Tampa, Florida - A man with a check to cash deliberately tried to circumvent the policies that his bank had in place to combat fraud. He deliberately had himself born with no arms, then tried to cash that check with no thumbprint. He also mocked the...
A Louisberg resident sold his life insurance policy to the Rob-u-quick Bank last month after seeing the ads on TV targeted to seniors. Mr. T. J. Mc Corkle of Louisburg, NC and his wife of forty-seven years were having a hard time living on their smal...
Police in Denver, Colorado have issued arrest warrants for six cheerleaders after a daring raid on a city bank this morning, in which 16 customers were assaulted, and three more had their faces sat on. The incident came only hours after the Dallas...
Beijing, China - Apart from the usual communistic practices, China has invented a new method of capital punishment. A pool is filled with saltwater and the condemned are placed in the pool. This is done on a day in which storms are expected.
Reykjavík - News on the warf from the fishing captain of the Smelly Gut fishing vessel here, Captain Vjernikisivk is that his whalemeat is soon to be the coin of the realm. With the demise of the Icelandic monetary system, and the closing of all...
Sioux Falls (DP) - In an unanimous vote, the Senate approved a privately owned bank to takeover the Federal Reserve to manage the nation's money supply. Obama said, "It is time to cut the friction of the middleman out and work directly with the n...
In a spectacularly brave move, British Chancellor and All round purveyor of Cock Cheese Alistair Darling has announced that he intends to head the Tories off at the pass and revolutionise Financial Regulation before the next election. In plans ann...
Recently released from Prison, Ronnie Biggs, the famed Great Train Robber, has sent the British Justice system into chaos today, by robbing 3 banks and fleeing to Rio. The man who was freed on compassionate grounds due to being an a invalid, follo...
Swine Flu is being welcomed as the perfect remedy for the global financial crisis. Sir Keith Williams, of financial services company Takezone PLC, explains how a flu pandemic could address the underlying factors that triggered the credit crunch an...
Tyra Banks and her crew have been visiting Metropolis, Illinois and the Superman Museum to do film footage for her upcoming reality show, "Who's America's Next Superman?". Banks stated that she and her crew had a great time, especially the females.
London's banks were braced for another round of Kamikaze plane attacks today as bankers sought new ways to negotiate large bonuses. Arselicker Darling condemned the 'Kamikaze' bankers today. "These chaps are out of order. Don't they know that ther...
London - (Rioters): UK Prime Monster Gorgon Brown has been moved to a secure, padded-wall facility following reports that mad-as-hell ABN Amro banker Huibert Boumeester has escaped from his high-tech Canary Wharf (B)lair, armed with a cache of loaded...
World Bank boss Robert Zoellick called a press conference this morning. The gathering of financial journalists from around the world was astonished to hear him announce that the global recession happened because of a simple mistake. He went on...
Following on from a BBC expose and a Westminster Debate, bankers are leaving their jobs on mass and applying for a job at a well known Scottish ex Bank. There are reports of queues outside the Edinburgh Head Office as over 1000 bankers apply for a jo...
Rich bankers were today warned that their excessive lifestyles could be putting their lives at risk, following the fatal shooting, with a gun, of a rich French banker. The banker, who cannot be named, even though the case has been described in det...
It has emerged today that Gordon Brown bribed Tony Blair to leave office and claimed the amount back on expenses. The claim for £40,000 was requested in cash on 1st May 2007, payable in used tenners to Gordon himself. A parliamentary spokesperson...
After recent media hysteria over MPs expenses, it is now the bank bosses' turn to be exposed. The Daily Dredge has released details of all bank chiefs' expenses over the past year. Shockingly it shows a culture of businessmen willing to blatantly...
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