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Funny story: Swiss Guard ordered to check if altar boys are going commando

Swiss Guard ordered to check if altar boys are going commando

Rome - (Papa Bullshit): In Old Testament days it used to be called loincloth shunning. And this weekend it's really got up the Pope's nose as the relentless Italian heatwave continues to fry the Papal bollox - er...brain! - to oblivion. An ann...

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Funny story: Pope orders all clergy to undergo emergency 'dung seat' exam

Pope orders all clergy to undergo emergency 'dung seat' exam

London - (Sacriledge News): The immediate return of the sella stercoraria - or dung seat - test has been ordered by Pope Joe Ratzinger. Stung by a Vatican Internal Affairs probe naming 'literally hundreds' of covert women priests and bishops masqu...

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Funny story: Pope Says "Yes" to Gay Marriages

Pope Says "Yes" to Gay Marriages

Pope Benedict XVI announced today that gay marriage is okay. He is changing the Roman Catholic Church's homophobic stance on gay marriage, and allowing priest to now marry gay couples. "I looked at what it meant to be a priest, and I realized...

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Funny story: Paedo Polanski free after Pope sends Swiss judge glowing reference

Paedo Polanski free after Pope sends Swiss judge glowing reference

Switzerland - (Gnomes of Zurich Mess): A fantastic character reference from the Pope has persuaded the Swiss Justice (sic) Ministry to deny a US extradition warrant for convicted pervert Roman Polanski. The 76 year-old movie maker's personal fathe...

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Funny story: Number 10: "Pope Won't Escape Axe"

Number 10: "Pope Won't Escape Axe"

DOWNING Street has tried to calm controversy over the Papal visit to Britain by promising that the expected £12million bill won't escape swingeing budgetary cuts. It is thought that Pope Benedict, "Panzer Pope" to his mates, will now arrive by low...

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Funny story: Pope's UK Holiday To Cost Taxpayer £23million

Pope's UK Holiday To Cost Taxpayer £23million

A fierce row has broken out over the Pope's planned UK vacation later this year. It has emerged that the taxpayer is likely to foot the bill for the Papal holiday to the tune of £23 million pounds. REACTION Thomson Holidays spokesman David T...

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Funny story: Pope And Queen Deny Rumours Their Seeking Larry King's CNN Replacement

Pope And Queen Deny Rumours Their Seeking Larry King's CNN Replacement

CNN are looking for a replacement for the ever ageing Larry King, after hosting Larry King Live on the cable network for over 25 years. Rumours are rife that Queen and the Pope have sought to move in on the vacant chair. The Catholic Church fee...

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Funny story: Pope confesses all

Pope confesses all

The Pontif made it quite clear today, that he will not step down after confessing to getting three Nuns pregnant. In a defiant mood, he stated: "I'ma not, ina da mood tu spek ebowt theesa problemo. Dees stupido woman, tella mea dey isa ona da p...

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Funny story: Newly Installed Cams Capture Nuns Plotting to Overthrow Vatican

Newly Installed Cams Capture Nuns Plotting to Overthrow Vatican

Vatican City - When the Pope issued the order to have crime cams installed in and around the Vatican in order to cut down on the incidences of clandestine alley-way meetings between the priests and their prey, little did he think that they would unco...

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Funny story: Three Gay Priests Create Stir by Slipping Into Old Habits and Emerging from Closet!

Three Gay Priests Create Stir by Slipping Into Old Habits and Emerging from Closet!

Vatican spokesmen were silent today after a show of solidarity by 3 English Priests who finally came out of the closet and paraded about Westminster clothed in habits. The mincing, hip swaying circus clogged traffic at the intersection of Old Que...

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Funny story: Pope Disappears. Kidnapped?

Pope Disappears. Kidnapped?

The Vatican has announced the disappearance of Pope Benedict XVI. Papal spokesman, Cardinale Pippo Stronzopieno, said that he doubted that the Pontiff's corporal entity simply assumed into heaven. "Dat, no mak-a dee sens. He no-a go uppa to dee he...

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Funny story: Benedictine Condom-King's Body Found

Benedictine Condom-King's Body Found

After an exhaustive search throughout The Netherlands, The Dutch police have discovered the body of Benedictine condom-king, Rameses Trojani, floating in a backwater canal in Amsterdam. The grisly discovery was made by a "painted woman" servicing a...

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Funny story: Dutch Subpoena Pope Benedict XVI Over Apparent Condom-King Abduction

Dutch Subpoena Pope Benedict XVI Over Apparent Condom-King Abduction

The Amsterdam District Attorney, Hans Leeouenoveck, has subpoenaed His Holiness, Pope Benedict XVI, in the investigation of the disappearance of Rameses Trojani. "This whole case smells worse than five loaves of bread and two fish. It's more li...

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Funny story: Dutch Police Raid Convent in Search of Benedictine Condom King

Dutch Police Raid Convent in Search of Benedictine Condom King

Acting on an anonymous tip, the Dutch Secret Police raided the Carmelite Convent of Saint Amelie with the expectation of rescuing Rameses Trojani. The billionaire creator of the Benedict XVI Condoms has been missing for over a day and foul play is s...

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Funny story: Creator of Pope Benedict Condoms Vanishes

Creator of Pope Benedict Condoms Vanishes

Rameses Trojani, the creator of the controversial Pope Benedict XVI condoms, has vanished from his 16th century castle outside of Antwerp. It was only yesterday that he announced that he was the target of a Vatican fatwa because of his depiction of...

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Funny story: Creator of Pope Benedict Condoms Receiving Death Threats

Creator of Pope Benedict Condoms Receiving Death Threats

Rameses Trojani, creator and distributor of the controversial Pope Benedict XVI condoms, announced yesterday that he has been receiving death threats and has demanded 24-hour police protection. Herr Trojani, billionaire owner of The Netherlands In...

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Funny story: The Pope prays to Fatima in Portugal hoping she can convert his flock of naughty "Black Sheep"

The Pope prays to Fatima in Portugal hoping she can convert his flock of naughty "Black Sheep"

In a desperate final attempt to save the Catholic church from the wrath of God, the Pope has travelled to Portugal and amidst thousands of his dumb, blind, ignorant, docile followers has asked Fatima for guidance. The Pope realises that there are...

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