The Prime Minister has revealed that anti-terrorism measures at this summer's London Olympic Games will include having CCTV cameras in positions enabling them to look inside the various toilet cubicle facilities within the Olympic Village in East Lon...
David Cameron has been outlining what will make the London 2012 Olympics the best that has ever been. "The London Olympics are a true British enterprise," said Cameron. "We bid for them several years ago with the intention of stimulating the econo...
The London Olympic organisers have today revealed that thousands of tickets to the London 2012 Olympics have now suddenly become available. In a hastily-convened press reception at the Old Vic in the East End of London, Lord Notcoe, a spokesperso...
As a special service to our premium subscribers, Northwest NewSmash is pleased to release the top predicted headlines for 2012: 1. Sasha and Malia - The President's Kenyan Child Brides? - Orly Taitz Demands Birth Certificates 2. Republican Candidates Pledge: Human Life Begins At Conception; Human Rights End At Birth 3. 'War On Poverty' Declared Over - Poverty Wins 4. Ron Paul Wins - P...
In terms of musical collaborations you might have expected Lady Gaga to duet with the 'Posh of Spice' Victoria Beckham, but records at companies House suggest that it's hubby David who will be partnering with the Gaga in 2012 - but not in the studio...
The International Bureau of Weights and Measures in Paris today announced that a "leap centimetre" would be added to the length of the metre at midnight on 28th February 2012, to coincide with the addition of an extra day to the year. 'People are...
London - "Maybe it's escaped from the Princess Diana Memorial Fountain," is how one wildlife expert assessed the situation this morning. Wildlife shots of the mystery beastie - definitely not doctored by the BBC or David Attenborough - show a Loc...
London, England - The 2012 Summer Olympic Games, scheduled to take place in London from 27 July to 12 August 2012 were officially canceled today after the International Olympic Committee was unable to comes to terms with Bert Poppins, head of the Eng...
London - The head of the UK Diplomatic Corpse has denounced Wills, Kaye and Harry for gorging their snouts in the Olympics gravy train trough. Sir Archibald Hoggsworth-Attashay said today the newly appointed London 2012 ambassadors 'were only in i...
Mexico - Stargazers at Mexico's National Institute for Anthropology, History and Mayan Calendar Rants have published new evidence from temple ruin brick fragments at Tortuguero, Tabasco State. Glyphs representing a Venus conjunction 'with a myster...
Several thousand of the seats already fitted in the various stadiums at East London's Olympic Village will have to be taken out and replaced with reinforced ones. The decision to change the seats has been taken because of concerns raised by Health an...
Most Britons were agitated today as they learned that the Bank of England issued a new fifty-pound note. In the height of the worst recession in history the government decided that this would be a great idea to unify Britons and prepare for the 201...
Security at the 2012 Olympics will be as tight as its ever been but experts have said they are training up tigers to deal with any major trouble makers. "The eyes of the world will be on us and if we let trouble get out of hand we'll be the laughi...
The Metropolitan Police have asked retailers to free up shop staff on full pay (minimum wage?) to work as special constables with full Police powers...as in 'cannon fodder'...during the olympic Games debacle. The programme called (ironically) ESP...
In yet another shock announcement it would appear that the UK is woefully short of around 11,000 security staff to oversee the forthcoming Olympic Games fiasco in 2012! Upon hearing this shock announcement President Obama immediately summoned his...
Preparations are now underway to ensure the safe journey of the Olympic Flame from the ancient Greek site of Olympia to the Olympic Stadium in London, for the 2012 Olympic Games. 'Many people wonder how the Flame can travel all that way without mi...
Officials from the 2012 Olympic Committee have confirmed that they are rejecting several exhibition sports from this summer's games in London. While there will still be an international competition of Qigong, and a Rowing challenge, it was annou...
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