absolute measurement of evil in the world, thus a number of milli or micro Hi...
Prostoglandin works! Niaciorhombohydrehide is effective at reducing wrinkles! Say goodbye to laughter lines with strepttidiaorrhoic alimintary gum extract! You may not be able to find these compounds in chemical textbooks, but the beauty ind...
HIAWASSEE,GA--A Towns County Pentecostal preacher shot and critically injured a Nobel Prize Laureate in Paleobiology early Friday morning, claiming the man was the "Biblical Antichrist." Arrested, while holding the smoking deer rifle, was Bishop...
A scientist has stunned the World with his announcement that most of the people alive this very moment will be dead come 2255. "Governments around the World are not prepared for all these deaths. I'm as serious as cancer when I say rhythm is a da...
That's the question a group of scientists are asking after observing a particular colony of ants "working their little asses off" day after day just outside their offices next to the main sidewalk. Dr. Jeff Dunkirk, lead entomologist in the new st...
Michael Jackson's final request before he "Beat It" was that his body should be left to science. However, for the first time ever in its thoudand-year history, science today rejected a bequeathed body when it turned Jackson's body away at the gate...
Scientists have made a major breakthrough by creating human sperm. However, the claim is not without some controversy. Critics have claimed that it is not genuine human sperm and there are also those who believe that scientists should leave well alon...
Scientists today revealed that a Premiership footballer has grown a brain. As yet the player in question has not been named. It is believed that the experiment was carried out to see if unintelligent life could be used to support intelligent life.
Get Spoof News in your email inbox!
We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.
