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Funny satire stories about Football (Soccer)

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Funny story: Scotland's new national soccer manager must be red haired, have freckles and wear a kilt!

Scotland's new national soccer manager must be red haired, have freckles and wear a kilt!

After sacking their national soccer manager George Burley, Scotland have had enough of "Anglo-cised" managers constantly cocking it up. The new search criteria is as follows: 1) He must be red-haired and have ginger freckles! 2) He must wea...

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Funny story: Minute's silence held at Anfield today for the death of Sarah MacNamara's budgie

Minute's silence held at Anfield today for the death of Sarah MacNamara's budgie

As no football matches are now played in Britain without a minute's silence being held before them, for the death of somebody or other who had no connection with the matches or clubs involved in those matches, today a silence in memory of the tragic...

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Funny story: Brazil 0 England 1, Kaka crossed his chest in vain and God fell asleep!

Brazil 0 England 1, Kaka crossed his chest in vain and God fell asleep!

Brazilian and English superstar footballers put on a show and millions of bored, more bored, very bored fans all fell asleep! Capellos decimated team playing at half pace in the searing heat of Daho failed to beat the Brazilian cracks and to be pe...

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Funny story: Rival Football Fans At A Loss To Explain Hatred Of Eachother

Rival Football Fans At A Loss To Explain Hatred Of Eachother

The footballing world was brought to a near standstill today, as rookie journalist Anthony Abdul Gonzales dared ask a question that is seldom ever talked about. Why do rival football fans hate each other? Interviewing a special panel of supporters...

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Funny story: N'Gog: I was framed

N'Gog: I was framed

David N'Gog and Rafa Benitez have finally spoken out on last nights diving debacle against Birmingham City. Liverpool's young French foward has claimed there is a conspiracy against him. "There were 45,000 fans there, and viewers from across th...

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Funny story: Football's Offside Rule altered

Football's Offside Rule altered

The offside rule in football, which nobody has ever fully understood no matter how many times it has been explained to them, was changed today, and first came into effect at the crucial match between Chelsea and their visitors Manchester United. P...

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Funny story: Americans change rules of football - in America

Americans change rules of football - in America

As the people of the mightiest country in the world are hopeless at winning team sports that other countries across the world play at and win, the rules of association football in the USA were today changed to suit American men playing it. Firstly...

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Funny story: Royal mail to be sued over Postal Strike

Royal mail to be sued over Postal Strike

The Royal Mail is to be sued over the postal strike. The law suit is to be brought by Dentist, Optitions, lawyers, Doctors and Hairdressers who say they were forced to use the phone more whilst the posties were on strike. They say that instead...

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Funny story: Torres: I'm Prettier Than Drogba

Torres: I'm Prettier Than Drogba

Liverpool pretty boy Fernando Torres has responded to remarks made by Didier Drogba, that come May the two will be very close at the top of the scoring charts. While Torres refused to deny this, he had a wholly different system of determining who is...

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Funny story: Fernando Caceres Attackers To Be Turned Into Corned Beef

Fernando Caceres Attackers To Be Turned Into Corned Beef

News is just emerging from Argentina that police hunting the vicious attackers of fomer Argentina footballing hero Fernando Caceres, have said that the culprits, when captured, will be turned into prime South American corned beef. Snr. Caceres, 40...

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Funny story: Authorities set to vote on new football rules

Authorities set to vote on new football rules

Footballs Governing bodies are considering plans to make drastic alterations to footballing rules, in an attempt to make it as exciting, modern and profitable as it has ever been. Ideas that have been mooted include having substitute referees, tha...

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Funny story: Glazer family deny Stamford Bridge renaming rumours

Glazer family deny Stamford Bridge renaming rumours

Solicitors in Carson City, Wyoming, acting on behalf of Malcolm Glazer, American owner of Manchester United FC today issued a strongly worded rebuttal about rumours circulating on the internet. The Glazer family would like to make it known that th...

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Funny story: Wenger: "I was right to sell all my best players"

Wenger: "I was right to sell all my best players"

Arsenal Manager Arsene Wenger has refuted suggestions that his teams failure to capture a trophy in almost five years is a direct result of the sale of all of his best players. "I do not think this was a wrong move. Not winning a trophy in this lo...

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Funny story: Wenger: "We Are The Best Team in The World"

Wenger: "We Are The Best Team in The World"

Arsenal Coach Arsene Wenger was full of praise for his players and club, ahead of his teams weekend fixture at Wolves. "Just because I say Van Persie is the best striker in the premiership at the moment, does not mean all our other players aren't...

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Funny story: Ferguson complains of "squeeky bum"

Ferguson complains of "squeeky bum"

Sir Alex Ferguson's famously coined catch-phrase may have come back to haunt him ahead of his teams much anticipated match at Stamford Bridge this weekend. Often intended to denote a nervous time or period of the season for one or more football te...

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Funny story: Fabregas - "Make an honest woman out of me"

Fabregas - "Make an honest woman out of me"

Arsenal Captain Cesc Fabregas sent a chilling ultimatum to his Manager, Arsene Wenger, by claiming the French man has 48 hours to make an honest woman of him, or he will find a manager that will. "Frankly, I am sick of this. I feel the last 5 year...

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Funny story: Rafa to consider player/manager role at Pool

Rafa to consider player/manager role at Pool

There was no shortage of drama today, ahead of this evenings champions league fixtures. Liverpool Manager Rafa Benitez claimed he could return to the playing field if the current form of his side does not improve. "I knew we were lacking depth. Wi...

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