London - A program allowing parents, special interest groups, charities etc to open their own training grounds for wackjob offspring should not discriminate against 'normal' minorities a Glib Dem report has said. The controversial 'freak school' s...
With the start of the new academic year, schools throughout the US state of Florida are beginning to enforce a new law that bans students from wearing revealing attire. The School Teachers and Friends' Union (STFU) have called for such a ban to go na...
HARFOLD, Vermont--By a unanimous vote of 9-0, Harfold Academy's school board decided not to add Chinese to the Academy's offerings of French and Spanish, issuing a statement that, "The fucking Chinese killed this town." Virtually all topics discus...
The recent trends of Unschoolers, who basically are self taught on everything from spelling to physics, share a belief that children do not need classrooms and organized education to learn. Rather, they are on their own to do what they want anytime...
Eco Clubs are being encouraged in schools around Ontario. Teachers and students are encouraged to be eco-friendly. I have no problem with teaching children to look after their environment but I questioned the sanity of students being asked to bring 'garbageless' lunches on Fridays. Why? Because this is NOT actually helping the environment. The garbage still exists but it is in a different...
Congressional leaders finalized an historic organizational merger between the National Education Association and the National Rifle Association just before the July 4th holiday break, bringing together two non governmental organizations with immensel...
The National Union of Schoolchildren (NUS) has called a country-wide strike, causing thousands of schools across the UK to close. A lack of chaos is predicted as children and teachers stay at home. The NUS has promised to continue the strike until...
Leading education experts have today pointed out that proposed incentives to attract teachers are poorly thought through and will not work in the real world. Unions, school governors and parent bodies have pointed out that there is no recognition...
A recent survey of maths teachers at secondary schools in England has revealed that nearly ninety percent believe themselves to be above average. Worst still, they have been told that ninety percent believe themselves to be above average, and do not...
Under 16's in Britain have thrown the full weight of their substance addled minds behind the global 'war on drugs', saying it has never been easier to perpetuate their habits. The Global Commission on Drug Policy has issued a report calling for...
Big Mary Horner, mother of Little Jack Horner, has critised the Devonshire educational establishment for putting obstacles in the way of her son's progression through school. Following many other councils, Devon has recently brought in a celebrity...
For some children, boarding school is a wonderful, exciting, character-building adventure. For others, it can be a living hell, punctuated with homesickness, bullying, bedwetting and the odd randy junior house master. For those who struggle with the separation from mummy and daddy, and the arrival at a cold, dark and forboding boarding school, the following is intended as a guide to beating the...
CCN (Crazy Cal News) MAGNOLIA, TEXAS - "The Tribune," the Magnolia newspaper, reports that the first grader brought a loaded gun to Ellisor Elementary on May 9th. The gun father said the 9mm Beretta wasn't loaded when the student got home. The studen...
A 12-year-old boy, known only as "A boy" (he said he will issue a super ink-junction - i.e. stuff our heads in the ink well - if we mention his name or where his school is) who wore a skirt in class and who originally said he did it as a protest agai...
COVENTRY, W. MIDS., ENG. - A local secondary school has caused the entire Coventry city area to be put on lockdown after a new mutation has caused a harmless bacteria to morph into a pathogen. The pathogen classified as X/11-G, after the room (X)...
Teaching union representatives are furious that pupils expelled for carrying weapons, using a drugs and attacking teachers are being allowed back into the classroom. Figures reveal that almost 500 pupils barred from lessons for serious incidents i...
As I recall, I was grounded for most of Reagan's first Presidential term. I was a "F--k Up", so my mother seared into my psyche as if branding a cow. In light of this fact, attendance in school would have cut great swaths in the time I had to socialize. Recognizing that there were only two available choices, and that the obvious binary opposition to attendance at school is truancy, I decided t...
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