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Funny satire stories about Olympics

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Funny story: Olympic Medals to be decided by general public vote via phone in system

Olympic Medals to be decided by general public vote via phone in system

In a refreshing change to how Olympic medals will be awarded the IOC has announced that the public will decide which of the first three competitors in each event will receive the Gold, Silver and Bronze medals during the London games. The concept,...

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Funny story: MoD Admits Soldiers Volunteering to Return to Afghanistan Rather than Patrol in London During Olympics

MoD Admits Soldiers Volunteering to Return to Afghanistan Rather than Patrol in London During Olympics

The Ministry of Defence has confirmed reports that many soldiers have slapped in requests to return to Afghanistan early rather than be deployed in London during the Olympics. Commanding Officers claim that many of their men, when faced with the p...

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Funny story: "Hoodie" Gang steal surface-to-air missiles stationed on London tower block to protect Olympic Games

"Hoodie" Gang steal surface-to-air missiles stationed on London tower block to protect Olympic Games

Several surface-to-air missiles and their launchers have been stolen from the roof of a Leytonstone tower block in East London by a gang of teenage "hoodies" who are threatening to shoot down police helicopters with them who try and film the upcoming...

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Funny story: Football Gossip & comments 10th July 2012

Football Gossip & comments 10th July 2012

Various Ryan Giggs will captain Team GB football team at the Olympics. Well at least his wife will know where he is for 90 minutes. Roberto Mancini has signed a new five year contract to stay at Manchester City after interest from the Russian FA for their national job. It must have been the lovely Manchester weather and mushy peas that made his mind up. Talksport Arsenal are figh...

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Funny story: Olympic Shock: Canada to win 30 Gold Medals with Fast White Suits

Olympic Shock: Canada to win 30 Gold Medals with Fast White Suits

Toronto (SAPP) - The Canadian Olympic Team has entered a new era of competitiveness in the world of sports. Constantly trying to play catch-up to their rivals to the south, Canadian Track and Field is always yearning for that edge to beat the America...

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Funny story: Olympics: Nepal registers Yeti for 100 metres

Olympics: Nepal registers Yeti for 100 metres

The Nepalese Olympic Committee was ridiculed last night after announcing its intention to field The Yeti in the 100 metres sprint at London 2012. During a press conference in Kathmandu, Committee Chairman Prem Hayu insisted that the time was righ...

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Funny story: Boris Johnson realises they forgot about the equestrian events for the London Olympics

Boris Johnson realises they forgot about the equestrian events for the London Olympics

Loveable, laughable, but not laudable, buffoon and mayor of London, Boris Johnson has admitted that with only days left before the Olympics is due to begin, that they completely forgot about the equestrian events. "What can I say?" said Boris, sou...

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Funny story: David Beckham Will Now Appear at the Olympics

David Beckham Will Now Appear at the Olympics

After last week being sensationally omitted from the Olympic British Soccer team David Beckham, the LA Galaxy midfielder and world soccer icon, has been offered another more suitable role during the Olympic Games. Beckham, 38, will now appear at t...

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Funny story: Adele's son predicted to compete in 2032 Olympics

Adele's son predicted to compete in 2032 Olympics

Scientists have made some surprisingly long term predictions about Adele's unborn son Dylan including the first car he will drive, his first fight and which glamour models he will date. Using a technique known as DNA 'embalmoscopy', scientists pre...

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Funny story: The 2012 Summer Olympics: The Unusual Bake Sale That The African Olympic Team From Lower Zamgola Is Having In Order To Raise Airfare To London

The 2012 Summer Olympics: The Unusual Bake Sale That The African Olympic Team From Lower Zamgola Is Having In Order To Raise Airfare To London

TARZANVILLE, Lower Zamgola - The government of the African country of Lower Zamgola has been immersed in economic havoc since the devaluing of its paper money known as the tambuska. Prior to Valentine's Day, one U.S. dollar was equal to 197 tambus...

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Funny story: The 2012 Summer Olympics: The Reason Why The Pakistani Olympic Team President Is Furious With The International Olympic Committee

The 2012 Summer Olympics: The Reason Why The Pakistani Olympic Team President Is Furious With The International Olympic Committee

KARACHI, Pakistan - The president of the Pakistani Olympic team Kandarbad Peshabdu is extremely upset with the International Olympic Committee. President Peshabdu has just received a text message from the IOC informing him that the entire Pakistan...

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Funny story: Olympics: David Beckham misses out on Stuart Pearces 'Team GB Squad'

Olympics: David Beckham misses out on Stuart Pearces 'Team GB Squad'

The world of British sport was in shock today when Team GB Olympic Football team boss Stuart Pearce named his squad for the Games and local lad made good David 'OBE' Beckham wasn't on it. 'Pearcy' had to reduce his squad down from 35 to 18, and co...

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Funny story: U.S. Olympian Lolo Jones Sacrifices Virginity for Olympic Dream

U.S. Olympian Lolo Jones Sacrifices Virginity for Olympic Dream

Eugene, OR - Self-declared "virgin" and Olympic hurdler Lolo Jones was having a rough season. Four years after a stumble on the ninth hurdle cost her a gold medal at the Beijing games, Jones didn't seem to have even a remote shot at redemption. Enter...

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Funny story: British Female Athletes to Wear Traditional Clothing During The Olympics in Solidarity With Other Cultures

British Female Athletes to Wear Traditional Clothing During The Olympics in Solidarity With Other Cultures

British Female athlete's competing at next month's Olympic Games will wear traditional clothing in an unprecedented act of solidarity with other competing nation's female athletes who will also be wearing traditional dress. Welsh shot-putter Alwyn...

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Funny story: Syria Boycott Olympics

Syria Boycott Olympics

Syria has said that that countries athletes will not compete at next month's Olympic Games in London in protest at what Syria claims is a consorted effort by the West to undermine that country's sovereignty. The pull out means that several event...

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Funny story: Usain Bolt Promises To Run 100m In "Under 8 Seconds"

Usain Bolt Promises To Run 100m In "Under 8 Seconds"

World champion 100m sprinter Mr Usain Bolt has stated publicly that he believes he can smash his own 9.58-second world record to "smithereens" at next month's London 2012 Olympic Games, and that he fully intends to regain the title he won in Beijing...

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Funny story: Olympic Terrorist Plot Quashed in London

Olympic Terrorist Plot Quashed in London

London UK: The London Summer Olympics opened on schedule July 27, 2012 with the lighting of the Olympic flame. What most spectators and athletes didn't know were the events that transpired the evening before. The entire Olympic Sports Complex (Oly...

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