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Funny satire stories about John McCain

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Funny story: Ford Motor Company Fights McCain / Palin Over Maverick Claim

Ford Motor Company Fights McCain / Palin Over Maverick Claim

Detroit MI - In a striking turn-around, Ford has reclaimed ownership of the one and only TRUE "Maverick" title and will fight the McCain campaign all the way to the supreme court if necessary to prove it. "Sure, McCain is old, rusty, worn out and...

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Funny story: McCain to have a elephantoplasty procedure

McCain to have a elephantoplasty procedure

Doctors have successfully convinced the Republican Presidential candidate John McCain that he requires a radical elephantoplasty procedure to offset his otherwise aging visage. The operation, in which prominent elephant appendages are surgically...

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Funny story: McCain Admits: I Only Picked Her To Win!

McCain Admits: I Only Picked Her To Win!

John McCain who has sometimes shown himself to be an honest John explained that his real motive for picking her was so he could be a winner. McCain begged America to understand. He told them about his hard life in an unaffectionate military home...

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Funny story: Joe Biden Steps Down as Democratic Vice Presidential Nominee and Will Support John McCain Presidency

Joe Biden Steps Down as Democratic Vice Presidential Nominee and Will Support John McCain Presidency

St. Louis, MO-Democratic Vice President nominee Joe Biden announced today that he would be stepping down as the Vice President nominee for the 2008 presidential election and would become a Republican . "After tonight's debate with Sarah Palin I...

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Funny story: McCain Crashes His Campaign into a Tree

McCain Crashes His Campaign into a Tree

After temporarily suspending his campaign in order to address the economic crisis, McCain reportedly started it back up and promptly crashed it into a tree. "The Senator is pretty banged up," said a spokesman, "but he's resting comfortably while...

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Funny story: The Last Presidential Debate of 2008

The Last Presidential Debate of 2008

Monday, November 3, 2008. Day before the 56th consecutive quadrennial United States presidential election. John McCain and Barack Obama are neck-to-neck in the polls. They'd agreed to have one last debate, make their case before the American people go out to vote. Looking amiable, the two men shake hands, but their backs are erect, arms rigid, robot like. Tom Brokaw clears his throat and...

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Funny story: Seven Reasons Why McCain Won't be President

Seven Reasons Why McCain Won't be President

1. Palin. She can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan and never let the First Dude forget he's the man, but when it comes to the Russians, Iranians and their nukes? Hmm. I don't know. 2. He's not very colorful. He never fathered a black child out of wedlock and his Vietnam days didn't make him mentally unstable. Boring! 3. He's forgetful. Says he opposes...

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Funny story: McCain's a Dem Hag

McCain's a Dem Hag

It wasn't long ago that the Republican Party (Senator McCain included) endorsed every bill put before it by the Bush administration. Those days are long gone. American taxpayers woke up one day and felt their wallets lighter, slimmer. The cost...

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Funny story: McCain Crashes Navy Plane into Pirate Ship Near Mozambique!

McCain Crashes Navy Plane into Pirate Ship Near Mozambique!

The pirates off East African shores have been a constant threat to safety on the high seas. Recently they ship-jack a arms laden boat and fled with the deadly cargo. That is until Navy veteran John McCain found out. Right after abandoning his c...

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Funny story: Dow Drops 666; McCain Claims Obama is the Anti-Christ!

Dow Drops 666; McCain Claims Obama is the Anti-Christ!

Elder statesman McCain and his Christian Fundie running mate Sarah Palin accused Barack Obama of being the Anti- Christ who is ushering in the end times and the Battle of Armageddon. The evidence offered by the Republicans was the 666 points the...

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Funny story: McCain Team Demands Eleventh-hour Concessions in VP Debate

McCain Team Demands Eleventh-hour Concessions in VP Debate

Representatives from John McCain's campaign have given the Commission on Presidential Debates (CPD) a list of demands related to the debate scheduled for this Thursday evening. Democrats angrily responded by claiming the maneuver was a blatant at...

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Funny story: Ron Paul Finally Concedes Republican Nomination

Ron Paul Finally Concedes Republican Nomination

Texas Congressman Ron Paul finally conceded the Republican Nomination to Senator John McCain, six weeks after his party's national convention. Paul was the first man to enter the race and is apparently also the last to leave. Even when McCain sec...

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Funny story: McCain Insists That Three Inches is Really Significant!

McCain Insists That Three Inches is Really Significant!

White man John McCain has reportedly been living in fear of facing a black opponent due to his old fashioned belief in the superior physical endowment of men of African descent. This may account for his rather bizarre insistence in the first debate t...

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Funny story: Repub Candie McPatton Tries to Swagger through First Debate Aboard Tank with Pearl Handled Revolvers!

Repub Candie McPatton Tries to Swagger through First Debate Aboard Tank with Pearl Handled Revolvers!

When Repub Prez candie John McCain could not duck the first debate, after a note from his mother was identified as a fraud, he showed up in a tank as psychopath and Four Star General George Patton doing a bad impersonation of George C Scott! McPa...

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Funny story: Polls Show Obama's Lack of Financial Experience Beats McCain's Lack of Financial Experience

Polls Show Obama's Lack of Financial Experience Beats McCain's Lack of Financial Experience

In the midst of the recent problems on Wall Street, Barack Obama has experienced a surge in the polls. America, it seems, feels more comfortable with Obama than John Mccain when it comes to handling a financial crisis. "I definitely will be vot...

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Funny story: McCain Wants to Replace Debates with : Drill, Baby, Drill the VP Contest!

McCain Wants to Replace Debates with : Drill, Baby, Drill the VP Contest!

As the Republicant delegates defied all ecological wisdom and feverishly chanted "Drill, Baby Drill" like psychopaths out of There Will Be Blood, John McCain got an idea. Knowing that the senile inarticulate ass would be badly whupped by the erud...

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Funny story: Sarah Palin To Have Brazilian Wax Live On Air

Sarah Palin To Have Brazilian Wax Live On Air

Republican Party potential VP candidate Sarah Palin did it again in the glare of the cameras today when she announced to the world that she is to have a Brazilian Wax. The Alaskan governor knows how to milk the media, and this latest stunt is sure...

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