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Funny satire stories about Santa

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Funny story: Christmas is to be sponsored

Christmas is to be sponsored

Coca-Cola have agreed to sponsor next years Christmas, in a deal worth around £2.4 Billion. This means that the only soft drinks available will be made by Coca-Cola. Santa will also have to have the Coca-Cola logo on his hat and coa...

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Funny story: 5000 Santas Laid Off

5000 Santas Laid Off

There was some bad news for the Government in the Commons today, when Employment Secretary Albert Dole announced that 5000 Santa Claus jobs had "gone to the wall" since Christmas Day.

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Funny story: Freebasing department store Santa jumps to his death without a parachute, believing he could fly like magic reindeer

Freebasing department store Santa jumps to his death without a parachute, believing he could fly like magic reindeer

Los Angeles, California - Tragedy occurred as a department store Santa leaped to his death from a building in downtown Los Angeles yesterday. It is believed the man was responding to ad in the local newspaper calling on free-base jumpers to gather th...

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Funny story: FBI uncovers pornography and Santa's illegal surveillance systems; puts NORAD to shame

FBI uncovers pornography and Santa's illegal surveillance systems; puts NORAD to shame

FBI agents today raided Santa's workshop and discovered one of the most sophisticated and comprehensive surveillance systems ever known to man.

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Funny story: Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer dies of alcoholism

Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer dies of alcoholism

Rudolph, the famous beacon nosed reindeer who helped Santa Claus guide his sleigh during a treacherous winter night some 60 years ago, has died of alcoholism. He was 73.

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Funny story: Bush: "Put Santa on Terrorist Watch List!"

Bush: "Put Santa on Terrorist Watch List!"

(Washington, D.C.) The Washington Post today released sections of a memo from George Bush to Directors of Homeland Security and CIA, Michael Cherthoff and Michael Hayden that was written on November 19, 2007. It begins, "I just pardoned the turk...

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Funny story: NSA Recruits Santa Claus' "Naughty or Nice" Global Surveillance System to Fight War on Terror

NSA Recruits Santa Claus' "Naughty or Nice" Global Surveillance System to Fight War on Terror

North Pole - In a recent press conference today, NSA officials announced that they have reached an agreement with North Pole representatives allowing the US government to have access to the countless files of information collected by Santa Claus and...

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Funny story: Santa Claus Arrested for 19th Century Child Slavery Crimes

Santa Claus Arrested for 19th Century Child Slavery Crimes

Santa Claus - A.K.A "Jolly Old Saint Nick", "Father Christmas", "Pere Noel" - has been arrested and faces extradition after being convicted of sending poor tiny orphan children up chimneys to do...

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Funny story: Ho Ho Ho - Has Santa Got A Surprise For You?

Ho Ho Ho - Has Santa Got A Surprise For You?

Don't tell the kiddies but Christmas could be cancelled this year if the National Union of Santas has its way.

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Funny story: Santa Claus - 'Clinically obese'

Santa Claus - 'Clinically obese'

Health chiefs have announced that the much loved Santa Claus is considered to be clinically obese.

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Funny story: Black Elves call for first Black Santa Claus

Black Elves call for first Black Santa Claus

NORTH POLE -- In what appears to be an historic upheaval of the usually business-like operations of preparation for the upcoming Christmas season, an angry mob of black elves are calling for the resignation of Kris Kringle and demanding he be replace...

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Funny story: Code Red: Santa Claus Detained!

Code Red: Santa Claus Detained!

Children everywhere may be in for a nasty surprise on Christmas morning. The North Pole Daily has reported that Santa has been detained during a fly over practice run over Washington D.C. It seems some suit over at Langley didn't like the &qu...

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Funny story: Christmas Under Threat From Global Warming

Christmas Under Threat From Global Warming

There are only 59 shopping days left until Christmas, but don't get carried away just yet, because it may be cancelled altogether - due to nasty old Global Warming.

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Funny story: Father Christmas voted most unbelievable fictional character

Father Christmas voted most unbelievable fictional character

A recent poll, dreamt up by TV Pundits with no good ideas of their own has revealed that amongst the British public, Father Christmas is the most unbelievable of all fictional characters. He tops a poll that is made up by Satan, Jesus Christ, David B...

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Funny story: Santa Claus is bulletproof - isn´t she?

Santa Claus is bulletproof - isn´t she?

I remember the Christmas of 2010. It was the Christmas I tried to kill Santa Claus. Yes, I was a person of action back then. But what else was I supposed to do? I had to pay 206 Euros for a parking ticket and therefore was left with no money to celebrate the annual pre - Christmas Summer Holy Night on August 24th.

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Funny story: Santa gets new outfit!

Santa gets new outfit!

The polar express: After years of speculation that Santa Claus might quit his job due to the rising heat, it has been confirmed that Santa is not the kind of guy that backs off. In an exclusive interview with the big ol' guy, Santa gets candy...uhm...i mean candid and reveals his future plans.

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Funny story: Two of Santa's Reindeer on the Lam

Two of Santa's Reindeer on the Lam

North Pole - Today Santa's Little Helper Gazette reported that two of Santa's reindeer have escaped the North Pole Toy Factory and Compound and are on the lam. "Donner and Blitzen have escaped," shouted Santa Claus above the clatter, as he t...

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