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Funny satire stories about Drugs

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Funny story: Cameron Accepts Tony Montana As New Advisor

Cameron Accepts Tony Montana As New Advisor

David Cameron today confirmed that Tony Montana would be employed by the government in a drive to increase import and export figures for the UK. The self styled Cuban Mafia Man is said to have accepted the role that Lord Alan Sugar was un-able to...

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Funny story: Obama Says Mexico "Perfectly Safe" Orders Napolitano to Join 82nd Airborne In "Recreational" Jump into Acapulco!

Obama Says Mexico "Perfectly Safe" Orders Napolitano to Join 82nd Airborne In "Recreational" Jump into Acapulco!

Despite news reports of Mexico's 30,327th violent murder linked to government sponsored drug activity, Obama says travel is not restricted, and urges spring breakers to continue with plans to "go have a good time, get drunk, get laid....our youth ne...

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Funny story: Ancient first edition of High Times Encylopaedia of Recreational Thugs found inside pyramid cavity

Ancient first edition of High Times Encylopaedia of Recreational Thugs found inside pyramid cavity

Cairo - (Tootin' Khamoon): A five thousand year-old edition of an ancient almanac of Egypt's worst druggies has been discovered under the Great Pyramid of Geezer. The who's who of toxic despots, hitmen and their personal gofers was unearthed behin...

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Funny story: Church Drug Ring Smashed

Church Drug Ring Smashed

A multi million pound drug ring that used a convent outside Milan has been smashed by Italian police. Cocaine smugglers posing as pilgrims carried stashes in their prayer books in an operation organised by the convent's South American janitor.

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Funny story: A Kentucky Man Arrested After Police Find Illegal Drugs Concealed In His 'Pecker' (Penis)

A Kentucky Man Arrested After Police Find Illegal Drugs Concealed In His 'Pecker' (Penis)

OUCH HOLLER, Kentucky - Seasoned police in Ouch Holler, Kentucky say that they only thought that they had seen it all. A spokesperson for the OHPD, who was laughing so hard he could not remember his own name, stated that police officers Wydell "Bu...

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Funny story: Junky Violinist Banned From BBC Radio 3 Forever

Junky Violinist Banned From BBC Radio 3 Forever

A well known violinist has been banned from BBC Radio 3 Forever. The announcement was made on Tuesday just hours after he gave a disastrous live rendition of Vivaldi's Four Seasons...and was caught shooting up Heroin in a stationery cupboard. T...

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Funny story: Reclusive Curmudgeon and Biochemist "Frankie The J", Invents Cure-All Drug

Reclusive Curmudgeon and Biochemist "Frankie The J", Invents Cure-All Drug

Normally shy and privacy minded biochemist only known as "Frankie The J", has released a series of findings from laboratory drug trials to the New England Journal of Medicine this week, confirming the potency of a newly patented cure-all drug. Rep...

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Funny story: Colombian police smash pigeon drug cartel!

Colombian police smash pigeon drug cartel!

A group of pigeon drug couriers has been caught "pigeon-footed" delivering drugs to Colombian prisons. Regular flights from the Colombian coca fields to the prison were no problem for the pigeons, they're all "Homeys". The only problem was that t...

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Funny story: Battle To Release Skin Patch For Alzheimer's Treatment

Battle To Release Skin Patch For Alzheimer's Treatment

A skin patch to treat Alzheimer's and help jog people's memory is to be made available on the NHS after a five year battle. Exelon can be taken orally or worn as a patch. But the patch has been shown to reduce side effects such as nausea and vomit...

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Funny story: New Drug Only Gives Side Effects!

New Drug Only Gives Side Effects!

Eli Willy, a major drug and pharmaceutical manufacturer has announced a revolutionary new drug that only causes side effects. Marketed under the slogan, "If you think yesterday was bad," the drug will be on the market in the near future and will only...

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Funny story: Drugs Make You More Aware...More Aware...More Aware....

Drugs Make You More Aware...More Aware...More Aware....

The relief guard approached the other guard as he was on his watch. As usual Cecil's mind was fixed on some inner scene; his eyes half closed and blank, his face dumb and peaceful like a cow in a field of abundant clover. It struck a chord of anger in Myron to see him this way and there arose in him the desire to smash him in the chest with the butt of his gun. "Cecil!" he stated in a half voic...

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Funny story: Rolling Stones Stoned Confusion For Ronnie

Rolling Stones Stoned Confusion For Ronnie

A top ego expert fears for the sanity of Ronnie Spector, ex-wife of iconic-but-jailed record producer Phil Spector. Apparently her ego has grown to such proportions that while skimming through Rolling Stone Keith Richards's autobiography she assum...

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Funny story: Lindsay Lohan In Rehab Rampage Rummaging for Cat Nip!

Lindsay Lohan In Rehab Rampage Rummaging for Cat Nip!

Lindsay Lohan, Hollywood's most confused former teen idol, was said to have gone on a rampage whilst still undergoing rehab in one of Beverly Hill's most exclusive get aways for wayward souls. According to an inside source, the clinic, said to be...

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Funny story: Mexican drug dealers have control over New York City

Mexican drug dealers have control over New York City

Police authorities believe that a crime lord from Sinaloa, Mexico is behind the dumping of four bodies alongside a deserted parkway at a beach on New York's Long Island. "We have evidence that points to the fact that a serial killer is being used...

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Funny story: This Medication May Have Some Side Effects

This Medication May Have Some Side Effects

You may experience some side effects when taking this medication. You may experience memory lapses to varying degrees. You may forget to take your daily dose. (If you do, simply return to the daily schedule. Do not take two doses together.) You may forget where you have placed your bottle of medication. (We suggest leaving the bottle on your night stand or otherwise out in the open. You...

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Funny story: City Discovered In Drug Smuggling Tunnel

City Discovered In Drug Smuggling Tunnel

A drug smuggling tunnel was discovered today in Tijuana, it crossed from Mexico into America. The DEA was shocked and surprised when they found the tunnel was not only a tunnel, but there was a small city thriving there. There was a grocery store, m...

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Funny story: Tryptophan Poisoning Used As New Date Rape Drug

Tryptophan Poisoning Used As New Date Rape Drug

A new trend is blazing across America, Tryptophan Poisoning as the new date rape drug. Young men are finding that it is easier to get a girl to eat turkey than to slip something into her drink. Even better take her out for chicken, according to news...

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