The UK government has introduced a radical measure to stop the ever growing rate of obesity, all fat people are to be shot. The UK has the worse record in the world for obesity with actually 1 in 2 adults classed as either being overweight or obe...
Chicago, Illinois - "I'm taking one more step for man and one more giant leap for mankind," said an excited Oprah to her studio audience as she announced that President-elect Barack Obama has promised her an ambassadorship to the planet closest to th...
Fat Boy George O'Dowd, was found guilty by a group of people, that enjoy seeing celebrities brought to their knees. The 1980's pop sensation was found guilty of being fat, bald, and looking "very ordinary". He was also found guilty of the lesser c...
The cheeky lawyer intent on getting Boy George sent down, told a stunned jury "Mr Boy George is so morbidly obese, anyone can take a pop at him and win. Even a newly-born kitten with polio and one kidney, could 'see off' Culture Club-Sandwich's form...
In an effort to combat the obesity epidemic running rife through Britain £30million has been earmarked to five towns and cities across the UK to allow the to fight the flab. Manchester Council leader Pat Carnivore is to receive £10million of the p...
The ugly, fat, stupid looking retarded kid who dances like a beached whale at a spastic convention, and appears as the animated avatar of average writer Jesus Budda, has demanded that the image be removed from public display. 'Little' Jimmy Bastar...
Washington, DC: In a public announcement form, television and radio programs were interupted yesterday and given the order that the nation's slow should keep to the right. "This should be a great help in jammed up Wal-Marts and grocery type store...
Scientist have claimed that recent studies into "Anthropomorphic Obesity" have shown that in most cases its the body shape that determines whether a person is classified as obese and not, as previously thought, the amount of chips they eat. In a s...
Manuel Uribe of Monterrey, Mexico, classed as the World's Heaviest Man by the Guiness Book for weighing 1260 pounds, will marry his long time girlfriend this week. The Bride is also a person of note in the Guiness Book, having the record for being...
Wales has once again retained its crown as the fattest country in the UK after being named and shamed by the National Health Service. According to the latest NHS survey, five of the six fat hot spots in Britain are Welsh. Only the Shetland Island...
Clothing manufacturers have been told to reduce waistband sizes of all clothes produced in a bid to solve the obesity epidemic gripping the UK. The new regulations coming into effect on 1st January 2009 mean that trousers, skirts and such like wil...
While the southern border of the US of A is being blockaded by imported bricks from the Berlin Wall, California has a new idea, what's new? The Eastern boundary of the state of California will now be patrolled by the TFSPC (Trans Fatties State Police...
Sports writers have been celebrating the 12,000 calorie diet that has made Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps perhaps the greatest aquatic athlete in history. When spoofster, Pointillius Pointer read about the swimmer's eating regimen leading up to the O...
Frank Lampard has revealed to respected German Newspaper Wunter Under Meijer that he founded his own charity after receiving his first payslip from West Ham. Lampard took a moment to put down the Pukka Pies and go into detail with
Kokomo, Indiana - Lovers of Pizza Shed pizza were thrilled today when it was announced that the corporation would be introducing its new "Lard Lovers" pizza sometime in May.
No one would have guessed that the universally recognized Worst President Ever, George W Bush would be the scientifically acclaimed savior of the obesity of the Ameri-can.
Aimes, IA Susan Kessler set out to prove Saturday night, that she's wasn't going to let the fact that she is classified as morbidly obese stop her from having a good time.
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