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Funny story: Nick Clegg outlines plans for electoral reform

Nick Clegg outlines plans for electoral reform

Nick Clegg, deputy leader of the Con-Dems has been outlining his plans to reform the electoral system for the next general election. Before it is implemented, there will be a trial run using the referendum to decide whether to use the new voting syst...

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Funny story: Nick Clogg reveals plans to abolish 'bad' laws

Nick Clogg reveals plans to abolish 'bad' laws

Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clogg has revealed plans to abolish unnecessary laws in a bid to shift the balance of power from the state to the people. The moves are intended to bolster the Coalition pledge that policy makers don't make law. People do. I asked a cross section of society what laws they would like to see repealed. The Smoker Speaking from a 6 inch hole in his throat cel...

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Funny story: Clegg slump scare

Clegg slump scare

Polls suggesting that the LibDems have lost a lot of support for rethinking their policy on VAT have been dismissed as inconsistent by a Party official. 'How can anyone support us in one month and turn on us the next? I have heard of people changi...

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Funny story: Nick Clegg and the Accusations

Nick Clegg and the Accusations

It has been revealed that Nick Clegg is believed to have been accused of making an unfortunate political mistake. This terrible news was revealed by a Political insider who thinks he saw Mr Clegg walking his dog in an incorrect manner on Tuesday.

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Funny story: Nice Nick Criticises Labour For Woefully Underestimating Green's Blunder

Nice Nick Criticises Labour For Woefully Underestimating Green's Blunder

The Office for Football Responsibility says the taxpayer will have to FOOT THE BILL of nearly £9665 trillion because Labour MISJUDGED the effect of England's hapless keeper Robert Green's failure to catch the ball against lowly USA. In a speech,...

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Funny story: Big Brother, Condemned Cameron, tests LibDem trio with a secret task

Big Brother, Condemned Cameron, tests LibDem trio with a secret task

The UK's favourite home for psychological wannabees and weirdos has opened it's doors for the 11th and last time. Yes, Big Brother is back for a summer of fun and frolics. Who will be the first housemate, I wonder, to mention the England v USA gam...

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Funny story: Cameron invites the Daleks to join the coalition

Cameron invites the Daleks to join the coalition

Prime Minister David Cameron has extended an invitation to the Daleks to join the UK's coalition government (but not the gay or Pakistani ones). Phoenix Joe asked Mr Cameron to explain what was behind this latest rather perplexing move. "Well Pho...

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Funny story: Letters to the editor Scottish version

Letters to the editor Scottish version

Dear Sir Smile though your heart is aching Why is Nick Clegg looking so glum? He sits next to his new best friend, the Prime Minister, at PMQ's but he does not appear to participate. The Prime Minister throws his old Etonian jokes back at the Labour Party and sometimes the jokes are funny. Nick doesn't laugh. Is he playing both sides at the same time? Perhaps he is still hiding his fu...

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Funny story: Pot Plants, the Coalition Capers, Mrs Missmiggins and Edmund Slackbladder

Pot Plants, the Coalition Capers, Mrs Missmiggins and Edmund Slackbladder

The ex Chief Secretary to the Treasury and reported to soon be ex MP for Yeovil is alleged to have refused the offer of a pot plant for his now old new office. In fact, he abolished the purchase of pot plants at the Treasury. Treasury officials m...

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Funny story: Nick Clegg Has A Funny Turn Watching Dickinson's Real Deal

Nick Clegg Has A Funny Turn Watching Dickinson's Real Deal

Westminster - Reports are coming in that Deputy PM Nick Clegg came over a bit funny recently watching an episode of Dickinson's Real Deal on an old 19 inch Sony Trinitron TV set. It is thought that Nick Clegg got so engrossed in the antique wheele...

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Funny story: John 'Underpants' Major tests DNA positive for Nick Cleggover paternity

John 'Underpants' Major tests DNA positive for Nick Cleggover paternity

London - (Thongs Can Only Get Wetter): A sordid Whitehole (sic) rumor mill says the ex-Prime Monster is Nick Cleggover's birth father. John 'Underpants' Major was famously blasted by Blair mouthpiece Alastair Campbell about 'tucking his shirt-tail...

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Funny story: Cameron and Clegg To Share Same Suit

Cameron and Clegg To Share Same Suit

New UK Tory Prime Minister David 'Dave' Cameron is likely to share the same suit on a daily basis with his Deputy Lib-Dem Prime Minister Nick 'Nick' Clegg, in a radical cost-cutting plan announced at Westminster yesterday, writes Justin Sycophant for...

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Funny story: Nick Cleggover 'a notorious panty-snatcher'?

Nick Cleggover 'a notorious panty-snatcher'?

London - (Blue Ass Mess): An awful lot of Tory ladies' soiled panties have gone missing since the 6 May general election result. And the defamaTory fingers are starting to wag in Nick Clegg's direction! "Most of the said items of underwear were...

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Funny story: Good Lord almighty, LibCon Lords go large

Good Lord almighty, LibCon Lords go large

The House of Lords has 707 eligible perrs of which 211 take the Labour whip. Despite the fact that these 211 suffered 350 defeats in the last session of Parliament, CamClegg Incorporated need to make another couple of hundred ConDem peers to address...

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Funny story: Nick Clegg is Britain's biggest lottery winner

Nick Clegg is Britain's biggest lottery winner

A 43 year old civil servant has become the UK's biggest Lottery winner after stepping forward to claim the 84 million pound record prize. Nick Clegg from London didn't even realize he had won the fortune until his wife found the ticket in a pair...

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Funny story: Camilla stung by Nick 'Whorsefly' Clegg allegations

Camilla stung by Nick 'Whorsefly' Clegg allegations

Scotland- (Rotters): "It's a wee blood-sucker alright," Birkhall village resident Dr Hamish McHaggis said today, "noted for a ferocious bite and ability to cause immense inflammatory pain. "Some reckon its true habitat involves grubbing around ins...

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Funny story: Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart Love Cameron and Clegg

Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart Love Cameron and Clegg

Fey, faery teenage vampyres Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart are revelling in the UK's new Cam-Clegg-Lib-Dem-Con-Dem Coalition, a source close to a tissue of falsehoods told The Daily Sphincter yesterday, writes Political Editor Carrie Onlying...

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