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Funny story: Police Swoop on Child Abuse Ringleader

Police Swoop on Child Abuse Ringleader

London, UK: Police swooped today to nab the man believed to be head of the world's largest paedophile ring. The elderly German, an Italian resident who arrived in the UK today travelling under the name Benedict, has been identified by police as th...

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Funny story: Pope agrees to penal substitutionary atonement

Pope agrees to penal substitutionary atonement

Following the less than grovelling admission by UK Catholic Church Supremo Archbishop of Westminster Vincent Nichols that the response to child abuse by Priests had been "poor", the Vatican has made an unequivocal and trend-setting announcement. The...

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Funny story: Pope to dunk thousands in Diana Princess of Wales Memorial Fountain baptism spectacular

Pope to dunk thousands in Diana Princess of Wales Memorial Fountain baptism spectacular

London - (Goodbye England's Woes Mess): The mass ablution of congenital sins will take place in the open air at London's Hype Park this Saturday. Weeks of preparation have seen thousands of gallons of disinfectant dumped into the Memorial Fountain...

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Funny story: Social Services 'get wind of 3,500 children expected at Pope's Hyde Park circus'

Social Services 'get wind of 3,500 children expected at Pope's Hyde Park circus'

London - (Holy Shit! Mess): The authorities said today they'd be taking no chances as the papal freakshow advance party rolled into town. Thousand of specialist child protection officials will be mingling with the crowds on Saturday amid reports...

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Funny story: Pope Benny to have tea party with "holy see" men

Pope Benny to have tea party with "holy see" men

Benny the magic pope is popping in for a cuppa, lovely. Best get the kettle on and bake a cake. Prince Philip will be meeting Mr The Pope when his plane touches down on Thursday and then it's off to bonny scotch land, yay, road trip! Phil and B...

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Funny story: Pope flees angry London mob using jet-pack

Pope flees angry London mob using jet-pack

Pope Benedict's state visit to Britain has ended almost as soon as it began. Hours after landing at London's Heathrow Airport, the Pontiff was addressing a crowd of Roman Catholics in Trafalgar Square when spontaneous angry protests by gays, victims...

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Funny story: Susan Boyle pulls out of Popefest gig blaming frog-in-the-throat disaster!

Susan Boyle pulls out of Popefest gig blaming frog-in-the-throat disaster!

Edinburgh - (Premature Evacuation News): A hapless Parisian onion seller had to be surgically extracted from the singer's larynx this afternoon. Firemen fought for half an hour before bringing in an oxy-acetylene torch to remove the intrusive dork...

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Funny story: Royal Family in Torment

Royal Family in Torment

As Head of the Church of England, or Top Gal as the Archbishop of Canterbury cheerfully refers to her, the Queen is worried about a load of Papal bull about to descend on her territory. 'He comes here endangering our young boys , and even girls. T...

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Funny story: The Pope has a George W Bush-sized drink problem

The Pope has a George W Bush-sized drink problem

Rome - (Holy Spirit News): Some Zaprudderesque footage, circa 1968, of Ratzinger, Bush and a crateload of communion wine has surfaced in London. Up-and-coming drunk George W and his highball pall are seen demolishing the Mavrodaphne consigment in...

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Funny story: Pope to Visit Children's Homes - Police Alerted

Pope to Visit Children's Homes - Police Alerted

A huge security operation has been initiated following rumours that Pope Bendy Dick intends to visit several children's homes on his UK visit. Hundreds of CCTV cameras have been installed at each establishment and extra police deployed. The Vatic...

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Funny story: Pope Signs NIKE Deal

Pope Signs NIKE Deal

Christian's and bandwagon riders have expressed their distress and disbelief after The Vatican revealed that The Pope had indeed signed a sponsorship deal with NIKE. Rumours have circulated for weeks now that a deal was to be struck after His Hol...

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Funny story: Bristol Palin's DWTS Outfits to Be Made by Vatican Nuns

Bristol Palin's DWTS Outfits to Be Made by Vatican Nuns

When Bristol Palin announced that her Dancing with the Stars outfits would be modest, it seemed inevitable: they should be made by nuns. And why not go right to the top? The Spoof can now confirm that it is the nuns at the Vatican -- the ones...

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Funny story: Claudy bomb conspiracy report blames Ratzinger

Claudy bomb conspiracy report blames Ratzinger

Belfast - (Torquemada News): Commenting on today's report a Vatican spokesman said the church was sticking to strict ecclesiastical guidelines called 'omerta'. Decryption of these has revealed collusion between the government and Cardinal Josef R...

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Funny story: UK taxpayers incensed with having to foot 12-million pounds Pope entourage bills

UK taxpayers incensed with having to foot 12-million pounds Pope entourage bills

OK all you bankrupt Brits get ready for the Pope Ratfinker Road show - A modern day Nero with his Circus-Maximus troupe. Replete with all the ceremonial hogwash, glittering frippery and regalia and an entourage of blood-sucking, hangers-on. Your...

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Funny story: Popemobile Clamped in Milan

Popemobile Clamped in Milan

The Pope was left with a red face after his adapted golf cart- known as "The Popemobile," was clamped outside shops in Milan. His Holiness was out looking to buy a USB cable to fix his, "Buggered up Lexmark Printer," when he stopped on double yel...

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Funny story: Top Vatican Cardinal blasts 'incapable' politicians; Says time has come for Italy to be ruled by the Pope

Top Vatican Cardinal blasts 'incapable' politicians; Says time has come for Italy to be ruled by the Pope

ROME: Cardinal Burl O'Scooney a leading Vatican authority and future Pope contender says Italy's political leaders are 'incapable' of fixing the country's economy and are only indulging in squabbles while pursuing self interests. Terming the beha...

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Funny story: Pope to visit Skelmersdale

Pope to visit Skelmersdale

Residents of Skelmersdale, Lancashire, were thrilled to learn via The Pope's Twitter page that he intends to visit the town in November. The Pope, who is already visiting the UK next month, decided to make a return visit later in the Autumn, due to...

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