In Toronto Sunday, Canadian Finance Minister Jim Flaherty restated what he had said on Saturday, that any protectionist moves by the United States or other countries would meet resistance around the world but Canada would not erect trade barriers of...
According to actor Harry Connick Jr., winter up in Canada can be a rough season and he doesn't want to try it again. While filming the romantic comedy "New in Town" in Winnipeg last January, the actor's face, beard, brass monkeys and eyelashes fr...
Ottawa, Canada - Canadians woke up this morning to find a "Gone Fishing" sign hung on the locked doors of their Parliament. "I was as surprised as anyone," said the Canadian Prime Minister at a press conference today. "They didn't invite me, let alon...
Blueberry Hill, Ontario, Canada - Plagued by numerous class action suits, Canada's leading cell phone giant has instructed its lawyers to settle out of court. In a dramatic announcement, spokesperson Briar Patch revealed that an amicable settlement h...
Do Canadians really exist? Is there really such a whimsical folk who believe in such things as mounted police, plaid shirts, and wood burning stoves? Or are they simply a product of someone's over-inventive fantasy? As a child growing up in Wi…
News flash from the Judge Retort Ottawa bureau: Ok. So, like, in a show of great northern neighborliness, the Canadians have made a beauty offer, eh. No, you should see! Look. They are so magnanimmm, magminomo, magnicartimous,… They are so big-hearted that - this is so beauty, eh! - Canadians are going to re-elect America's conservatives if Obama wins, eh. The Canadians think it's, like,...
World Wide Wonderfully Wondrous Sports Magazine recently sent one of its senior writers, Rhubarb 'Seventh-Inning Stretch' Stretchalini to Saskatoon, Saskatchewan to interview Pierre Thibodaux Lafayette, the commissioner of the brand new all-womens fo...
Tragic news from the north! The eastern third of Canada (a country to the North of America) was devastated by a rare hurricane, named Eh. Honorable Ian MacStormcloud of parliament made the following comment: "Ok. So like, it was a really beauty...
Sarah Palin VPILF of the Republicunt Party has ignited an international incident with her foolish remarks in one of her rare but ungemlike interviews. Palin told Katie Couric that when Putin rears his head, he will come into American airspace in...
Ottawa - Reading from a prepared script with US secret service agents flanking him, Prime Minister Steven Harper announced "The fact that the Canadian election is set for the same time frame as the US election this year is purely coincidental. It is...
VANCOUVER, CANADA: With the prospect of 20 million dollars dangling before his eyes, you would think Mats Sundin would bite - and bite hard. But for some reason, the procrastinating, dithering Swede has driven Vancouver Canucks GM Mike Gillis stir-...
OTTAWA (FMLiveWire) - Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper has strongly voiced his support of the torture and prosecution of Canadian children at Guantanamo Bay by the US military.
Toronto (CNN) - Tired of being perceived as Americas Side-kick Canada has petitioned to join the Axis of Evil. Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper stated "we need to toughen up our image and becoming a member of the Axis of Evil is a great fi...
Tyee Spit Beach, near Vancouver in Canada, has been in the news recently since the discovery of six human feet washed up on the shore over a period of ten months.
1. The Manoki Indians of Canada consider the testicles of a beaver to be an aphrodisiac as well as good eating.
MONTREAL, PQ - A severe drought which limited cotton production in the southern United States last fall is having a dramatic effect on the Canadian tuxedo industry.
TORONTO, ON - A Canada Customs official is adamant that he adhered to procedural guidelines and did not deviate from protocol when clearing three suspected terrorists through customs at Toronto's Pearson International Airport.
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