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Funny satire stories about Jesus

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Funny story: Jesus attends Gay Pride

Jesus attends Gay Pride

Revellers at the 2010 Brighton Gay Pride where shocked and thrilled when Jesus made a surprise appearance at the festival. "I couldn't believe it was him!" Said a man (or lesbian?) Jesus was in town promoting his new book, "The Bible: Uncut" w...

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Funny story: 'Jesus Wept!' crop circles are just a cosmic bead curtain design say locals

'Jesus Wept!' crop circles are just a cosmic bead curtain design say locals

Hungerford - (Cereal Hoax News): A cereal parody of a notorious Vatican hoax? Religious nutters were going into raptures today as two 'Jesus' crop circles sprang up beside the M4 in Berkshire. The wheat field etchings were immediately hailed by...

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Funny story: New Gibson Movie to Show Jesus as Woman-Hater

New Gibson Movie to Show Jesus as Woman-Hater

A new Mel Gibson-directed film intends to depict Jesus Christ as a drunken, violent sexist with a propensity for using four-letter cuss words. Gibson says the movie will demonstrate that even Jesus had a few character flaws, and we all-myself in...

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Funny story: Breitbart: "Christ was A Commie!"

Breitbart: "Christ was A Commie!"

In a Blog post that rocked the US and startled the world, Andrew Breitbart disclosed today that Jesus Christ was a communist. "There is no doubt about it," said Breitbart, "Jesus was an avowed communist, a fellow traveler, and a conspirator that soug...

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Funny story: God - a scientist way ahead of his time

God - a scientist way ahead of his time

Scientists testing theories of the bible have suggested that god was a scientist way ahead of his time. "With the advances in DNA and cloning techniques, we are very close to making a human female from the rib of a man" a leading scientist comment...

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Funny story: Jesus and Mohammad to have cage fight

Jesus and Mohammad to have cage fight

In an act designed to discover which religion is the one true faith, plans have been announced for Jesus and Mohammed to stage a cage fight. Speaking from Heaven, God said earlier that, "My boy is a lot tougher than people think he is. That 'turn...

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Funny story: Jesus Christ: The Final Interview... (Part 2)

Jesus Christ: The Final Interview... (Part 2)

Jesus Christ: The Final Interview... (Part 2) Q: Do you regularly smite people? A: Every once in a while. I dusted off the whole Malaria thing for Cheryl Cole. She annoys me. Normally, the whole free-will thing kinda doesn't work if we're throwing lightning bolts at people every time they screw up. It is a person's sense of right and wrong that keeps people straight. Q: Ok,here's goes...

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Funny story: Jesus Christ: The Last Interview...

Jesus Christ: The Last Interview...

Jesus Christ: The Last Interview, Part 1. Jesus Christ of Nazareth: From his birth in less than stellar conditions, to a non-descript young life, until he began his ministry with John the Baptist at age 30, He has made a big splash in just a few short years. Most importantly, his followers believe Him to be the Messiah, the Savior promised in the Old Testament. His detractors, including h...

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Funny story: Jesus Christ on The View: "I Shall Smite Duck Boats, Elizabeth is a Turd."

Jesus Christ on The View: "I Shall Smite Duck Boats, Elizabeth is a Turd."

Jesus Christ, ranked #2 in the Holy Triumvirate, told the cast of the View that He will smite tourist-trap Duck Boats, beginning today. Jesus, clad in Holy Robes from Vera Wang's "Fall Messiah" collection, explained that both Duck Boats and a cert...

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Funny story: Second coming of Jesus causes anti-Christianity movement

Second coming of Jesus causes anti-Christianity movement

March 27, 2510 - A much-awaited comeback by our Lord and Savior isn't quite having its intended effect. Not long after returning to earth and attempting to bring back what he calls "Real Christianity," religious leader and God Jesus Christ is find...

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Funny story: Jesus Due Back On Earth in 2050

Jesus Due Back On Earth in 2050

A poll in America asked of the second coming by Jesus. In a shock result the survey discovered over 39% of all U.S. citizens believe Jesus will return and specified 2050 as the year. God fearing folk to the "only on Sunday" Christians believe Jesu...

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Funny story: Jesus Puts Kibosh On Church Sign Punnery

Jesus Puts Kibosh On Church Sign Punnery

Jesus sent word through a spokesbeing today that it was time to put an end to "those silly one-liners" on roadside church signs that have continued to proliferate throughout the United States like a plague over the past three decades. Though noth...

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Funny story: Touchdown Jesus protests World Cup

Touchdown Jesus protests World Cup

A "warning from the Lord" was revealed this week in Monroe, Ohio, says a minister in nearby Ohnoes. Touchdown Jesus, a 60-foot plastic foam and fiberglass statue with arms raised high like a football referee, went up in smoke on June 14 when lightni...

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Funny story: "Touchdown Jesus" Slain While Seeking Medical Attention

"Touchdown Jesus" Slain While Seeking Medical Attention

After an hours-long standoff outside a hospital in Southwestern Ohio, it appears that the much beloved icon "Touchdown Jesus" has died from wounds inflicted by local police and sheriffs' deputies, as well as a National Guard unit that was called to t...

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Funny story: Jesus Guilty Of Arson?

Jesus Guilty Of Arson?

A 19 metres tall and 12 metres wide statue of Jesus Christ no longer stands after Jesus' relative, Mother Nature, was alleged to have been called in to "strike it down". In Ohio, locals were at a loss why a lightening strike choose there treasured...

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Funny story: Church to Replace "Touchdown Jesus" Statue Smote By God

Church to Replace "Touchdown Jesus" Statue Smote By God

A blasphemous landmark along Interstate 75 was destroyed by the Lord God Almighty during severe thunderstorms Monday night, but officials said Tuesday they will defy the Creator, and rebuilt it. Monroe, Ohio police state that a bolt of lightning t...

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Funny story: Fiery Destruction of "Touchdown Jesus" Ruled an Act of God.

Fiery Destruction of "Touchdown Jesus" Ruled an Act of God.

MSNBC reports that a 6-story abomination, affectionately known as "Touchdown Jesus," burnt to the ground on Monday night, June 14th, the year of our Lord 2010. The BBC reports that insurance investigators have determined the cause of its destruction...

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