ROBUST, Ind. - A trio of snails thought by most scientists and laymen to be extinct has been rediscovered in the Coosa and Cahaba rivers, according to reports from the Coosa and Cahaba rivers.
NOMOKE, Oregon - Scientists say they have found a giant planet orbiting a distant star. One astronomer figures the planet is five times the mass of Jupiter, at least.
PIXY TWADDLE GAZETTE -- Long time staunch proponent of virgin births, talking shrubbery and literate livestock, Richard Noggin, part time sessional lecturer at Confused Christian Scientists for Stasis Community College and senior pastor for the congr...
In an animal testing facility on the outskirts of the city of Memphis, Tennessee - scientists were alarmed by the sudden rapid growth of a certain breed of iguana after being fed a considerable amount of birth-control pills.
A team of scientists from India have discovered what could possibly be the most shocking story ever heard. These scientist have discovered a code in the bible that has unlocked Jesus's Freestyle rappings.
Stunned scientists are reporting today that pop star Michael Jackson has been discovered to have a very rare immunity to flesh-eating bacteria.
MIAMI, FLORIDA - Scientists from all over the world have gathered in Florida this week to study the age-old question: Is a frog's ass water tight?...
New York, New York--For many years, scientists have been seeking the one universal substance that would be most useful in a variety of everyday as well as critical situations. Now, a team of researchers at several prominent New York city-area hospit...
A recent study indicates that millions of obese Americans could achieve significant weight loss if they could only overcome their fear of sharks. Scientists report that subjects on the "Shark Attack Diet" lost up to 40 pounds in a single treatment.
"The Princess is dead long live the Princess"...
New York, NY--Scientists at a major teaching hospital here today reported not one but two scientific findings that they hope will propel them to the front of the line for a Nobel Prize and provide them with lifetime free tickets to Lincoln Center.
Detroit, Michigan - Scientists have created a new hybrid car that runs, for the most part, on the fumes emitted when human beings lie or bullshit.
OAHU, HAWAII - Reversing the widely accepted view that the Big Bang created the universe, some 10 to 20 billion years ago, astrophysists now believe that the Big Bang actually destroyed the universe, some 10 to 20 billion years ago.
The Government of the United Kingdom has officially passed a bill to ban ageing of U.K. citizens. This follows an extensive study, (conducted by eminent scientists and endorsed today by the treasury) into what they described as the greatest cause of...
The discovery of a skeleton of a man barely one meter tall who hunted pygmy elephants and giant hamsters 18,000 years ago could rewrite the origins of humanity, scientists in United States said Thursday.
Revelations concerning Democratic presidential nominee, Senator John Kerry, are starting to pour in as the elections draw near. In Idaho scientists confirm that the Kerry family are descended from CHINpanzees and not apes that learned to walk erect.
American authorities were facing a race against the clock in their audacious bid, to transfer Mount St Helens to Florida before it erupted. With earthquakes and other nasties already underway, geological survey scientists believed there was no time t...
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