That terrific tearing noise many heard yesterday during the very first hour of the Rush Limbaugh show was apparently not his pants this time. Almost instantly, the webcam was shut off and people were left with a seated Rush Limbaugh with a surpris...
With many Americans unable to change life long eating habits, a new medical procedure coupled with prosthetic pants may be the desirable answer. Developed by Dr. C. Emmett Sakatt a colorectal surgical specialist with extraordinarily long fingers,...
A Europe-wide TV channel is to be launched next week, featuring the very best in European interest programming. The channel, to be called EURO-TV, will do its best to avoid the problems encountered by similar now-defunct channels. Those problems were largely caused by the multilingual nature of Europe. EURO-TV will try to avoid these by not broadcasting any speech. Entertainment will be provid...
The Government has unveiled its latest weapon against the rising tide of dog owners who do not pick up after their dogs have placed one on the pavement or in the park. The roll of the sniffers will be to sniff the dog turd, and using highly traine...
London - Pikey elements among the ragbag of Occupy protesters have been blamed for taking a dump on the red carpet at St Paul's. Clerics wielding disinfectant, mops and rubber waders are said to be fuming after human waste was discovered near the...
Experts warned yesterday that the economic crisis could see the return of a menace not seen on our streets for decades: the white dog turd. The publicly-funded 'Study Into Potential Indicators Of Financial Disaster' found that during the 70's and...
David Walliams, better known as the gay assistant to a gay British Prime Minister, amongst other gay roles, has really been swallowing some "crap". Outside of his day job, David does some marvellous charity work, riding bikes from John o Groats to...
The saga of Harry Potter may have concluded, but fans of myth and fantasy need not despair - evolutionists are still manufacturing fairy stories with a vengeance. Archaeopteryx, one of the mythical poster-children of the evolution fallacy has been...
You have probably heard the phrase, "faster than pizza going through a dog." Well, students from a high school in Denver, Colorado concocted a science project to find out how fast that was; an experiment where they tracked how long it took to induc...
Depressed? Feeling a tad suicidal are we? Never mind. Doesn't bother me in the least. But here are ten top really crap things to do if you feel like popping your own cork. 1 - Play Sinead O'Connor's 'Nothing Compares 2 U.' You don't really want to listen to this. What you need to do is convince yourself that you're not really suicidal at all, and that life's great. Life's not really...
The government are to reward responsible dog owners who pick up their dog's excrement. Under a new scheme, due to start in October next year, the dog owners will be paid £1 for every dog turd they present at their local Post Office. To ensure thei...
PHOENIX (PoooWatch) - According to commercial real estate mogul, Dr. Onzipay Amegay, the high-walled restroom stall is quickly becoming a rarity in the modern workplace. It's also becoming more common for executives to move out of their stalls and s*...
Started in a dusty attic in Keyport, NJ, CuloLimpia, Inc. is on top of the As Seen On TV infomercial world, after it's top-selling product, Sh-tFloss wins the coveted J.D. Power Best of Colorectal Maintenance Award for 2011. "While we are proud to...
Residents of Newby, Isle of Wight are NOT going to be watching the Royal Wedding on t.v. When asked "Why not?", Mrs. Irma Hoar, of Cheating Crescent, Newby, answered, "Well, for crying out loud, the world didn't 'stand still' when me and our lad got married 32 years back. It's only a bloody wedding for Christ sake. Folk get married every bloody day. What difference will THIS wedding make...
A gay man has shocked his neighbours by revealing that a spoof writer for the local newspaper is an invention of his - and emerged from his anus. Larry Sabu, 20, said he was at home in bed, sitting on his lovers face one day, when he decided to co...
Sarah Palin, one time Vice President nominee and possible candidate for the 2012 Presidential election has told reporters that strange crap circles have began showing up in her backyard in Alaska. "They're like those little mushroom rings but thes...
In what has been ably-described by a woman in the Potteries as "the most gruesome moment of my week", the woman from Stoke-on-Trent has told how she discovered a potty full of shit underneath her son's bed. The woman, whose name you all know, rela...
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