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Funny satire stories about Santa

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Funny story: Silly season for the Guinness Book of World Records

Silly season for the Guinness Book of World Records

As news breaks of the World's Largest Potato, dug up in a field in Lebanon weighing in at a mutant 11.3 kilos, and looking as appetising as the Elephant Man's mucus, the Guinness Book of Records gets ready for it's busiest part of the year as record...

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Funny story: Santa is bald!

Santa is bald!

Paparazzi pictures from Lapland have shown that Santa Claus is balder than a politician's lie. The spirit of Christmas was spotted pottering in his garden prior to his busiest day of the year, tending his marigolds wearing a Dolci and Gabana red s...

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Funny story: Santa is forced to make considerable cuts as credit crunch bites!

Santa is forced to make considerable cuts as credit crunch bites!

In his North Pole Annual Report, Santa Claus has highlighted the enormity of the massive Global Economic downturn and its' effects have caused him to make some cuts too! He reported this gloomy information to In Seine News and readers must be warned that it does not make comfortable reading; "Two of my Reindeer, Cupid and Comet have chosen to take the 'early reindeer retirement package'. Thi...

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Funny story: Santa Claus Bi-Polar

Santa Claus Bi-Polar

North and South Poles - The man known as Santa Claus, Saint Nick and Kris Kringle, who brings joy to millions of children around the world on Dec. 25 each year has been discovered to suffer debilitating bouts of depression after the holiday season en...

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Funny story: Santa Exposed

Santa Exposed

Santa Claus was exposed as a fraud today by a school teacher in Liverpool. The young teacher, Miss Take, shocked the pupils in her charge when she announced that Santa Claus was fictitious to a class of six and seven year old children. She shatter...

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Funny story: President Bush receives phone call from Santa Claus

President Bush receives phone call from Santa Claus

The President of the United States, George W Bush, today received a telemarketing call from none other than the jolly fat bloke in the red suit, yes, Santa Claus. In what is believed to be a world first, Santa Claus has decided to ask people pers...

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Funny story: Santa shops at Aldi

Santa shops at Aldi

A recent press release from the British discount supermarket chain, Aldi, has revealed that Father Christmas shops for all his Christmas goodies at their Redditch store. "We were quite surprised to see him," said Ahem Malud, manager of the store.

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Funny story: Santa Claus jailed for discrimination against Jews , but cleared of War Crimes

Santa Claus jailed for discrimination against Jews , but cleared of War Crimes

The Hague, Belgium: One of the centuries biggest and most sensational political trails came to a conclusion Tuesday when North Pole resident Santa Claus was found guilty of discrimination against people of the Jewish religion. It had been allege...

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Funny story: Santa banned from driving

Santa banned from driving

Pompous police officers from County Cork have announced that St Nicolas will not be allowed to drive his sleigh around Ireland this Christmas and are urging forces across the world to take an equally draconian stance. "It's the sherry," said Hugh...

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Funny story: Santa Claus To Retire Dec. 24

Santa Claus To Retire Dec. 24

For nearly 800 years, Christopher Rudolph Kringle, better known as Santa Claus, has been traveling across the globe every Christmas Eve, giving presents to all the good children and raping all the bad ones. But this year, he's retiring. For the fi...

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Funny story: Santa Claus To Congress: "One Trillion Dollars Or No Christmas."

Santa Claus To Congress: "One Trillion Dollars Or No Christmas."

(Washington, D.C.) In the CEO Gulfstream jet wake of General Motors, Ford and Chrysler returning to Congress in search of a 34 billion-dollar bailout, a sleigh with a vanity license plate that read simply "S. Claus" touched down in front of the Capit...

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Funny story: Santa Bypasses White House This Year

Santa Bypasses White House This Year

Santa, in a coordinated effort with the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, the Guardian Angel, the Great Pumpkin, and even the Angel of Death has put on a general boycott of the White House this season (Oh, come on, I don't have to tell you why! They don...

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Funny story: Santa Claus asks Congress for Christmas Bailout

Santa Claus asks Congress for Christmas Bailout

Washington D.C. Visitors to the nation's capitol were treated to an unusual sight Wednesday morning as an airborne sleigh powered by eight tiny reindeer and piloted by a short bearded fat man in a red suit landed on the roof the Capitol building.

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Funny story: Santa Warned By Health And Safety Executive - Christmas Expected To Drag On For Months

Santa Warned By Health And Safety Executive - Christmas Expected To Drag On For Months

The Health And Safety Executive today issued a stern warning to Santa Claus, to the effect that that he must desist from utilising unsafe practices whilst conducting his annual present delivering bonanza. 'We're not having him driving his sleigh t...

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Funny story: Claus plc. in receivership

Claus plc. in receivership

After several days of uncertainty, Claus plc. was today in the hands of receivers D'Toilette and Down. The UK institution with it's iconic Father Christmas brand appears to be well and truly stuffed. Dating back to the 1920's Claus was set up in the...

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Funny story: Santa's Elves are Stupid Little Bastards

Santa's Elves are Stupid Little Bastards

It's official! Santa Claus' North Pole elf workers are a bunch of stupid little annoying bastards. The miniature freaks toil all day and night in cramped workshops in sub-zero temperatures for the Christmas season but still find time to appear in Sa...

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Funny story: North Pole Pedophile Ring Broken

North Pole Pedophile Ring Broken

North Pole: In what North Pole police are saying is a massive child porn and pedophilia bust, Santa Claus, aka Christopher Kringle, of North Pole has been arrested. "Currently this case is under investigation and the collection of evidence is cont...

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