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Donald Trump Takes Possession of Elizabeth Warren's House

Funny story: Donald Trump Takes Possession of Elizabeth Warren's House

The president went over to the Senator's house this morning to tell her that she is not a real Native American. When he got there, he exclaimed, "Look what I discovered!" He then claimed ownership of her house, and handed her a blanket infected...

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Judge Kavanaugh Declares Rape Legal In Unilateral Decision

Funny story: Judge Kavanaugh Declares Rape Legal In Unilateral Decision

In a move with no apparent legal precedent, Judge Kavanaugh climbed up on top of the big wooden desk, to the surprise of the other "Supremes." He ripped open his robe, baring his chest, and screamed, "I declare rape legal." The other justices rema...

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Thousands Of Flies Build Nest On Lindsey Graham's Head

Funny story: Thousands Of Flies Build Nest On Lindsey Graham's Head

In the heat of the Judge Kavanaugh hearings, Senator Lindsey Graham started swatting flies, that seemed to be buzzing around him during his address to the Senate floor: "I've made up my mind, and decided BIll Cosby is pre-approved for a spot on th...

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Trump Appoints Bill Cosby To Supreme Court

Funny story: Trump Appoints Bill Cosby To Supreme Court

President Trump signed an executive order, bypassing the confirmation process, and placing the former actor as judge for life on the nation's highest judiciary body. "I like rapists who win," said the serial perv, "not losers who let the victim ge...

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Guy Shows Up At Interview Drunk

Funny story: Guy Shows Up At Interview Drunk

The candidate was slurring his speech, and said under oath, "I like to drink a whoooooooooooole lot!" He then whipped out and chugged a whole bottle of Jack Daniels, then overturned the desk and made a grab for one of the interviewers, who promptl...

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Buffalo Bills Admit They're Not Trying To Win

Funny story: Buffalo Bills Admit They're Not Trying To Win

A high level official in the Buffalo Bills organization, who refuses to reveal his name, has decided to reveal all in a shocking confession that will rock the football world. "I had to get this off my chest. It's not fair to the fans. Those poor s...

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Melania Trump Wears "I'm with stupid" T-Shirt At State Dinner

Funny story: Melania Trump Wears "I'm with stupid" T-Shirt At State Dinner

At a fancy dinner attended by all the great dignitaries of world affairs, the president and first concubine of China were caught in open mouth stares when they heard the translation of what Melania Trump's t-shirt read. The ambassador to Chile spi...

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President Trump Eaten Alive By Gang Of Rabid Squirrels

Funny story: President Trump Eaten Alive By Gang Of Rabid Squirrels

The president was standing on the White House lawn, holding an open jar of Trump Peanut butter, as he was getting ready to announce his bold new plan to make it the official condiment of the Olympic Games, when out of seemingly nowhere, a great commo...

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Beatles Getting Back Together

Funny story: Beatles Getting Back Together

At a London press conference, Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr announced their plans to get the rock group back together and start touring again. The plans involve cloning John Lennon and George Harrison in a procedure costing an estimated 21 Billi...

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President Trump Resigns After A Job Well Done

Funny story: President Trump Resigns After A Job Well Done

Citing his unbelievable success at everything he has ever attempted, Donald Trump resigned from the office of president of the United States. I have achieved all I have set out to accomplish in record time. My ratings were greater than any other...

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Stock Market Goes Down, Then Up, Then Down Again.

Funny story: Stock Market Goes Down, Then Up, Then Down Again.

The stock market went up, then down, then up, then down, then up, then down. It then rose before dropping. This was quickly followed by an increase, which was interrupted by a fall. The market then went up, then back down. It went up, down, u...

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Satan Resigns

Funny story: Satan Resigns

The CEO of the underworld released a short statement this morning: I hereby announce my resignation, not because I've done anything wrong, mind you, but because my work here is done. My bucket list for the world is complete. They say it's best...

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"I Will Build A Space Force and The Martians Will Pay For It!"

Funny story: "I Will Build A Space Force and The Martians Will Pay For It!"

The president signed an executive order diverting all the people's pensions into his new program, whose new motto will be "To Infinity And Beyond", in honor of the projected budget. "And the best part is the Martians are going to pay for it. Trust...

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Physicists Replace String Theory With Fidget Spinner Theory

Funny story: Physicists Replace String Theory With Fidget Spinner Theory

Claiming that String Theory, the theory that the universe is composed of tiny strings which behave like both waves and particles, makes too much sense, and is too intuitive, and must therefore be false, physicists at a big impressive conference met a...

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Congress Votes To Raise Own Pay 35%

Funny story: Congress Votes To Raise Own Pay 35%

In a unanimous decision that leaders were quick to praise for its stunning lack of partisanship, the United States Congress decided to raise its own pay to a whopping 980,000 dollars a year, an increase of 300%, citing the 2 percent rise in the cost...

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3 Large Corporations To Merge into The Beast

Funny story: 3 Large Corporations To Merge into The Beast

In what scriptural scholars agree is a sure fire sign of the end of times, the heads of three giant communications companies skyped each other in a secret illegal collusioney meeting, which was somehow leaked five minutes later, most likely through t...

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United Nations Gives Up

Funny story: United Nations Gives Up

With tears in his eyes, Grand Counsel, Watta Doushpag made a short statement today, which in effect dissolves the international organization founded in 1791 for the mission of putting an end to war, and maintaining world peace forever. "What's the...

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American President Challenges Queen To Winner Take All Wrestling Match

Funny story: American President Challenges Queen To Winner Take All Wrestling Match

Exactly as one might expect from a brain damaged horse's arse, Donald Trump once again made an outrageous and childish move with the goal of drawing further attention to himself by calling a press conference and challenging the Queen to a winner take...

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Breaking news…

Trump Sorry For 'Horseface' Tweet

Trump apologizes to Stormy Daniels for calling her 'horseface' in a
tweet. Tweet was actually meant for Kelly Ann Conway.
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