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Funny satire stories about London 2012

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Funny story: Brentford to become the Cultural Centre for London

Brentford to become the Cultural Centre for London

In line with the 2012 Olympics and with London in the spot-light, the Mayor's Office has designated Brentford in the sleepy suburbs of West London as the cutting edge of a true London experience for visitors from the rest of the world. Unlike pr...

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Funny story: Call Girls Will Use Priority Lanes on Roads During London Olympics - Speedy Vice Service Guaranteed for VIPs

Call Girls Will Use Priority Lanes on Roads During London Olympics - Speedy Vice Service Guaranteed for VIPs

As London continues its Olympic countdown, Mayor Boris Johnson has given the go ahead for an historic decision, that he argues will have positive long term benefits for the city and leave a lasting legacy for all communities. This follows months of b...

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Funny story: Olympic venues to become prisons as London cancels the event.

Olympic venues to become prisons as London cancels the event.

As Parliament re-sat today the government had to make some difficult decisions. David Cameron announced their plans late today. "We need to realise that we will not be able to fill these stadiums, velodrome etcetera now. People will be far too sca...

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Funny story: Olympic Games Countdown

Olympic Games Countdown

As the seconds tick down everyone is feeling proud. We are staging the Olympic Games and with a year to go we have 365 more days of pontificating drivel to give to the nation. We may not have the money the Chinese put into their Games but we are o...

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Funny story: London 2012 Olympics countdown continues

London 2012 Olympics countdown continues

Today it is 366 days until it begins. Tomorrow it will be 365 days, and after that comes 364 days. It's the London Olympics of course! Most of the building work and preparation is well on schedule. The enormous darts hall has been completed alread...

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Funny story: Olympic Torch to be carried through the streets of Middlesbrough, North East England on its way to London

Olympic Torch to be carried through the streets of Middlesbrough, North East England on its way to London

Most residents of Middlesbrough, England, were ecstatic when they heard that the Olympic Torch will be carried through their town en route to London for the opening of the 2012 Olympic Games. The 'handing over' of the torch will take place at The...

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Funny story: Norway killer Breivik 'a dead ringer for Lloyds TSB London 2012 TV ad animated character'

Norway killer Breivik 'a dead ringer for Lloyds TSB London 2012 TV ad animated character'

London - Someone at the Norwegian embassy has complained to the Broadcasting Standards Council. A TV cartoon character in the Lloyds TSB Olympic Torch Relay ad 'looks exactly like Anders Behring Breivik' and is causing widespread confusion. The...

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Funny story: Blade Runner Qualifies for London 2012

Blade Runner Qualifies for London 2012

Oscar Pistorius, the Blade Runner, has run a fast enough qualifying time for the London 2012 games after a performance of 45.07 seconds for the 400 metres. However, doubts have been cast over the South African's true identity. After much unashamed...

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Funny story: 2012 Olympic Games - in GREECE?

2012 Olympic Games - in GREECE?

Britain breathed a big sigh of relief last week when hearing the news that we'd not be required to contribute to the next bailout pot of cash for Greece - Though we will still have to pour another £1billion or so down the Greek drain via the International Monetary Fund. Personally I'm not convinced we've been let off that lightly. And as the saying goes, 'The devil is in the details'. EU presid...

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Funny story: London Olympics 2012 - Hundreds Of Tickets Available - All Events

London Olympics 2012 - Hundreds Of Tickets Available - All Events

Despite widespread complaints from failed ticket applicants about the 2012 London Olympics ticket allocation fiasco, there is at least one man who can't understand what all the fuss is about. Solly Grundy of Manchester, claims to have hundreds of...

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Funny story: Olympic Games 2012 results now available!

Olympic Games 2012 results now available!

Olympic HQ, Stratford: Results are now coming for the Games of the XVZWV Olympiad. In first place, 5,000 tickets for Britain's richest man worth £29.8billion. In second place, 1,000 tickets to Gaddafi's eldest son Muhammad, as head of Libyas' Olympic committee. Currently blocked by the International Olympics Committee (IOC). In last place, 000 tickets [NIL] to see the Olympic games, are...

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Funny story: Olympic Torch design revealed

Olympic Torch design revealed

Seb Coe has displayed the new design for the Olympic Torch to the world. The new design was meant to convey the great history of the competition, be light enough to carry on the five thousand round trip, and sturdy enough to survive the countless tim...

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Funny story: 2012 Olympic Logo 'Still Shit' says Poll

2012 Olympic Logo 'Still Shit' says Poll

It was first unveiled to great controversy four years ago. It has been accused of spelling out the word 'Zion', described as a 'distorted Swastika' and 'Lisa Simpson performing fellatio'. Now, with just over a year until the opening ceremony, 99.99%...

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Funny story: Millions miss out on London 2012 tickets and escape bankruptcy

Millions miss out on London 2012 tickets and escape bankruptcy

The news that nearly 2 million people have failed to win any Olympic tickets for London 2012 has been met with great relief up and down the country. Hundreds of thousands of people have expressed their delight in not having to sell their organs to wa...

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Funny story: Olympic Torch Route Unveiled

Olympic Torch Route Unveiled

The 8,000 mile route along which the Olympic Torch will be carried in the UK before making its way to London 2012 has been unveiled by Lord Coe, chairman of the organising committee. The torch will travel for 70 days through all the major towns a...

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Funny story: David Beckham to play major part in 2012 Olympics

David Beckham to play major part in 2012 Olympics

As rumoured in the press, former England football player and special ambassador for the moronically tattooed has admitted that he will be playing a special part in the 2012 Olympics. Current speculation suggests that Mr Beckham might perhaps be su...

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Funny story: 'It's not fair, he's got no legs', moan UK Athletes

'It's not fair, he's got no legs', moan UK Athletes

The world of athletics is in turmoil as legless athlete, Oscar Pistorius runs what could be an Olympic qualification time. The debate goes on as to whether or not he should or shouldn't be allowed to enter alongside 'able-bodied' athletes, bearing in...

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