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Funny story: Scientists Propose Converting Soldiers Directly into Oil

Scientists Propose Converting Soldiers Directly into Oil

Scientists in Houston, Texas today proposed that each nation convert a number of their soldiers directly into oil. They know now that previous wars for oil were very messy and expensive and have found a reasonable solution which will be mutually ben...

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Funny story: Live Giant Squid Filmed: Then Consumed Immediately

Live Giant Squid Filmed: Then Consumed Immediately

A magnificent giant squid was captured by Japanese scientists who were disappointed to learn that the mythical creature Godzilla had once again eluded capture. The giant squid was the first of it's species to be caught on video tape.

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Funny story: "Gravity is a myth, the world sucks" monograph wins Nobel astrophysics prize

"Gravity is a myth, the world sucks" monograph wins Nobel astrophysics prize

Stockholm, Sweden - (Associated Mess): This year's Nobel astrophysics prize has been awarded to Creationist scientists from Kansas, Missouri whose contention of the non-existence of gravity as an empirical force to be reckoned with has earned th...

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Funny story: "Black Hole Factory" To Destroy Planet Earth

"Black Hole Factory" To Destroy Planet Earth

GENEVA (Reuters)--Mad scientists will generate a black hole every second when the world's most powerful particle accelerator comes online here in 2007, and one of them will eventually gobble up planet Earth, acknowledges the project's creator Dr.

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Funny story: Red-headed Mice Help the Neglected Tan Obsessed

Red-headed Mice Help the Neglected Tan Obsessed

BOSTON (Routers) - Scientists have devised a devilish new way to prevent sunburn and its skin-hating effects. No longer will progeny of the Caucasoid peoples have to slather on nasty goop that readily washes off with tears, ruining that wonderful day...

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Funny story: Bush Blames Global Warming on Commie Gas

Bush Blames Global Warming on Commie Gas

Upon hearing the news report that read "Methane, a gas 20 times more potent than carbon dioxide in trapping heat in the atmosphere, appears to be bubbling up from thawing permafrost at a rate five times faster than originally measured, scientists...

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Funny story: Internet scientists demote .ORG to "dwarf domain"

Internet scientists demote .ORG to "dwarf domain"

CERN, SWITZERLAND -- An uproar took place in the digital world when the Internet Engineering Task Force demoted .ORG sites to the status of "dwarf domain" at its sixty-sixth official meeting in Montreal, Quebec, Canada. IETF chairman Brian...

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Funny story: Scientists Stunned to Learn the Extent of Unknown Bacteria in Oceans

Scientists Stunned to Learn the Extent of Unknown Bacteria in Oceans

Dr. Quinn Queasy, a marine researcher of great renown, was enjoying breakfast with his wife when he read about it in his morning newspaper. A global Census of Marine Life had just revealed that there might be more than 10 million types of bacteria (...

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Funny story: Scientists Discover Gene That Causes Fundamentalism and Homosexuality.

Scientists Discover Gene That Causes Fundamentalism and Homosexuality.

Bonn, Germany - "We never saw that one coming," said Dr. Fenton Weirdbank, head of research at the Bonn International Center for Genetic Research.

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Funny story: US Forgetting How to Operate Its Nuclear Missiles

US Forgetting How to Operate Its Nuclear Missiles

WASHINGTON (AP)-The Pentagon is running out of scientists and engineers who know how to operate and repair America's intercontinental nuclear and conventional missiles, according to the Defense Urgency Maintenance Board (DUMB).

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Funny story: Pentagon Plans "Cyberbug" Warrior and Spy Army

Pentagon Plans "Cyberbug" Warrior and Spy Army

THE PENTAGON--The Pentagon's defense scientists are busy trying to harness insects to create an army of "cyberbugs" that can be remotely controlled by the military to attack the many enemies of America, as well as locate explosives and relay spy...

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Funny story: "Woody Woodpecker is source of bird humour virus" claim denied

"Woody Woodpecker is source of bird humour virus" claim denied

Avian humour scientists were claiming last night that recent outbreaks of the deadly avian humour virus could spell the end of comedy throughout Western Europe and the US if not dealt with immediately by the authorities.

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Funny story: Disco Opens Cold Fusion Olympic Games

Disco Opens Cold Fusion Olympic Games

TURIN, Italy (UPDATE) -- Four cold fusion scientists were suspended, and the world's top-ranked calorimetrist, the British Martin Fleischmann, was barred from the Cold Fusion Olympic Games here on Friday. Hours later, Olympic competitors marched into...

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Funny story: New Studies Recommend Eat Lots Of Poison And Plenty Of Fat

New Studies Recommend Eat Lots Of Poison And Plenty Of Fat

According to a new study released today by leading Iraqi scientists, diets that are high in poisons and toxic substances can help you live a more healthier and fruitful life.

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Funny story: Red bull doesn't give you wings!

Red bull doesn't give you wings!

It has finally been proven by world scientists that red bull really doesn't give you wings. Yes the great advertising slogan has finally been proven wrong, but it took the scientists a full year of testing and research to figure it out.

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Funny story: Scientists Accidentally Discover God

Scientists Accidentally Discover God

An Interview with the Closeted Christian Scientists at the Bee Flight Discovery...

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Funny story: Legendary ‘Dickens' Family Focus of Hopeful Research

Legendary ‘Dickens' Family Focus of Hopeful Research

Grand Rapids, MI- Scientists, Anthropologist and Historians have all converged on the city of Grand Rapids, Michigan, to conduct research on the legendary ‘Dickens' family.

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