A blasphemous landmark along Interstate 75 was destroyed by the Lord God Almighty during severe thunderstorms Monday night, but officials said Tuesday they will defy the Creator, and rebuilt it. Monroe, Ohio police state that a bolt of lightning t...
MSNBC reports that a 6-story abomination, affectionately known as "Touchdown Jesus," burnt to the ground on Monday night, June 14th, the year of our Lord 2010. The BBC reports that insurance investigators have determined the cause of its destruction...
Cincinnati, OH. - A six story tall statue of Jesus thought to have been destroyed by lightening in the small town of Monroe last night was seen instead this morning crawling south on Interstate Seventy-One. The sculpture, 62 feet tall and 40 feet...
Scientology guru L. Ron Hubbard reportedly believes the lightning strike that burned down a six-story statute of Jesus Christ in Monroe, Ohio was a God-sent signal that Jesus was not God's only-begotten son. Hubbard, who died in 1986, channeled...
Legend has it that 13th-century cool chick Rose of Viterbo stood for hours on a raging pyre without being burned, which is one kick-ass party trick, and could see into the future. What was not known was why this fun-at-parties momma is dead. Rose...
Passion plays all over Europe are being hit by the recession especially the one in Oberammergau, Germany. Global fans of Jesus flock to the plays depicting the final days of his life and the crucifixion, but this years passion plays have been sore...
Oklahoma City -- Let's get right to it, shall we? I'm not gettin' it, folks: why in the world do we celebrate the resurrection of Jesus by instilling within our children the expectation of a rabbit coming by the house and dropping off a load of muti-colored chicken eggs once per year? As I've noted in other "Commentaries," I readily acknowledge that I'm not the brightest bulb in the socket. G...
Sir Elton John gave homophobic protesters in Morocco the piano finger after protests by Islamists who tried to prevent Sir John's appearance, claiming the openly gay singer would offend public morals. Sir Elton came underfire with his bitch lip c...
In the most astounding of discoveries, Jesus H. Christ of the Nazareth State Magi, was indeed a legend in his time. At college that is. A recent discovery has led to the translation of an ancient journal of one of Jesus' classmates who cite his as...
Gulf of Mexico - (Crude Mess): The face of Jesus has appeared in the massive oil slick gushing from the Deepwater Horizon rig which sank on 22 April. Aerial imagery from the Hubble Telescope shows the Messiah in the middle of the spill as it threa...
Jesus Christ was arrested just outside of Phoenix this morning by Sheriff Joe Arpaio, Arizona's famous racist Sheriff. Media outlets are reporting that Jesus and twelve companions were traveling to Phoenix when Arpaio stopped them on suspicion of bei...
Las Vegas, Nevada - Jesus Christ appeared at the Central Christian Church in Las Vegas, Nevada to denounce feminist to a large group of practitioners who attended the Sunday Ceremony. After showing up anonymously to the Sunday ceremony, he held...
It took some convincing but Karl Rove has done it again. In negotiations with Heaven, earlier this week, he got the big G to run for President. It has turned out that God was rather cheesed-off that his son thought he could be President, but dear-o...
Alex Reid, cage-fighting cross-dressing pet husband of Katie Price has claimed his fame level has now reached very dizzy heights. Overly-tanned to the point of becoming a possible BNP manifesto target, and styled as a Roman gladiator, the muscle-b...
New York, January 2, 8010 - Jesus Christ appeared at Times Square during the New Years celebration, Decemeber 31, 7010. There was much anticipation as an estimated one million people showed up to hear him speak. Christ appeared at Times Square i...
Ace atheist Richard Dawkins had a shock yesterday morning when he discovered the "face of Jesus" on his kitchen door. Dawkins, author of "The God Delusion" was left stunned when he was confronted by the image engraved on the wood. "When I clos...
Jesus Christ, Son of God, has had to walk across the sea of Galilee following the cancellation of all flights into and out of Jerusalem airport. A thick cloud of volcanic ash has spread across the skies, leaving airports deserted. Jesus was accomp...
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