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Root For England Skipper Say Foes

Funny story: Root For England Skipper Say Foes

Calls to promote England cricket's new young hero, Joe Root, to captain were welcomed around the world today. The 22-year-old who has scored centuries in back-to-back tests is being hailed as the man save England cricket following the dismal run u...

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Halloween Poetry Has Local Housewives Flustered

Funny story: Halloween Poetry Has Local Housewives Flustered

Local housewives were left flustered last night thanks to schoolboys and their enthusiasm for Halloween larks. Answering the door to suspected trick-or-treaters the women were, in stead, surprised to be regaled with romantic poetry. "It all sta...

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Alice Roberts Fans Irate Over Scheduling Fiasco

Funny story: Alice Roberts Fans Irate Over Scheduling Fiasco

Fans of thinking man's totty boffin Alice Roberts are furious at what they describe as a scheduling "fiasco" with tonight's prime-time viewing. Prof Roberts's latest programme Prehistoric Autopsy screens at 9pm on BBC2 - clashing directly with pop...

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Andrew Strauss Steps Down - Graeme Smith 'Devastated.'

Funny story: Andrew Strauss Steps Down - Graeme Smith 'Devastated.'

South African cricket captain Graeme Smith is said to be "devastated" following the news that Andrew Strauss is to retire from professional cricket. Strauss was expected to announce his resignation today after a winter and summer during which his...

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International Superstars Line Up For Stricken Pompey!

Funny story: International Superstars Line Up For Stricken Pompey!

Cristiano Ronaldo, Lionel Messi, Carlos Tevez, Juan Mata... a team line-up to die for? Well it seems fans of stricken Portsmouth, will soon be on life support as some of the greatest names in the game sign up to help the club out of its difficulti...

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Olympics Spur On Local Gymnastic Hopefuls

Funny story: Olympics Spur On Local Gymnastic Hopefuls

A local playground is the centre of Great Britain's hopes for gymnastic gold in 2016 and beyond. While groups of yummy mummies and alpha mums look on with pride, toddlers and youngsters barely out of nappies are learning the ropes on the apparatus...

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Tony Blair "All Wrong" Over Not Hanging Bankers Says Academic

Funny story: Tony Blair "All Wrong" Over Not Hanging Bankers Says Academic

Former Prime Minister Tony Blair is wrong when he says we should not hang bankers in anger over the current financial mess, says a leading academic. In an interview with the Daily Telegraph today, Mr Blair defends the free market and liberal econo...

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Professor Green, Elton John And Queen Star At Centre Of Rock Heirarchy Row

Funny story: Professor Green, Elton John And Queen Star At Centre Of Rock Heirarchy Row

Some of Britain's top pop and rock stars are at the centre of a row over heirarchy following publication of a letter about music piracy in a national newspaper. The letter to the Daily Telegraph is signed by pop mogul Simon Cowell, Roger Daltrey a...

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Clean Sweep For Police At Dorking Summer Festival

Funny story: Clean Sweep For Police At Dorking Summer Festival

Dorking Police's amateur hobbyists were celebrating yesterday after sweeping the board at the town's Annual Festival. The force's enthusiasts picked up the top gongs in contests for painting, photography, acting, gardening... you name it: if there...

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U2's Adam Upset Over "Greedy" Gibe

Funny story: U2's Adam Upset Over "Greedy" Gibe

Adam Clayton, bass player with Irish megastar rock band U2, is said to be "upset and in hiding" following a court case in which his personal assistant was jailed for seven years. Carol Hawkins was jailed by Judge Patrick McCartan at Dublin's Circu...

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Shannon Airport's US Emigration Facilities "Cause Concern." Apparently.

Funny story: Shannon Airport's US Emigration Facilities "Cause Concern." Apparently.

The future of pre-clearance US emigration facilities at Shannon Airport, Ireland, is causing concern. UK Irish community newspaper The Irish World reports this week: "It comes amid reports that the US Department of Homeland Security is set to redu...

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Question Time Braced For Anarchy

Funny story: Question Time Braced For Anarchy

Never mind the bollocks - it's Question Time! BBC chiefs are bracing themselves for they don't quite know what tonight as political debate show Question Time features former Sex Pistol John Lydon as a panellist. Lydon - or Johnny Rotten, as he...

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Fashion Store Plans Nazi Europe T-Shirt After Success Of Slave Trade Version

Funny story: Fashion Store Plans Nazi Europe T-Shirt After Success Of Slave Trade Version

A nationwide fashion chain is planning to market a T-shirt bearing a print of a Nazi map of Europe in 1943. TossPot came up with the idea following the success of a shirt whose design is a reproduction of an antique map depicting the transatlantic...

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Higgs Boson Found! It's About Time Says Sweeney Vet

Funny story: Higgs Boson Found! It's About Time Says Sweeney Vet

Cern scientists revealing results from the Large Hadron Collider have claimed the discovery of a new particle consistent with the Higgs boson. Boffins have been searching for 45 years for the particle which they believe will explain how matter at...

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Cristiano Ronaldo's Penalty Miss Hilarious Says Expert

Funny story: Cristiano Ronaldo's Penalty Miss Hilarious Says Expert

A top football expert has branded Spain's progression to the final of Euro 2012 'hilarious'. EIF News & Features sports editor, Thelonious Adidas, was watching the Portugal v Spain semi-final on TV at his home in West Wittering because we refu...

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Robert Peston To Seek Hollywood Career

Funny story: Robert Peston To Seek Hollywood Career

Top broadcast journalist Robert Peston has ambitious career plans for when the current world-wide financial crisis ends. The BBC's business editor is planning to take Hollywood by storm and star in a series of adventure blockbusters portraying the...

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Peeping Tom 'Not Such A Bad Guy' Say Academics

Funny story: Peeping Tom 'Not Such A Bad Guy' Say Academics

History boffins are calling for the rehabilitation of a legendary pervert who research suggests wasn't such a bad guy after all. Peeping Tom has been the nickname for pervert voyeurs ever since the middle ages when, according to legend, he looked...

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Holyrood Cabinet Goes On Tour - Ministers In Fear Of Salmond's Tests

Funny story: Holyrood Cabinet Goes On Tour - Ministers In Fear Of Salmond's Tests

Scottish ministers fear the savage retribution of their leader after their annual summer tour of the country during which they will hold meetings on Skye, and in Renfrew and Orkney. This will be the fifth consecutive year that the Cabinet has emba...

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