Showing stories written by JTamarkin

Try another search?

Trump Not 239lbs?

Following everyone's disbelief, today it was announced that Donald Trump's true body weight two days before his recent physical was 311 pounds. A large amount of fat was sucked, 72 pounds to be exact, out of him just before his actual physical. A...

Read full story View 'Trump Not 239lbs?'

Chris Christie Shits Out a Large FedEx Tracking Chip

Chris Christie ended up in an ER in Passaic today after tearing his asshole while shitting out a (supposedly edible) electronic FedEx human tracking device. "I ate this elephant sized electronic FedEx thing yesterday. And today, it got stuck s...

Read full story View 'Chris Christie Shits Out a Large FedEx Tracking Chip'

Bernie Sanders Teams Up with Colonel Sanders

KFC has announced that all of its 7 Vermont locations will now feature Bernie Sanders cookbook recipes mixed with Colonel Sanders' old favorites. New menu items include: Karl Marx progressive Jewish commie chicken patties, grilled Hillary extr...

Read full story View 'Bernie Sanders Teams Up with Colonel Sanders'

Donald Trump Opens His & Herspanic Gastro Pubs

Funny story: Donald Trump Opens His & Herspanic Gastro Pubs

Donald Trump has decided to embrace and glorify Mexico's rich history: "Because I've employed thousands and thousands of His and Herspanics, the time is right to open a chain of His & Herspanic eateries." The chain, named "Hola Amigoas!", wil...

Read full story View 'Donald Trump Opens His & Herspanic Gastro Pubs'

Ted Cruz Bobblehead Night

Honoring the famous sons and daughters of Canada, the Flin Flon Flayers of the Provincial and Extra-Provincial League will host Ted Cruz Bobblehead Night on August 15th when thy take on the Moose Jaw Motherchuckers at 7:05 Canadian Prairie Time.

Read full story View 'Ted Cruz Bobblehead Night'

Donald Trump Treated for Depression

A day after his dog was run over by a taco deliveryman in Palm Beach, The Donald has started taking large doses of Zoloft. Trump's dog, Niggard Lee, was flattened early Tuesday afternoon on Worth Avenue when Taco Expresso driver Jorge Cruz Lim...

Read full story View 'Donald Trump Treated for Depression'

Greece Grexits Gracefully

Saying goodbye to the euro, and not wanting to reintroduce the dreaded drachma, Greece has named its new currency the "big gyro." Stefan Poopadoopalot, spokesman for what's left of the government in Athens, outlined exactly what goes into a bi...

Read full story View 'Greece Grexits Gracefully'

Breaking news…

Sales blames ring for illness

Boston Red Sox baseball player "Lefty" Sales said his cock ring made him sick. "It turned my penis green," he said. "My girlfriend paid for gold, but obviously, the jeweler sold her brass."
Increase speedPlayback speedIncrease speed Help
Skip backwardsPausePlaySkip forward
Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
47 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more