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Funny satire stories about New England Patriots

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Funny story: "Tom Brady's haircut is so gay," say millions of fans who wish Tom Brady played for their team

"Tom Brady's haircut is so gay," say millions of fans who wish Tom Brady played for their team

EVERYWHERE - NFL fans have expressed contempt and derision of Tom Brady, New England Patriots quarterback, for his new ponytail haircut. Polls indicate the overwhelming majority of criticism of Brady's hairstyle comes from people who desperately wish...

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Funny story: After Losing Playoff Game, Tom Brandy Admits the Patriots Chances of Winning the Super Bowl are Slim

After Losing Playoff Game, Tom Brandy Admits the Patriots Chances of Winning the Super Bowl are Slim

Foxborough, Ma - In an interview with ESPN Monday Patriots quarterback Tom Brady says he hasn't given up hope of winning the Super Bowl quite yet. "Sure, we lost the game," said Brady, "Still, I'm still not sure how this affects our Super Bowl chance...

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Funny story: Fox News Remembers Fallen "Patriots"

Fox News Remembers Fallen "Patriots"

New York, NY - A somber mood has fallen over the employees at Fox News, as the nation's leading cable news network is spending the day remembering a group of Patriots that were brutally murdered Sunday evening in Foxborough, MA. Sources close to the...

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Funny story: Bill Belichick Headed to the Longhorns?

Bill Belichick Headed to the Longhorns?

Unsubstantiated reports have insinuated that sources close to, or in the same area code as, the New England Patriots' Bill Belichick have it on "good authority" that the two-time NFL Coach of the Year and three-time Super Bowl winner has been contact...

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Funny story: Bill Belichick Leaves Patriots For Life Insurance Sales Position

Bill Belichick Leaves Patriots For Life Insurance Sales Position

Bill Belichick, head coach for the New England Patriots, announced today that he is leaving the Patriots, effective immediately, for his life-long dream job, Sales Representative for Massachusetts Mutual Life Insurance. Belichick, whose resume in...

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Funny story: Tom Brady Vows to Shave his Head & Wax his Balls if Patriots Lose to Jets Monday Night!

Tom Brady Vows to Shave his Head & Wax his Balls if Patriots Lose to Jets Monday Night!

Appearing relaxed and confidant, NE Patriots quarterback Tom Brady, reclining in front of his fireplace clad in flannel boxer shorts and calf high sheepskin house slippers, said he would 'go commando' if his team loses to those "loud mouth fat NY Ba...

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Funny story: New England Quarterback Brady In Car Wreck!

New England Quarterback Brady In Car Wreck!

Tom Brady of the New England Patriots was involved in a two-car wreck this morning and, although the hospital thinks that he's OK, some bad effects could show up later as the wreck was pretty bad. Witnesses said he appeared shaken, but the team sa...

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Funny story: Pats Open Can Of Whup-Ass On Sorry Bucs But Tom Brady Flees London In Fear

Pats Open Can Of Whup-Ass On Sorry Bucs But Tom Brady Flees London In Fear

Pats QB Tom Brady, who earlier led his team to a standout victory over the Tampa Bay Buccaneers by a 35-7 margin tonight fled London after apparent security threats compromised his personal safety. Brady was rushed directly from Wembley Stadium to...

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Funny story: Pats Win at Wembley; Skoob Loses at Home by Failing to Gain Brady Interview for the Mrs.!

Pats Win at Wembley; Skoob Loses at Home by Failing to Gain Brady Interview for the Mrs.!

British soccer fans were treated to a good ole ass whippin today as the New England Patriots flogged the winless Tampa Bay Bucs 28-7, and introduced footy fans to the refreshing 'boy wonder', Marvelous Tom Brady. The lop sided game was kept intere...

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Funny story: Barney Frank Proposes New Patriot Act

Barney Frank Proposes New Patriot Act

Congressman Barney Frank (D-MA) introduced a new Patriot Act in the House Tuesday. Unlike the original legislation, this one is focused on the New England Patriots instead of on terrorism. "At a time when the federal government is bailing out a va...

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Funny story: Lance Armstrong to Take QB Job for Patriots

Lance Armstrong to Take QB Job for Patriots

In a startling turn of events, 7-time Tour de France winner Lance Armstrong has not only come out of retirement but has been signed by the New England Patriots to play quarterback in place of the injured Tom Brady. "I was watching the game at home...

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Funny story: Belichick Puts Bounty On Karma

Belichick Puts Bounty On Karma

Bill Belichick, the New England Patriots Head Coach, was more animated than usual at this morning's Press Conference. There was, of course, only one topic on the agenda - how serious was Tom Brady's injury. "Tom's fucked. I've analyzed it this w...

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Funny story: New England Patriots "Spy" Tapes - Not What NFL Commissioner Expected

New England Patriots "Spy" Tapes - Not What NFL Commissioner Expected

Former New England Patriots employee turned over the eight tapes to National Football Commissioner. All eight tapes were to show footage of the teams that were videotaped and the value of the tape's content that New England received from knowing...

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Funny story: Bill Belichick overheats in short sleeve hooded sweatshirt; leaves game early for medical attention

Bill Belichick overheats in short sleeve hooded sweatshirt; leaves game early for medical attention

GLENDALE, AZ. Apparently Bill Belichick couldn't handle the heat, so he had to get out of the kitchen.

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Funny story: Belichick, Patriots Face Blackmail Controversy

Belichick, Patriots Face Blackmail Controversy

Shortly after the New England Patriots lost the Super Bowl to the New York Giants Sunday night, a new controversy broke out over cheating by the Patriots and their coach, Bill Belichick. Belichick allegedly blackmailed referees in an effort to influe...

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Funny story: Campaign Acknowledges Improper Videotaping

Campaign Acknowledges Improper Videotaping

Hot on the heels of the New England Patriots' scandal involving the possible videotaping of their opponent's practices and signals, a similar videotaping incident has now come to light in the political arena.

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Funny story: Patriots BioGate

Patriots BioGate

The Patriots were fined $250,000 and a first round draft pick by Commissioner Gooddal for illegally video tapping the Jets defensive hand signals. The Commissioner said yesterday during his press conference in Arizona that he does not believe the Pat...

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