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Funny satire stories about Obesity

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Funny story: Gland Problem Hypothyroidism Causing Stinking Creek Man To Weigh 475 Pounds

Gland Problem Hypothyroidism Causing Stinking Creek Man To Weigh 475 Pounds

Born with a rare, debilitating glandular disorder plus a hypothyroid problem, 475-pound Stinking Creek resident, Paul Don Henderson helped himself to a fifth serving of fried catfish, mashed potatoes and popped his 21st hush puppy into his pie hole a...

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Funny story: Number Of Overweight U.S. Troops Double

Number Of Overweight U.S. Troops Double

The number of troops diagnosed as overweight or obese has more than doubled since the start of the Iraq war, yet another example of stress and strains of continuing combat deployments, according to a recent Pentagon study. "This is serious", state...

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Funny story: Pigeon Obesity reaches an all time high!

Pigeon Obesity reaches an all time high!

In 2001 approximately 0.5% of all common pigeons where obese, in 2009 the results show that 23.5% of pigeons are obese. Last week top naturist, David Attenborough visited the city of Bristol to investigate it's rarest artefacts of nature. He visit...

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Funny story: Fat people to be shot

Fat people to be shot

The UK government has introduced a radical measure to stop the ever growing rate of obesity, all fat people are to be shot. The UK has the worse record in the world for obesity with actually 1 in 2 adults classed as either being overweight or obe...

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Funny story: Number Of Obese Americans Outweigh Fatties

Number Of Obese Americans Outweigh Fatties

A Washington health group says that the number of obese American adults outweighs the number of those who are merely overweight, by a total of some 275 ton. Numbers posted by the National Center For The Bloated (NCTB) Statistics show that more tha...

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Funny story: New Blow for UK's Fattest Town

New Blow for UK's Fattest Town

Already reeling from being exposed as Britain's fattest town only days ago, residents of Barnsley now find that they have also earned the unenviable moniker of Britain's stupidest town too. Highbrow Sociologist Tristram Wankwhistle commented, "it'...

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Funny story: Obesity could possibly lower self esteem

Obesity could possibly lower self esteem

It has been known for some time that obesity poses a major risk for chronic diseases, including type 2 diabetes, cardiovascular disease, hypertension and stroke, Burton's plums, and certain forms of cancer. However scientists have now discovered t...

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Funny story: Cruise Line Announces: Travel With Us and Have Your Fat Ass Pay for Itself!

Cruise Line Announces: Travel With Us and Have Your Fat Ass Pay for Itself!

Bergen,Norway/ Cruiser News - Uff Da Cruise Lines (UFDL), announced today the commissioning of a 250 Ton ocean going "Fun Ship" capable of holding 10,000 passengers, while reducing crew to a mere 500 in keeping with demands for less restrictions on p...

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Funny story: British Muslims Banned from Riding Buses

British Muslims Banned from Riding Buses

Multiculti, England - First the British nanny state instructed its obese and slovenly subjects to do Pilates exercises at bus stops. Then Malaysian Muslim officials issued a fatwa forbidding yoga because of its corrupting Hindu influences. Hence the...

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Funny story: Fight the Flab, Keep the Cash

Fight the Flab, Keep the Cash

In an effort to combat the obesity epidemic running rife through Britain £30million has been earmarked to five towns and cities across the UK to allow the to fight the flab. Manchester Council leader Pat Carnivore is to receive £10million of the p...

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Funny story: Energy crisis over, Obese to the rescue!

Energy crisis over, Obese to the rescue!

In a surprise and innovative initiative announced today by the G7 economic countries, plans are at an advanced stage to offer initiatives to the obese to undergo liposuction. Scientists have discovered that human fat is 12.8 times more energy effi...

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Funny story: 52 Stone Birmingham Man Causes Panic On Transatlantic Flight

52 Stone Birmingham Man Causes Panic On Transatlantic Flight

A Jumbo jet made a successful landing at Newark International Airport much to the relief of passengers and crew. The flight from London Heathrow was plagued with problems from take off claimed shaken crew members due mainly to the fact that they w...

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Funny story: Fat Bastards told to diet or die

Fat Bastards told to diet or die

A group of fat bastards have been told by their doctors that they must stat losing weight immediately or risk ending up dying of fatness. A spokesperson of the 'Friends of Fat Folk" organization which represents a lot of fat fucks said that they w...

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Funny story: Obesity linked to body shape

Obesity linked to body shape

Scientist have claimed that recent studies into "Anthropomorphic Obesity" have shown that in most cases its the body shape that determines whether a person is classified as obese and not, as previously thought, the amount of chips they eat. In a s...

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Funny story: Fat Man Given Enough Rope to Hang Himself

Fat Man Given Enough Rope to Hang Himself

Morbid, Ohio - Convicted murderer, Ron (alias Big Mac) McDonald, was put out of his misery today after the Supreme Court supported his last-minute plea to be executed. McDonald had been on Ohio's death row for the past 22 years after being found guil...

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Funny story: World's Heaviest Man to Marry

World's Heaviest Man to Marry

Manuel Uribe of Monterrey, Mexico, classed as the World's Heaviest Man by the Guiness Book for weighing 1260 pounds, will marry his long time girlfriend this week. The Bride is also a person of note in the Guiness Book, having the record for being...

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Funny story: Wales Named & Shamed as Fattest Britain, Again

Wales Named & Shamed as Fattest Britain, Again

Wales has once again retained its crown as the fattest country in the UK after being named and shamed by the National Health Service. According to the latest NHS survey, five of the six fat hot spots in Britain are Welsh. Only the Shetland Island...

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