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Funny story: Finger Doctors: E-Readers Are Killing Our Business

Finger Doctors: E-Readers Are Killing Our Business

A national association of finger doctors said today that e-readers like the Kindle and Nook are taking away a large segment of their business. "We used to treat dozens of patients with paper cuts on their fingers from books and magazines each da...

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Funny story: Prostate Exam Smartphone App Not Safe, Officials Say

Prostate Exam Smartphone App Not Safe, Officials Say

Officials with the Consumer Product Safety Commission are warning users to avoid using a recently released prostate exam app because of safety concerns. The Boldfinger consists of both the app program and a four-inch long plastic finger that connect...

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Funny story: Now horse meat found in cannibal meals

Now horse meat found in cannibal meals

Supermarket giant Tesdabury's has become the latest store caught up in the horse meat scandal after allegations that horse meat has been found in its "Cannibal Range" of ready meals. A clearly shaken company spokesperson Sue Perior admitted "This...

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Funny story: Throat Doctors: Saying "oigliieeeeeeee" More Effective Than Saying "ahhhhhhhhhh"

Throat Doctors: Saying "oigliieeeeeeee" More Effective Than Saying "ahhhhhhhhhh"

The results of a two-year, $3-million study indicate that throat doctors should be asking their patients to "open up and say oigliieeeeeeee" instead of "say ahhhhhhhhhh." "We realize this is a huge change after decades of using ahhhhhhhhhh, but...

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Funny story: Doctors now say pregnant women should definitely clean cat litter box

Doctors now say pregnant women should definitely clean cat litter box

After many years of advising pregnant women to avoid cleaning their cat's litter box, medical experts say new research suggests soon-to-be moms not only should change the kitty litter but perform the task as frequently as possible. "It's a huge...

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Funny story: Workers complain that the unemployed are getting too physically fit

Workers complain that the unemployed are getting too physically fit

"I'm working 70 hours a week and have no time to work out, yet my worthless, unemployed neighbor looks like Mr. Universe. It's not fair," grumbled 36-year-old electrical engineer Angus Pasternak. "Ever since he was laid off, he does nothing but jog...

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Funny story: Heath experts: People who ROFL have cleaner floors but more severe allergies

Heath experts: People who ROFL have cleaner floors but more severe allergies

If you ROFL, your allergies are likely to be much worse allergies those who don't. That's according to researchers at the Centers for Disease Control, wherever that is. At a news conference today, Dr. Sanka Belchner told reporters, "Please save y...

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Funny story: Public Cash Studies

Public Cash Studies

Scientists love nothing more than wasting public funding on conducting experiments that have conclusions children could have come up with. Back and to the Left news, sick of seeing so much money getting flushed down the toilet, pulled together some of the most meaningless studies science has completed in the past year. Please note this is not a bitter vendetta against the scientific community beca...

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Funny story: Kidney Transplant Leader Dies

Kidney Transplant Leader Dies

The Dr who performed the world's first successful organ transplant surgery in 1954 has died at his home, following a stroke. Before his death Back and to the Left News was able to attain a interview with the great Dr and now that he's dead he cant sue us for publishing it. So Dr Murray it's a great honour to talk to one of the foremost pioneers in modern surgery- The pleasure is all yours I...

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Funny story: Doctors seek huge rise in ice in drinks

Doctors seek huge rise in ice in drinks

Leading British medical bodies, concerned about high levels of alcohol-related health problems, are calling for more ice to be used in drinks. An increase of 50 per cent more ice in an average glass of beverage bought in pubs and bars would reduc...

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Funny story: Dangerous Stupid Levels Found In NYC Water

Dangerous Stupid Levels Found In NYC Water

The most recent quarterly testing of New York City's water supply revealed dangerous levels of stupid in the city's water - over eighteen times the permissible levels, even by New York's lenient stupid standards (New York is second only to Georgia in...

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Funny story: You know what makes me Sick?

You know what makes me Sick?

You know what makes me Sick? My 300 pound next door neighbor who sun bathes in the nude. Every morning I have to try to keep down my breakfast as she takes off her robe and lay's out in the sun with the sweat rolling off her body like the fat off of a pig on a spic. My cat who comes to the dinner table and throws up a half eaten chip monk as my date vomits the fettuccine dinner that took me...

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Funny story: Wonder Drug unveilled that will cure any and every disease worldwide

Wonder Drug unveilled that will cure any and every disease worldwide

The Daily Express has published a world exclusive mentioning that scientists have developed a wonder drug that will cure any disease. The implications of this discovery are being assessed by a special committee set up by David Cameron, led by a fo...

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Funny story: Pathway To Death Scheme Causes NHS Consternation

Pathway To Death Scheme Causes NHS Consternation

The controversial "Pathway To Death" scheme has been reviewed by a board of NHS directors and they have come to the conclusion that doctors will now have to get permission from people before putting them on it. Which is a shame for doctors as it will...

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Funny story: Bad news for sons-in-law: women who quit smoking by age 50 can live up to a decade longer

Bad news for sons-in-law: women who quit smoking by age 50 can live up to a decade longer

HARFOLD, Vt. - Harfold State College released this week a study which son-in-laws everywhere will have a hard time swallowing. Women who quit smoking by the age of 50 dramatically cut risk of an early death, enjoying up to ten to fifteen more year...

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Funny story: WHO Encorages Sex With Fruit Through New 10 Point Memorandum

WHO Encorages Sex With Fruit Through New 10 Point Memorandum

ANKARA: At a conference in Ankara, Turkey yesterday, the World Health Organisation validated it's 10 point memorandum encouraging sexual relations with a fruit.  The general consensus is to eradicate lonliness with alternate, safe and satisfying f...

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Funny story: Fake medical doctors on the increase and causing harm to millions of citizens

Fake medical doctors on the increase and causing harm to millions of citizens

Back and to the Left news has discovered that nearly 34% of men and 59% of women may have been treated by a bogus DR. We discovered this during our prostate exam; our suspicions were raised when asked to leave a tip. So as responsible journalists for a number of respectable magazines (Winos Weekly to name but one) we decided to make a quick checklist to make sure you don't fall into a fake Doctors...

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