President Obama on Tuesday will announce a broad new research initiative, starting with $100 million in 2014, to invent and refine new technologies to understand the hows and whys - the unique functioning of - Fundamentalist Christian/Redneck thou...
After a lengthy ten hour investigation pursuing thousands of clues, tips and accusations, Russia's Prime Minister Vladimir Putin announced that the former Deputy Prime Minister under Boris Yeltsin, Boris Nemtsov, committed suicide by shooting himself...
Prezident Obummer has come clean--well, relatively clean. He confessed to having had a love affair with an alien--not an illegal alien from Mexico, but with a Vulcan--well, a half human, half-Vulcan. "I loved Spock," the prezident gushed. "H...
Washington DC - The Obama Administration's education department has come under fire for re-writing the nation's sex education standards so that they emphasize technique. The new standards, summarized in a recent Department of Education press relea...
SECOND CITY -- The Windy City, home to Prezident Obummer and his one-time chief of staff, Mayor-for-Now Rahm Emanuel, is (allegedly) operating a "black site" jail where prisoners are (allegedly) denied their Constitutional rights and are (allegedly)...
WINDY CITY - Despite the benefits of name recognition, Big Buck$ in campaign funds, and the endorsement of Prezident Obummer, The Windy City's incumbent mayor Rahm Emanuel was unable to secure enough votes to prevent a runoff election with his ch...
WASHINGTON, DC - The Obama administration has sent signals in recent days that it is moving toward a decision to mandate an all-transgender military. Defense Secretary Ash Carter said during a visit to Inyorbutistan that an all-transgender force w...
A recently leaked National Security Agency recording of a therapy session between President Barack Obama and his personal therapist revealed that Obama, in an effort to achieve mental and emotional balance, has decided to display the Nobel Peace Priz...
President Barack Obama is considering acting against the fluoridation of drinking water in the US. Almost seventy percent of the nation's household water supply is currently fluoridated despite the mounting evidence that it is actually injurious to h...
Washington AC/DC - All hell broke loose in the White House this morning after someone ejaculated over Barack Obama's cupcake turning the candy sprinkles green. Secret service detectives immediately quarantined the foaming confection in case Pluto...
OVER THERE -- Sweden, a member in good standing of The League of White Supremacist Nations, has ordered its ornithologists (birdbrained experts) to rename fowl that have been given "foul names" by Swedish birdwatchers over the years. "The names ar...
MADISON, WI - Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker may find himself in the middle of a political maelstrom after failing to say that he doesn't know if President Obama is a transgender serial womaniser. "I don't know," Walker, a likely 2016 presidential c...
In what must have been the gaffe of the century President Barack Obama slipped up at a press conference today and admitted to being a homosexual, foreign born, communist/Marxist, Muslim, socialist agitator who hates America and prays to Allah for the...
New York - Barack Obama has been outed as Kanye West's birth father in a DNA test published today. Findings from New York's Seedy Sign Eye Mammorial Hospital's paternity division reveal Kanye's actual father is the President. And the rapper's...
Mars One wants to send two dozen people to Mars, and Peter Felgentreff, 50, may well be one of them. For as long as he can remember, he's been "curious" about science, he gushes. His curiosity about what it would be like to live on Mars motivat...
In response to mounting criticism both at home and abroad President Obama told White House staffers this morning that he fully intends to do a full Samuel L Jackson on terrorism 'in any shape or form, any place in the world' - including Faux News's B...
President Obama gave the following address today: I would be willing to wager any amount with any member of the Tea Party that they could not pass the test given to immigrants desiring American citizenship. If flag waving Bible Belting assholes like Ted Cruz or Mike Huckleberry or Ted Cruz or Rick Perry can pass this test i will kiss their fat ignorant asses!" Here's a self-test for YOU t...
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