On a crowded airplane flight aboard Alaska Airlines, a female passenger (not Sarah Palin) and a scorpion struggled over a seat, resulting in the scorpion's biting the woman's hand. Flight 567 was approaching the runway when the incident occurred.
The Pentagon reacted with surprise to intelligence that ISIS has encroached upon U. S. military forces training Iraqi troops. "We're concerned," Rear Admiral Howe Cudditbee confessed. "We're also perplexed. How could 40,000 terrorists who have bee...
WASHINGTON D.C.- Forget candy and flowers, they've been done to death for Valentine's Day. This year, show your love by forcing your special someone to sign up for something they probably don't want - Obamacare! Who wouldn't want to be surprised with...
Speaking to a crowd in Iowa, U. S. Vice-president-in-Charge-of-Vice Joe Bidet outed himself as a "recovering homosexual" today. Before an audience of ten or fifteen supporters, Bidet gave a shout out to an old friend, calling, "Neal Smith, old but...
WASHINGTON, DC - Citizens in all 50 states should be forced by the Supreme Court to be gay-married, President Barack Obama has decreed. The directive marks another phase in Obama's progressive shift on gay marriage, which has included declarations...
Following the revolutionary "No Child Will Escape" Act of 2001 fronted by George W. Bush and signed into law on Jan, 8, 2002, Barack Obama has launched his own follow-up "No Child Can Ever Escape" education bill which will be passed shortly with no f...
GOP leaders held a press conference after the news that job growth continued to expand dramatically under Democratic guidance. John Boehner surrounded by Ted Cruz and other Tea Party notables announced today: "This president with his pro growth policies is forcing folks back to work to make his Libtards look good before the 2016 election!" Washington reporter Candy Cookie asked him; " Are yo...
BILLINGSGATE POST: German Chancellor Angela Merkel performed a dominatrix hat trick on willing participant Barack Obama as Vladimir Putin watched on with bemused interest. With the fate of Ukraine hanging in balance, President Barack Obama allowed...
What was claimed to be a U.S. made search and destroy drone was shot down by a SAM this morning. No casualties were reported. The drone "hit" was claimed by by Mustapha Badpun of the Doner Kebab staff. A spokesman for the Turkish kebab house told...
In the wake of Bri Willyums' lies about his "adventures and misadventures in and out of combat," renewed interest has arisen with regard to former First Lady-Senator-presidential candidate-Secretary of State Hillbilly Clinton's claim that she landed...
GOP leaders held a press conference after the news that job growth continued to expand dramatically under Democratic guidance. John Boehner surrounded by Ted Cruz and other Tea Party notables announced today: "This president with his pro growth po...
The National Prayer Breakfast held yesterday is hosted by members of the United States Congress. It has often had controversial speakers. President Obama, himself, is now in that category as yesterday. He initially attacked the Islamic State as...
When Speaker of the House John Boehner invited Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu to address a joint session of Congress without White House permission, the tsunami backlash began. It is protocol that before someone is invited to address a joi...
On reflection, he was more than happy that he had lived to experience such an event, however unreal it may have appeared at the time. He could see it all clearly now. Gazing up at the stars that seemed suddenly close and friendly he could not help but replay the scene over and over in his mind. To a stunned and packed Senate gathering President Barack Obama got slowly to his feet to announce th...
Barney Fife, former deputy sheriff of Mayberry, NC, and an "intimate associate" of Prezident Barry Obummer, is "stepping down as a longtime friend of the chief executive," the White House confirmed. Although the White House would not "speculate" o...
WASHINGTON --The decision by Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin "Bibi" Netanyahu and House Speaker John Boehner to set up an address to the U.S. Congress has set up a backlash by the Obama Administration. This affair was organized by Netanyahu; his amb...
Jaggedone's CIA reporter gets crushed by Ukrainian separatist tank but manages to get his report out before Putin gives him a bullet in the head, and here it is: Brave, star Georgian CIA reporter and ex-Russian Roach-Spy in Afghanistan, Vladimir V...
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