Donald Trump is not human. Proof has emerged that the creature known as The Donald actually is a failed experiment by North Korean scientists to develop an army of cyborgs. It all was part of a top secret North Korean plot to infiltra...
WASHINGTON, DC - Hilary Clinton says the United States should not elect a Republican president. "I would not advocate that we put a Republican in charge of this nation." Ms. Clinton said Sunday. Clinton's comment comes on the heels of GOP front...
New York, NY. In a shocking report surprising many across the political landscape, Donald Trump has issued a statement of apology that begins by saying, "I would like to apologize for all the inflammatory, insulting and divisive statements I've made...
BALTIMORE, MD - Baltimore Mayor, Democrat Stephanie Rawlings-Blake, will not seek re-election in 2016, but she announced that she will be seeking the office of President of the United States. Rawlings-Blake (D) "led" the city during unrest followi...
MACON, GA-At a campaign event for 2024 held last Wednesday at Trump Arena in Macon, GA, Donald Trump announced that he is an atheist who often dines on pâté made from the livers of unborn fetuses. Political pundits following Trump's comments at his c…
Hey! Listen up, you poor, miserable, deluded little satire writers. You guys thought you could make fun of the old Trump here, you thought I was just like all the other guys, right? Yeah, I know what you guys do. I know your style. You did it to Clinton. You did to Bush. You're doing it to Obama. And somehow, you poor, pitiful little satire scribblers and jaded comedy jacks thought you cou...
Donald Trump's toupee has insisted in a recent press conference that Donald Trump is, in fact, a real person. 'Many people seem to think he's a comedy character or even a figment of their imagination' said the toupee, 'but he's actually real and...
A Rathskeller deep in the forested woods. Night has drawn its blackest curtain across the outer world, blocking out even the niggardly light from the stars. Rain hammers against the windows and lightning cackles in the air. A troupe of men with faces that seek the shadows meet in a corner booth away from the gazes of the other inn patrons. They speak in cautious whispers that they wish no other...
Donald Trump is facing intense public pressure to reveal the method of working behind his idea to build The Great Wall of The United States. Fresh allegations have surfaced that it could be based on at least one fantasy series. The border chasteni...
[The candidates speak out at a town meeting in Plumbucket, New Hampshire . . .] "You know, Jeb, that's just the stupidest thing I've ever heard, that illegally crossing the border is 'an act of love.' Where did you get that from, one of your wife's relatives?" "Yeah? It's funny you should say that, Ted, since you weren't even born in this country. How about you show us your birth certifi...
1988: A Mock Epic for Two Parties "I can't believe I'm losing to this guy." Michael Dukakis to Diane Sawyer, 1988. Election night and I turn on Democracy on CNN. Proclaim, O Muse, how it turned out We ended up with such a rout. Was sleaze this year inordinate Or do our noses swim in stink? So that we can't tell gold from brass Or how George Bush could be so crass. The Hero of my...
This year's crop of Presidential weeds..... er... candidates made their appearance this week at the traditional show case starting gate for the quad yearly election- the Iowa State Fair. This time in a stock pen. All the hopefuls vying for the so-...
Donald Trump this morning blamed Mexicans for any torture that occurred at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, saying that "since Mexicans brought that nasty green guantanamo dip with them when they illegally crossed the border into Cuba, they've been force-feedin...
Republican National Committee is seeking qualified candidates for nomination for President of the United States in 2016. No prior experience necessary. Dear RNC: In response to your ad, please consider me a candidate for the Republican nomination for President in 2016. Although I have never held elective office, you can see from the enclosed resume that I have a long list of accomplishmen...
Presidential Candidate Donald Trump released his Mexican Border Protection Plan today. "I have obtained an exclusive 50 year employment contract with Godzilla. He will patrol the entire Mexican border,where he will literally stomp out illegal aliens"...
ANUTA ISLAND- "He's going to get around to insulting us sooner or later" was the sentiment echoed by the Anuta tribe of smallest inhabited location on the planet. The inhabitants of the tiny Polynesian island, Anuta, have released a statement whic...
Donald Trump's inexplicable hair has decided to put its notoriety to good use, and ride that exposure to the second highest seat in the land. Donald Trump has declared that, "The only thing on the planet audacious enough to meet my Vice Presidential...
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