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Fearing Political Tsunami in November, Republicans Adopt New Approaches

Funny story: Fearing Political Tsunami in November, Republicans Adopt New Approaches

THE WIRED STREET URINAL REPORTER KR Schwartz DATELINE: September 27th 2018 Washington, D.C. Fearing Political Tsunami in November, Republicans Adopt New Approaches Feeling the mounting political pressure from constituents over the Senate Judi...

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The Hunt for "Deep Thought"

Funny story: The Hunt for "Deep Thought"

This morning before dawn, the doorbell at my home chimed. When I stumbled to the door, no one was there, but an envelope was laying against my door. I took it into the kitchen to make a cup of coffee before opening it, but curiosity reigned supreme. Inside I found the document inserted below on White House letterhead stationery, emblazoned with a watermark spelling out “CONFIDENTIAL” obliquely...

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Shocking Estimate of 2018 Voter Turnout

Funny story: Shocking Estimate of 2018 Voter Turnout

Friday, the C.I.A. released a preliminary report outlining the anticipated voter turnout in the 2018 US mid-term elections and the impact of Russian interference. CIA Director Mike Pompeo told this reporter, “All indications reflect the Russian tu...

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Hatch Hatches Plan

Funny story: Hatch Hatches Plan

Senior Utah Republican Senator Orrin Hatch spoke to NBC News correspondent Frank Thorp Wednesday, saying he would prefer for FBI confirmed domestic abusing White House Staff Secretary Rob Porter not to resign, but instead to just “work his way throug...

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Trump Executes Orders

Funny story: Trump Executes Orders

This morning, President Trump utilized his “executive time;” normally spent watching “Fox & Friends,” firing off tweets recommended by Sean Hannity or watching “Roadrunner” cartoons, to execute (2) new Executive Orders and one widely anticipated...

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Manafort Deluge Has Begun

Funny story: Manafort Deluge Has Begun

Following the multi-count indictment unsealed this morning against Paul Manafort, US Postal Inspectors have initiated intense scrutiny of Mr. Manafort's conventional snail mail. So far, by 2:00 PM EST Monday, Mr. Manafort has received 20,640 solic...

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Discovery: Delivered to Wrong Address... Purloined

Funny story: Discovery: Delivered to Wrong Address... Purloined

TiVo 2 Circle Star Way San Carlos, CA 94070 May 11th 2017 El Presidente Donaldo Juan Trump La Casa Blanca 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue Washington D.C. 20050 Dear SEŇOR SUPREME Presidente Trump, This is to confirm our oral contract of May 9th, 2017, where our corporation agrees to pay $25,000.00 to th...

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Casa Blanca Press Credential Bidding - FOX News wins competitive bidding for White House Press Corps Credentials

Funny story: Casa Blanca Press Credential Bidding - FOX News wins competitive bidding for White House Press Corps Credentials

This morning, Sarah Huckabee Sanders gleefully issued a two-line press release declaring FOX News to be the winner of a covert "competitive" bidding war for White House Corps press credentials. Terms of the winning bid were not disclosed. Sand...

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Comey Firing Recommendation A Forgery!

Funny story: Comey Firing Recommendation A Forgery!

Forensic Scientist Discovers Acting US Attorney General's Recommendations for Comey's Firing Was Actually Written by Dr. Harold Bornstein Late Thursday evening, Sandia Lab scientist, Dr. Irwin Corey announced the results of his analysis of Acting...

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Trump Plan Leaves Reporters Wall Eyed

Funny story: Trump Plan Leaves Reporters Wall Eyed

Thursday, Presidente Donaldo Juan Trump outlined bold initiatives to finance the construction of an impenetrable barrier to the southern border of the United States. In a joint venture with the Church & Dwight Company, the first stage of the wall...

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The Wired Street Urinal - an editorial

Funny story: The Wired Street Urinal - an editorial

On Wednesday, Republican nominee for President, Donald J. Trump proclaimed he is the messiah. Addressing a crowd of cerebrally anesthetized souls in a state of rapture in West Palm Beach Florida, Trump demonstrated his capacity to mesmerize with a br...

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The Donald Unchained & Unglued

Funny story: The Donald Unchained & Unglued

On Tuesday, Republican nominee for President, Donald J. Trump announced, "Like Marcus Garvey, I have thrown off the shackles! After running a campaign marked by a concerted effort to seek national unity, racial and ethnic harmony, and party cohesion,...

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New Measures Taken at Hofstra University

Funny story: New Measures Taken at Hofstra University

The Sigma Kappa Alpha Tau political science honor fraternity of Hofstra University has had metal detectors removed from all entrances leading into the auditorium that will be the stage of the 1st Presidential Debate of the 2016 election. Bartholo...

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Trump's Debate Invitees

Funny story: Trump's Debate Invitees

According to Hofstra University officials, Donald Trump's campaign staff requested 5,000 tickets for "special guests" of Mr. Trump. In response, a purported Hofstra official told the Trump Organization: "The entire venue only holds 5,500 people t...

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Guantánamo Detainee Refuses Offer of Release After 14 Years in Prison and Tosses Conical Hat in the Ring

Funny story: Guantánamo Detainee Refuses Offer of Release After 14 Years in Prison and Tosses Conical Hat in the Ring

WASHINGTON - Three Guantánamo detainees were slated to leave the American prison in Cuba this week after 14 years in captivity, but early Wednesday morning, only two were willing to board the plane. The third - Mohammed Ali Abdullah Bwazir of Yemen -...

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FOX News Releases Coiffe of August 6th Republican Myiasis

Funny story: FOX News Releases Coiffe of August 6th Republican Myiasis

(New York) FOX News President Roger Ailes, in association with the New York State Athletic Commission President Tom Hoover and the Ohio Athletic Commission Chairman Tim Ochsenhirt, this morning outlined the protocol and procedures that have been adop...

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Recrudescence of political claptrap in 2015 presidential election

Funny story: Recrudescence of political claptrap in 2015 presidential election

Once again, Americans are treated to a display of obscene self-promotion of egomaniacal proportion only fusing the personalities of P.T. Barnum, Madonna, Kim Kardashian, Kim Jong Un, and Idi Amin Dada could match. "The Donald;" oh you remember him -...

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Ted Cruz Hopes Early Campaign Entry Will Divert Voters' Attention from More Important Issues, like Legitimate Candidates and Serious Domestic Problems

Funny story: Ted Cruz Hopes Early Campaign Entry Will Divert Voters' Attention from More Important Issues, like Legitimate Candidates and Serious Domestic Problems

Rafael Edward Cruz, a first-term Senator from Texas, dispensing with any exploratory phase for his Presidential aspirations, delivered a formal speech during the weekly convocation at Liberty University in Lynchburg, Virginia yesterday. The Bapti...

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