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Funny story: Local Man Abused Yet Again - This Time On A Monday!

Local Man Abused Yet Again - This Time On A Monday!

Local man, Martin Shuttlecock, has revealed that he was subjected to unwarranted abuse, yet again, but this time, unusually, it was on a Monday. The incident occurred as Shuttlecock was en-route to work on his bicycle, and as he stopped off at a cash...

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Funny story: Arsenal Against Chelsea Best Part Of 'Day To Forget' For Local Man

Arsenal Against Chelsea Best Part Of 'Day To Forget' For Local Man

A local man claims that Saturday will be a day to forget. Mr Gideon Lambrusco claimed to be "minding his own business" when his day just started to unravel for no apparent reason. "I just don't get it," said Mr Lambrusco, 46, of Panfried Garden...

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Funny story: World Dungaree Championships Cause Travel Chaos In Scooterville

World Dungaree Championships Cause Travel Chaos In Scooterville

Police in the small NJ town of Scooterville (pop 248) have reported travel mayhem as visitors pour into the town for the 3rd Annual World Dungaree Championships. Sherriff Teddy Cockspur, the only law enforcement officer in the parish, said that t...

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Funny story: Scooterville In Unlikely Olympic Bid

Scooterville In Unlikely Olympic Bid

Scooterville, the famous town in New Jersey (pop 250), has launched an unlikely bid for the 2030 Olympic games. Famed for its tree house Post Office and home of a former jeopardy contestant, Scooterville claims it will start work on infrastructure...

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Funny story: Irrelevant News Story Dominates Headlines

Irrelevant News Story Dominates Headlines

An irrelevant news story is dominating headlines in the tiny town of Scooterville, New Jersey. Scootterville (population 245) is famed for being the home of inventor Larry Cockspur, who in 1956 created the first overcoat with wings, sadly though,...

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Funny story: Local Man Planning to Do Something

Local Man Planning to Do Something

Local Man and One Time Wannabe Entrepreneur, Seaton Carew, today announced that he was considering a return to actually doing something to see if it would be noticed. Carew, previously an ex-thespian and almost ran, has admitted that he hasn't don...

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Funny story: Local Man Pleased With YouTube Singing Debut

Local Man Pleased With YouTube Singing Debut

Local man, Martin Shuttlecock, emerged from his Shuttlecock Mansions abode in Titchfield this evening, in order to address reporters, who were covering his latest internet/multimedia smash: The Bright Side. Which shamelessly promotes the best selling...

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Funny story: Local Woman Recalls Naked In The Shower Hot Air Balloon Incident

Local Woman Recalls Naked In The Shower Hot Air Balloon Incident

Local woman, Anne Shuttlecock, wife of disgraced alcoholic internet rambler, Martin, today recalled an incident from her murky past, to the Titchfield Women's Support Coalition, and was greeted by gasps of abject horror, from her audience of middle E...

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Funny story: Carpe Diem - Dullness And Mediocrity Sieze The Day In Satire Hell - Says Local Man

Carpe Diem - Dullness And Mediocrity Sieze The Day In Satire Hell - Says Local Man

In a totally uninspiring speech this evening at Grosvenor House, self styled and absolutely unfunny local man, Martin Shuttlecock (Who apparently faces a raft of real life issues, such as having false teeth, a drink problem, a wonky knee, homosexual...

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Funny story: Local Man Claims To Have Been "Sloffensibly Blurred" - Whatever That Means

Local Man Claims To Have Been "Sloffensibly Blurred" - Whatever That Means

Local man, wastrel, ne'er do well, habitual drunkard, gambler, closet homosexual, dwarf, malcontent, former football hooligan, philanderer, alleged rapist, and alleged torturer of puppies and kittens, Martin Shuttlecock, this evening announced that h...

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Funny story: Local Man Caught Up In Bicycle Without A Saddle Fiasco

Local Man Caught Up In Bicycle Without A Saddle Fiasco

Local man, Martin Shuttlecock, today became involved in a bizarre series of verbal exchanges after parking and locking up his bicycle in the local Co-Op car park. It seems that as Shuttlecock was in store, stocking up on Stella Artois in order to fue...

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Funny story: Local Man Enjoying Gay Honeymoon With Thespian - Long Suffering Wife Not Amused

Local Man Enjoying Gay Honeymoon With Thespian - Long Suffering Wife Not Amused

A local man, who smokes too much, frequently drinks himself into oblivion, or at the very least so that he can't talk properly, today related that he is having the time of his life on honeymoon with his gay partner. Martin Shuttlecock, of Shuttlec...

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Funny story: Local Man Is Product Of Somebody Else's Imagination

Local Man Is Product Of Somebody Else's Imagination

Local man, Martin Shuttlecock was left reeling last night, when he returned home from work, only to find that he is not actually a real person, and even more devastatingly, to discover that not only is his name not actually his own, but that it was i...

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Funny story: Barking Barking man's bite worse than his bark

Barking Barking man's bite worse than his bark

A Barking man is in court for killing and eating pet dogs in his neighbourhood. Paddy Green Chum, 46, from Korea, moved into the area a few weeks ago and was believed to be working as a dog walker. His home-made advertisements for dog-walking can be...

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Funny story: Local Man Admits To Having Wooden Teeth, Plastic Kneecaps, A Concrete Skull, And Being Utterly Witless

Local Man Admits To Having Wooden Teeth, Plastic Kneecaps, A Concrete Skull, And Being Utterly Witless

Local man, Arsene Hipsway, of Titchyfields, Hants, reputedly a neighbour of talentless local fuckwit, Martin Shuttlecock, today admitted that his teeth are made of wood, his kneecaps constructed of window grade uPVC, and his cranium made of reinforce...

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Funny story: Local Man To Buy A Bigger Hat

Local Man To Buy A Bigger Hat

Following the runaway success of his promotional video for The Dorking Review, which he posted on YouTube, local man, Martin Shuttlecock is reputed to be considering buying a new hat. Sources close to Shuttlecock state that his new found internet fam...

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Funny story: Local Pub Offers Delivery Service

Local Pub Offers Delivery Service

A village pub in the heart of Oxfordshire is to offer a free delivery service to the surrounding villages, in a bid to drum up some much needed trade. Badger Smeaton, landlord of the Mutilated Pig Inn and Carvery in Tumbledown Moreton, has seen tr...

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