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Funny satire stories about Cats

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Funny story: Gaping pussy whisperer has jaw put back

Gaping pussy whisperer has jaw put back

Locally famous 'Pussy Whisperer' Smitch Cumstein of County County, Idaho, Nebraska yesterday had his jaw relocated after it was swiped by 'Toot Toot', a 2 year old Siamese three legged cat of minor proportions, but an excellent Forward Defensive Stro...

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Funny story: Cats May Have Killed Woman

Cats May Have Killed Woman

A 72-year-old man who, police had alleged, confessed to his cats that he had bludgeoned his partner to death, has been cleared of murder after his defence lawyers claimed the cats did it.

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Funny story: 'Cat confession' man not guilty; cats Twinkie and Pudsey charged with perjury, conspiracy

'Cat confession' man not guilty; cats Twinkie and Pudsey charged with perjury, conspiracy

A 92-year-old man who confessed to his cats has been cleared of murder.

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Funny story: Cats Found to be Clean-Burning Fossil Fuel Alternative

Cats Found to be Clean-Burning Fossil Fuel Alternative

Egypt - Scientists in Egypt working on the creation of a synthetic, clean burning fuel to replace fossil fuels in aid of reversing global warming discovered a solution after accidentally set fire to one of the laboratory's pet cats. They found t...

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Funny story: 9/10 Cats Dislike Jimmy Carr

9/10 Cats Dislike Jimmy Carr

Jimmy Carr was announced as one of the hated men alive in a poll of wild urban cats. They believe that his TV show 9/10 cats is insulting and derogatory. Carr was unavailable for comment yesterday but was said to be in a cat-astrophic state of despai...

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Funny story: Death Of Girlfriend's Cat Thrills Local Man

Death Of Girlfriend's Cat Thrills Local Man

When Diane Barber's nine-year-old cat Jesse passed away from a kidney infection last week, her boyfriend Tim Chambers supported her in her grief but in secret couldn't be happier the miserable thing is finally dead.

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Funny story: California Students In Trouble For Eating Pussy

California Students In Trouble For Eating Pussy

High school students at a Southern California private school are in trouble with the local law enforecement officials and the school board. Thirty teenagers at the Chang Ki Check High School in San Diego face charges for violating both local law and...

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Funny story: Pets Able to Speak Human Languages

Pets Able to Speak Human Languages

Melbourne, Florida (IPP) - A science team composed of a brother and sister who specialize in animal behavior have made an astounding discovery about how animals behave outside the presence of their human masters.

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Funny story: RSPCA Flood Warnings After Deluge of Cats and Dogs

RSPCA Flood Warnings After Deluge of Cats and Dogs

The RSPCA has today issued flood warnings after reports started pouring in from all over Britain that it's actually raining cats and dogs.

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Funny story: The Animal Planet produces new show "Hairball"

The Animal Planet produces new show "Hairball"

Hollywood, Ca. - In the tradition of MSNBC's "Hardball", the Animal Planet has produced a new talk show due out this winter, called "Hairball".

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Funny story: Global warming causes cat population explosion; kittens being born due to late-season breeding -- thanks balmy weather!

Global warming causes cat population explosion; kittens being born due to late-season breeding -- thanks balmy weather!

Seattle, Washington - Pussies are getting all hot and bothered resulting in an extension of the mating season that usually ends by October before starting up again in April. However, due to the balmy weather, cats are knocking their mittens and havin...

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Funny story: Child Admits Indifference to Kitten

Child Admits Indifference to Kitten

Little Timmy Jonber of Cedar Rapids, Iowa was somewhat relieved that his presumed lost kitten showed up at this home earlier this week.

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Funny story: Crazed Catnip Criminal on the Loose

Crazed Catnip Criminal on the Loose

Miami-- (AP) -- Drug crazed criminals have reached a new low in south Florida, where a bizarre and heinous crime took place today. A security camera captured the brazen robbery of a defenseless kitten, apparently for it's catnip.

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Funny story: Cuddle Cat - The Most Famous Cat in Quantum Physics

Cuddle Cat - The Most Famous Cat in Quantum Physics

If we learn something new everyday - then today we may potentially learn everything. The "Theory of Everything" (TOE) is now out of the bag - or more accurately out of the box...all thanks to a mangey feline called Cuddle Cat.

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Funny story: Spying fruit flies developed

Spying fruit flies developed

Shortly after the University of Tokyo announced it had created remote-controlled cockroaches in 1997, the Hollywood blockbuster film "Fifth Element" depi...

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Funny story: Party animal pussy

Party animal pussy

Sydney, Austalia - (Ass Mess): Following earlier reports this week that pussy is high up on Australians' menu preferences these days a Sydney newspaper has featured a story about a cocaine-crazed pussy that survived its owners' long lost week...

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Funny story: Pussy on the menu amid Ozzie cathouse blues

Pussy on the menu amid Ozzie cathouse blues

Sydney, Australia - (AssMess): Australian brothel madams are up in arms at being blamed for a spate of barbecued feral cat feasting after OzMan-Hustler magazine published attitudinal survey results claiming that eating roasted wild pussy wa...

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